《No Filter x Serial Dating》Show My Ass Like A Stank Hoe

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Gon, stripping & serenading Zushi Roll: "—hold it—pass it—down. Pat it—lick it—pull it—down."

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igma Alpha was a notorious frat at Yorknew University. Their reputation wasn't terrible, but it wasn't great, either. They boasted a roster of wealthy inheritors of nepotism that Killua despised, but at least their philanthropic attitudes were up to par with charities he supported. It was because of this that it didn't physically pain him to step past the iron wrought gate attached to a brick hedge lining the Sigma Alpha property.

There was a ceramic crest posted above the doorway. Bright, colored lights flashed in the windows and cast the moving silhouettes of partygoers across the lawn. There were people outside playing lawn games and drinking on the couches that were dragged out from the living room and posted on the lawn.

There was a table blocking the walkway to the door and, sitting there, were Sigma Alpha guys with a sheet of paper filled to the edges with guest names.

"Name, please," the guy said to Zushi, who put his hand out to the guy's buddy as he said his name. They crossed his name out and stamped his hand before moving on to Killua.

Killua rubbed his hand over the ink on his hand as they passed the check-in table. There was a group of girls waiting behind them decked out in Hunter gear and green beads that had Killua rolling his eyes. As if camouflage mini skirts were attractive, but the guys at the table seemed to get a kick out of them.

"Are you excited?" Zushi said as they climbed the stoop steps.

The bass was already buzzing in Killua's chest. He grinned at Zushi, feeling more brazen than anything. He spent the entire semester playing Good—it was time to be an actual, goddamn college student.

"Hell yeah, let's do this," Killua said, slapping Zushi on the back and pushing him forward by the shoulders.

The front door was propped open so that when they stepped in, they were transported into the dark foyer and crowds of people on the outskirts of the party room. There was a stairwell to their left that circled up to the second floor, which overlooked the living room with a balcony. They bypassed the stairs in favor of slipping into the masses. Zushi hung onto the hem of Killua's shirt and Killua, intent on keeping Zushi close, kept his hand on Zushi's shoulder.

The living room was packed. The tiled floor was slick with fluid and it smelled like smoke, which lingered in the air and cast clouds through the flashing lights, swirling with the heads that jumped to the music. The speakers were on full blast, shaking the floor under Killua's sneakers and pumping vibrant energy through every vein of Killua's body.

Underneath the vaulted ceiling and the eyes of people lingering at the second floor balcony, Killua's borderline manic thrill brought a smile to his face as he and Zushi danced and swayed to the beat. They jumped in at just the right moment when the music blended into the next song and a girl came up to him and reached for his raised hand.

Killua laughed as she spun herself around on his finger and turned to him, bright pink hair swinging to the side with the motion of her hips. He followed the casual sway of her hips in those dark leggings. She slotted her leg between his and, with them both ducked low, they danced as one with her hand guiding his along her hips. Killua glanced at Zushi from over her shoulder, but he already had a partner to dance with, so Killua's focus went back to the smirk on the girl's face as the instrumentals shifted and they took the motion forward and back, shoulders swaying, her hand traveling up to his hair.

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He didn't mind dancing with strangers one bit, so he wasn't at all opposed when he felt someone's back against his, his shoulder pressed up against another, and the sensation of the music pulsing through his chest.

Three songs went by, blended seamlessly into each other. When the beat shifted again, Killua reached for Zushi's wrist and, smirking at the look on Zushi's face, he turned his back to Zushi's front and rolled back against his chest. Zushi laughed in his ear and said, "Are you drunk?" over the music. "Are you actually dancing with me?! What is this!"

"It's called getting turnt!"

Zushi threw his head back and barked out a laugh. Killua grabbed Zushi's hands and slapped them on his hips. "You sound like a grandpa when you say that!" Zushi said.

"Want me to say it again?" he teased, rolling his hips back against Zushi's with a laugh at the sound that came out of Zushi's mouth.

"You're so embarrassing, oh my God," Zushi groaned.

They didn't get to dance much longer than half a minute before the music dimmed before ceasing altogether. The lights came on in the room as the DJ tapped a finger on the mic. People booed and put their middle fingers in the air until the DJ waved his hand to get everyone's attention, saying, "Ladies, ladies, relax! It's that time of the night!"

