domenico left a while ago after we discussed some points of the plan, everything is good so far.

now all I am left with is to think of how to react to my mother's death, I am feeling way worse than I felt when my so called father died.

what hurts is she died unhappy....she didn't get the end she deserved or the love of her life. she never got to meet or talk to her daughter and had to deal with so much.

a knock on the door pulled me out of my trance and I said a little come in, not even a second later damon came in.

it's weird to call him damon but I will, he sat next to me on the bed and asked " wanna watch a movie or something?".

I really miss him but I am just not.... I want to think and settle on how I feel about everything.

he must've took my silence as an answer because he said "wanna talk about how you're feeling?".

he was always there to comfort me and always knew what to do and say, but I myself don't know how deeply I am broken and I am afraid to find out.

my eyes watered at the thought, he must've seen it because he put his hand on mine.

a feeling of comfort washed over me making me realize how much discomfort I felt all those months I spent with carlos.

a lump rose to the back of my throat and a sob escaped my lips making damon wrap his arms around me.

I held into his hands tightly and sobbed "I- I don't even know how I am feeling......I know I am hurt but I don't feel it as much anymore....I want to. but I am not!".

he rubbed my back and said "that's fine am, you're numb and that's normal.". I shook my head and said "he...he raped me and got me pregnant then beat me up till I had a miscarriage, I should feel more pain than what I'm feeling. I have his name tattooed on me and I can't stop thinking about everything but I feel empty. I hate it.".

he held me tighter and said " don't be harsh on yourself, what you went through is enough don't let it get in your present and haunt you. I'm not saying forget it, but thinking about it too much or wanting to feel more pain will only complete what he did.".

I sobbed again and said " I really don't know if I am capable of that, I will never be the same damon... I am not as strong as I was no matter how many times I try not to admit it.".

he put his finger under my chin and gently tilted my head up then said "you are am, you won't be the same because you're stronger, you didn't give in or accept what he was doing. you fought him! if that's not strong I don't know what is.".

he caressed my cheek with his hand wiping my tears and continued " you're strong am, I know the plan you thought of and that alone makes you stronger than anyone here. you're going to have a good life, you will do what you always wanted to do and we will go on that Europe trip we always talked about. you're free now, he won't touch you or be near you anymore I promise.".

his amber eyes shining and looking straight at my grey ones.

I nodded feeling a little better and said "can we not talk about it anymore please? I don't want to deal with it now.".

he nodded and said " what do you want to do?", I shrugged my shoulders and said " I don't really feel like doing anything. I will take a nap.".

he looked at me thoughtfully then said "you have one hour, you take a nap while I go get something and then we will go out.".

I frowned not sure if I want to go out or not, it's weird not being caged in a room after so long.

nonetheless I nodded.

-------------

"TADA!" damon said as he got in pulling me out of my trance, I really don't feel like going out.

I looked up to tell him that but couldn't help the laugh that escaped my lips. I expected him in a suit or something but here he is wearing a giant dinosaur costume.

he threw one on the bed and said "wear it we're leaving.", I looked at the brown fluffy costume then at him and said "where are we going?".

he gave me an evil smile and said "we will walk", I nodded and took the costume then put it on.

(this is the costume in case you're wondering why she didn't take off her clothes.)

it's weird to walk around in this, very...

I looked at him and he said "let's go", I followed him through the hallways of the mansion feeling like we're 16 again.

we did this before but with shriek costumes.

he held my hand and said "you know what time is it?", I shook my head then remembered what we did that year.

he began semi singing semi screaming "Barney is a dinosaur from our imagination, And when he's tall, He's what we call a dinosaur sensation.".

I couldn't help but laugh again and said "you're unbelievable.", he smiled and continued "Barney's friends are big and small, They come from lots of places, After school they meet to play, And sing with happy faces.".

he finished the song till we reached the gate, some of the guards looked weird because they are between keeping their laughs and keep a straight face while damon started semi screaming semi singing the lyrics again.

he started skipping still holding my hand and said "come on am!", everything I thought of disappeared and I just wanted to enjoy this.

what he said is right, going through what carlos made me go through is enough, I shouldn't let him get to my present or future. I will enjoy this and keep the plan and my thoughts out for a while.

I began skipping with him to which he smiled and we both continued the song together.