Lucas's POV

"I think there may be some complications with Amy now after all" Jay announced as we were having a little meeting.

"What's new?" Gio asked him.

"She's dating this guy Matthew" Jay said to us. "She's even staying overnight with him at his apartment at times"

"So? Wasn't she allowed to date anymore?" Carter asked.

"What have you found out about this guy?" I asked him leaning my head on hand.

"Well that's the part I was getting to. He's a dealer for a Matchbox clan" Jay informed.

"What the hell is that?" I asked. The name sounds like something from a child's book or cartoon.

"Its some backstreet gang that deals with small scale drugs; mostly heroin and ecstasy"

"So do you think she's back on drugs then" Gio asked.

"I didn't think so before she always seems drug free, but then this morning she seemed a bit drug worn leaving his apartment" Jay replied.

"Drug worn? I asked even though I think I pretty much knows what he meant.

"Like she's facing the after effects of a drug wearing off" Jay confirmed.

"I warned her about getting involved again before she left my car that day" Carter responded. "I told her what you had said"

"Its been a few months since, she has most likely forgotten about the warning and figure she has the perfect opportunity to start doing drugs again" Gio responded rubbing a hand over his chin as if he's getting an idea. "What better way to get your daily fix than to date the guy who can gets it for free".

" I should've known that letting her go and a simple warning wouldn't be enough to keep her away from those stuff" I said shaking my head.

"Just make sure she doesn't get too addicted and starts blabbing" Gio responded.

***

I messed up, I really did. How the hell could I have been this stupid? After months of being clean and avoiding the temptations, last night I slipped up and gave in. Sure, it may seems like a minor one but if I start indulging in the smaller things now, what's going to stop me from slowly going back to the more serious drugs and becoming an addict once again. It was now that the guilt of being so weak and easily persuade started kicking in more. It was so hard to get clean after being an addict for years and with help I was finally able to get over it. If Lucas ever found about this, I'm dead. He'd surely think I was liable to exposed his whole mafia secret that I knew about.

Ecstasy

That's what it was. The classic 'party' or 'love pill'. Last night I was staying over at Matthew's apartment, something I've been doing for about a month now since we first started sleeping together. Last night things got a bit steamy between us and then Matthew brought out the pills-ecstasy. Somehow he had managed to convinced me to take the pill along with him- it's use was mainly to supposedly amplifies sensations when one touches or caresses another, particularly during sex. At that intimate moment I of course was up to trying to intensify our moment and believe me it felt worth it at the moment but then this morning when I woke up and the pill had worn off it was like everything came crashing down on me. The guilt about indulging in a non prescribed drugs was eating at me, I got upset and fled Matthew's apartment after telling him that I can't do this anymore, with all the fresh after effect of the ecstasy pill still swirling around.

"Hey, earth to Amy" Nora called waving a hand in front my face snapping me out of my zone.

"Uh? Sorry what?" I asked shaking my head and shifting my attention to her.

"It's like you're on another planet" Nora said to me. "I was asking if I could borrow your charger"

"Oh yeah, its on my bed in my room" I said to her.

"Your mind seems really far" Nora replied as she got up from the couch heading to my room.

"Babe what's wrong? You've been quiet and like this ever since you got back this morning" Katie said concerned. "Did you and Matthew have a fight or something?"

"I broke up with him" I told her.

"What!? Why? What happened?"

"I don't want to talk about it" I said shaking my head before taking a sip from my coffee.

"Oh hun, I'm so sorry" Katie said as she came and gave me a hug.

"Yeah, its okay. I'll get over it" I told her.

What I didn't mention though was that I hope I could get over the guilt eating at me right now from knowing that I gave into temptations.

~|~

"Thank you beautiful. Can I buy you a drink?" A guy asked as I delivered his drink to him.

"No thanks, sorry not allowed to drink on the job" I smiled at him.

"Or we could hang out later after you're shift and get another drink then, what do you say?" He asked with a smile.

"I don't drink any at all" I said to him before walking off.

He's about the seventh guy that tried flirting with me here tonight, I was so over the flirty bar guys at the moment. I just really want to be alone right now, I was not in the mood for any company especially from any of the guys here.

"Another order of gin and tonic, a long island ice tea, a bourbon and water and a scotch" I told Katie as I place the tray on the counter.

"Coming right up" Katie nodded as she turned to get the mixtures together.

"Amy hey, I thought I'd find you here" I hears Matthew said as he came up to me.

"Matthew" I said in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

"I had to see you after you just left this morning like that" Matthew said to me. "Amy, what happened this morning?".

"Matthew this isn't the place to talk about what happened ago?" I said trying to keep my voice down.

"What do you mean its not the right place? We need to talk about it. What did you mean by you can't do this anymore?" Matthew asked keeping his voice low.

"Exactly that Matthew. I just can't" I replied.

"What happened? Last night we were good, we had a great time and then

this morning you can't do this anymore, you just want to be rid of me?" Matthew asked in disbelief.

"Matthew, I like you. I really do, but what happened last night with that pill... It can't happen again. I only just gotten clean from being a drug addict for years, a few months ago and..."

"You were addicted to drugs? You never told me about that Amy..."

"It doesn't matter now, I just told you. I'm trying to stay clean and being around you is a a lot of temptation and a huge risk. Last night I messed up when I took that pill with you and I can't let it happen again. So I'm sorry but as long as you're still dealing with drugs, I can't see you anymore" I said to him

"Here are the orders" Katie interrupted as she put the drinks on the tray. "Oh hi Matt"

"Hey Katie" Matthew nodded at her.

"Sorry" I said to him again as I picked up the tray. "I've got to get back to work"

"Amy wait..." Matthew called.

"I'm sorry Matthew" I said to him as I continued to walk away with the drinks.