Killua straightened up and turned to raise an eyebrow at Zushi. Zushi shrugged, only to jump when a girl next to him screamed and pointed behind them. Killua thought they were about to be murdered by a man with an axe, but instead, everyone was pulling out their phones and recording it?

The stairs were visible from their vantage point, if a bit obscured by the crowd. The DJ slowly turned up the volume, Champions started playing to the sound of him declaring, "I present to Yorknew—the best fucking team of the CENTURRYYYYY—!"

The dance floor exploded into cheers. Killua hadn't expected to have his eardrums blown out of commission, but shit, if that wasn't what happened.

From the stairs descended the Yorknew Hunters football team in rows of two. Knuckle Bine was at the head of the crew, waving like a princess at a parade. Zushi laughed at the sight, nudging Killua in the arm as he pointed out the wide receiver, Shoot, who followed behind Knuckle wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a gold crown.

Overall, though, they were decked out in formal wear like they were prepping for Homecoming Weekend. Killua grinned at the sight of Freecss pulling up behind the main upperclassmen squad, perched on the shoulders of two linebackers—Uvogin and a junior by the name Zepile. A particularly loud roar went up for him as Freecss put his fists in the air, a wide, goofy smile on his face as he bounded from their shoulders and landed with a jump like some goddamn gymnast.

A round of claps went through the room before Champions shifted to Big Bank. The room warped once more into the scene of a frat party. The dancing commenced around them and, disoriented, Killua barely processed the fact that Zushi was waving frantically to Gon from over the heads of strangers. When Gon spotted them, it completely ripped Killua from the party vibe he'd been in. His confidence went down the drain and would have continued to spiral had he not become distracted by the familiar pink-haired beauty spinning back into his field of vision.

As she spun, she took his hand up and put it over her shoulder. Killua glanced over at where Gon caught sight of Zushi and started in their direction. Shit. She swayed back around, her shoulders grazing against his chest and pushing him to follow the beat with her hips pushed back against his. She hooked her hand on the wrist he leant over her shoulder and he promptly ignored the fact that Gon would see it all if he looked past Zushi at all.

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On the speakers, Big Sean was saying, "Three coins that'll pay your whole semestaaa but you gotta ride it better than a Teslaaaa—" and somewhere in the middle, Killua could hear Gon singing with it like this was his anthem or some shit.

"Big bank take lil' bank," Gon was saying, shaking his shoulders and looking like an infant gangster with his maroon button-up half unbuttoned. He started undoing the buttons and sidling up to Zushi, who looked both embarrassed and amused at the crowd that was watching with their phones out as Gon's abs started to show inch-by-inch against Zushi. He started singing Nicki Minaj as she blasted on the speakers, "Diamond chains on my ankles—Young Money in the cut like a shank though—Tell TIP rubber band's on my BANK ROLL—! Shake my ass like a stank—"

Gon paused in the middle of all the giggling and cheering. Killua didn't know what he was staring at until he realized that he was staring directly at Gon's dilated pupils from over the girl's bright pink hair. The girl gathered it faster than him, though, and reached a hand out to Gon with a little "come here" gesture, biting her lip.

Gon took Zushi by the arm and pulled him over. The crowd filled the gap they left behind, and Killua didn't miss the way girls leant over to see Gon's exposed chest as he took the girl by the hand and ducked down to kiss it.

"And to who do I owe this pleasure?" Gon said to her, the slur in his voice hinting to his cheeky smirk and that goddamn dimple on his cheek that Killua was so certain didn't exist before that night.

"I'm Machi, and this is the best dancer on the floor," the girl said, pointing her thumb back at Killua.

Upbeat, Latin trumpets started blaring on the speakers to the tune of, "Yeeeaah baby! I like it like that!" The crowd cheered as Gon met Killua's eyes again and, tugging on Machi's hand, spun them around and dipped her. She yelped in his arms before springing back up into Zushi's arms. Gon took Killua's now empty hands and yanked him forward.

Their noses nearly touched. Killua blinked, startled, and smelled hard liquor on Gon's breath as he breathed, "Show me what you can do, Mr. I-Don't-Know-How-To-Dance."

Killua's heart stuttered to an abrupt halt. He looked between Gon's eyes, but it seemed like Gon was determined. He dragged his arms out of Gon's grasp in favor of placing them on Gon's hips and pulling him flush to Killua's front.

