~ A Drop in the Ocean (Last Call)

was 6:51 PM and I sat in my car in the parking lot of Walgreens, pondering about how to approach this substantial evening. My heart raced without caution, causing my whole body to sweat. I brushed my sweaty palms off on my jeans, trying to relieve the stress that waved through my body.

I wanted to understand my feelings, to tear them all apart and come to the conclusion that would determine the rest of my life.

The letter Harold had written me had changed everything. I had been ready to break my rules for the first time since I invented them to move way before my ten years here were up. My plan had been to leave before the pain of the love I'd lost became too much for me to handle. Reading his heartfelt love, however, had changed it all.

I got instant whiplash after finishing off his words. He'd been so delicate with them, explaining his dream with such detail that I almost wished I'd experienced it with him. The difficult aspect to all this was trying to understand how it was all going to play out if I were to go to Ethereal in nine minutes.

Would we pick up right where we left off? Would we survive, after all? What if we end again, but permanently? What if whatever has been keeping us alive for this long wears off for only one of us?

It was all a bunch of what-ifs, but they held such a weight to them that it was hard to ignore their presence. I wanted to answer them, but I knew that it was impossible for me to do so. There was no way for me to be sure if this would all work out the way I wanted it to.

One thing I knew for sure, on the brighter side, was that I loved Harold. I loved him with all my heart and with all that was in me. My heart was his and there was no way I could ever take it back; even if I were to pull it from his grasp, my heart would never work the same way again.

Right then and there, I knew, I knew for sure that there was no way I was going to be able to walk away from this, no matter the fears, and survive. I had to do this because I wanted Harold. There was no other way around it.

I wanted him. Period.

My hands had understood that conclusion before it was even formed, for they turned the engine on and put the car in reverse. I drove in a haze of memories. He filled my thoughts and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I didn't even want to stop them. I wanted to see him laugh, hear him laugh, as soon as possible and this was the only way right now.

When I pulled into the lot of Ethereal, the clock had just hit 6:59 PM. There has never been a time in my life where I'd run as fast as I did then. My heart was out of control and my eyes had blurred with the tears of joy I didn't know how to control. My feet carried me to his office without my mind's knowledge. My thoughts were turned off, my body heated in such a way that I almost thought I was going to pass out.

The door was closed when I got there. Struck with fear, I looked at my watch; it was exactly 7:00 PM. I breathed, ridding of the fear that had almost taken over and opened his door.

And there he was.

He was standing with his back to me, looking out the major windows out to the beautifully lit city. He wore worn jeans with a plaid black and white shirt. His hands were in his pockets and he stood there gracefully, looking like the king of the world. And as I stood there in the doorway, admiring him from afar, all I wanted to do was to run into his arms and kiss him with all the passion that had been forced into hiding for the past few days. Yet, I was frozen. I couldn't make myself move, nor could I speak.

Moments later, nonetheless, he slowly turned with an inquisitive look. It was washed away as soon as his eyes caught me, though, and was replaced with delight as his lips stretched into that beautiful smile of his. "Baby," he whispered with a tone of relief as he proceeded to take long strides towards me. As soon as he reached the doorway, his arms wrapped around me, bringing me into a tight hug, one that I've been wanting since I left him on that day. I held him tightly for longer than I'd expected, but there was nothing more I wanted to do in that moment. There was such a comforting satisfaction that washed over my heart and suddenly, all was peaceful. Just having him in my arms built a wall around us, closing off the world from having any reach to drive us away from each other. There was no emotion stronger than how divine I felt in his arms.

When he pulled back, he looked at me with the brightest light shining in his eyes and I couldn't help the smile that lifted my lips. I reached to stroke his cheeks that now had grown stubbles. I wasn't mad, though; they added to his look that I already loved.

"You came," he said, his husky voice taking me back. I realized then that I haven't heard his voice for days. Days.

I shook my head at myself and put all my attention on Harold once more. He deserved it. "Of course, I came. I could never leave you."

His thumb caressed my chin, then my lips. "I was a ghost for the past few days. I lived as I'd done before you, but nothing was the same. I wanted you but didn't know how to get you back. It was hell."

Hearing him speak made my heart ache. I'd caused him so much pain and it was all because I couldn't wait a few days. He got his memories back anyway and I wasn't there to console him for it. "God, I'm so so sorry about that. I shouldn't have left like I did. It was reckless of me."

He chuckled, his hands cupping my face softly as his eyes looked at me dead in the eye, allowing me to see every single emotion that ran through every part him. "It was, but it's all over now, love. You're here and that's all that matters."

My eyebrows furrowed. "But-"

"-but nothing. I love you. All that matters to me right now is that you came back to me," he interrupted before I could get my pointless argument out.

I sighed, grabbing his arm as I realized that he was right. "I love you, too."

And with that, he leaned in, bringing our lips together with such passion that my knees almost gave out.