PART III - SOFI

We were rehearsing the death scene.

"I do remember well where I should be,

And there I am. Where is my Rosa?"

I could feel her fall to her knees next to me and she started to cry.

"What's here? A cup closed in my true love's hand?

Poison, I see, hath been her timeless end.

O churl! – drunk all, and left no friendly drop

To help me after? I will kiss thy lips.

Haply some poison yet doth hang on them,

To make me die with a restorative."

When I felt Helen's lips on mine, I kissed back and the room burst into laughter.

"You gotta stop doing that," Helen giggled, looking down at me.

"Did you know that they had to reshoot the scene where Amy kissed the Doctor several times because Matt Smith kept kissing back? I'm in excellent company," I tried to conceal my – repeated – mistake.

Lenny laughed and pressed another kiss to my lips. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Helen, you must know that the offer for a dinner with your dad still stands," Mom said during drinks in the living room. We'd never had drinks in the living room. I felt like being at the Gilmore's house for Friday Night Dinner.

"I appreciate that Chio, thank you."

"No problem. I wished someone had talked some sense into my parents when I came out."

Francisco stared at her. "You came out?"

"Ay, mi cielo," she said, "We don't need to talk about that."

"No, no, I wanna hear!" Francisco insisted. He looked at me, at Santiago as to wonder how all of this fit together. Lenny's face had the same curious expression.

I knew the story. Mom came to the US to study and she met a girl. They ended up living together in a small, shabby New York apartment, parenting two dogs. That is where the story becomes vague. She only ever told me "Then I got pregnant and moved to Augusta". She never clarified whether she cheated on her girlfriend or if they broke up and she had sex with a random guy to heal her broken heart. I just knew that whoever this person – technically my father – was, he was not talked about. She did, however, talk about the fact that her parents told her never to come home.

She sat me down a week before I was supposed to leave for Mexico, saying "she wanted me to know" but not giving me a choice whether I wanted to live with my homophobic grandparents or not.

I was angry at her for telling me after I came out to her – I convinced myself I would've had the courage earlier had I known. But then I realized that I had just unintentionally missed the clues. She never suggested I'd have a boyfriend but used the word "partner" instead. When I was younger I thought that was a fancy, grown-up word for boyfriend. She educated me about sex including queer sex at a scandalously young age and even though I was super uncomfortable at that point I think it was the right way. She told me that hating LGBTQ+ people had nothing to do with religion and everything with bigoted people. She told me to remember that love would always win over hate.