Even if his heart failed him, he'd keep up appearances. If all else failed, he'd die from embarrassment and not have to deal with the consequences.

So, when Cardi B took over the song, he popped their hips together and rolled his hips in a slanted, circular grind that, when Gon followed the lead, brought them low and steady to the beat. Those that had their eyes on them whistled obnoxiously as Gon laughed and gave Killua an encouraging smile when the verse shifted tempo and Killua's left foot stepped back, pivoting until he was dancing on his own, hands up to his shoulders as he spun, cranking his hands like he was a cog in a machine that jerked to a halt at the Spanish verse.

He rolled his torso nice and slow. He could feel the heat of the room getting to his head where his breath was gone, eyes channeling on the colored lights circling the living room. Gon's hands curved over his hips, flatting over his abdomen. He felt the clamminess of Gon's skin against his back as they resumed grinding again. A shuddered breath nearly took Killua out at the knees when Gon's hand grazed lower to the tingling skin of his inner thigh. Every inch of his skin was quivering at the touch, and the sensation of Gon's damp breath against his ear, tickling his neck.

They rocked together through the song at the end of which, everyone had went on with their lives and Gon shouted over the music, "Have you gotten something to drink yet?"

Killua turned, shaking his head. He could barely stand straight and, thankfully, Gon steadied him with a hand on his back. He wondered if his lightheadedness was obvious.

Gon gestured towards the archway at the far side of the living room. Killua nodded and reached out to tap Zushi on the shoulder. He waved to get his friend's attention at which point he pointed over to where Gon was starting to lead the way. "We're getting something to drink!" Killua explained.

Zushi and the pink-haired girl hurried to follow. The girl held Zushi by the hand and tugged on Killua's arm to keep the three of them connected. They wove through the crowd as dense electronic music shook the room and flashed the strobe lights over them. The motion through the crowd became choppy, blending together into one vast sheet of silhouettes abruptly overexposed, the lights glistening on the sweaty sheen of their foreheads.

Killua's head buzzed, vision swaying until they were at last beyond the crowd. The air was distinctly salty on his tongue as he trailed after the sight of Gon's loose, maroon shirt billowing behind him on his way down the stairs to the basement of the frat house.

People lined the railing of the stairs, sitting, standing, all of the above. Killua passed them by and took Machi's hand when she offered it. At the base of the stairs, Killua nearly tripped into Gon's back when he stopped, suddenly distracted by the group of football guys gathered in the dingy basement.

The frat house basement honestly looked like the set of a horror film. From the concrete floors to the cement brick walls, Killua was certain he saw this same scene in a murder mystery before. It likely involved a cellar and a serial killer. Distinctly, he felt Machi squeeze his hand tighter as she shifted closer to Zushi's side.

The basement had less of a crowd, but a crowd nonetheless. A makeshift bar had been set up at the far side of the basement. A wooden shelf on the wall was lined with liquor bottles and two of the frat guys were playing bartender.

Gon turned back to them, pointing to where Knuckle Bine sat on a makeshift chair made of plastic cartons. "Knuckle brought Jack Daniels if you're into that, otherwise we can get something from the bar."

Killua grimaced a little, but Zushi seemed fine with whiskey. Knuckle got up to throw his arms around Zushi and, likewise, Machi. Machi's eyes went wide as her cheek was pushed up against the quarterback's massive pec. Her hand dropped from Killua's.

"Do you like whiskey?" Gon asked.

Killua shook his head. "Nah. I'm not much for hard liquor."

Gon crossed his arms and leant back against the archway beam. "So what do you like?"

Killua thought about it. Illumi was his designated alcohol provider until the start of the semester. Illumi's moral ambiguity prevented him from policing what Killua did and didn't do so long as he followed the family legacy. At Illumi's college house parties, he'd mix Killua's drinks and they were always the best damn things he ever tasted.

He never knew the name of them, though.

"I don't know the name of it," he confessed, tapping a finger to his chin. "It's sweet... kind of tastes like soda and coconuts?"

Gon straightened a little and said, "Must be a rum and coke. Come on—I'm paying."

Killua startled at the suggestion, but Gon was already walking up to the bar and bypassing the line. He hurried after Gon, saying, "You don't have to—!" but Gon already slapped a ten dollar bill into the frat guy's hand and said, "The best Malibu and coke you've ever made, my good sir."

The frat guy saluted Gon and said, "Can do, captain."

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