∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎

ద ద 𖦊 ꪉ 𐀔 𐃸 ద 𖦊 ʊ

༒ ༒ ༒ ༒ . . ༒ . . ༒

༒ ༒ ᜊ ༒ ༒ ༒

༒ ༒ ༒

༒ ༒ ༒ . . ༒

༒ ༒ ༒ . . ༒

ద ༒

༒ . ༒

༒ . . ᰔ

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Let me be who I was before,

my mental health always matters more.

I'm slowly killing myself by making my mind sore,

I'm tired of hearing it speak, God, does it bore.

What do I mean by 'it', you ask?

-A pessimistic voice inside my head

that's what I refer to that's what I try to mask

or kill instead.

God wants me

to be

happy

and healthy

more than anything

else.

So, shut up and stay that way,

that's right I want you to go away

and realise that perfection is impossible you dumb clown, dumb elf.

Now you're locked away, stashed deep within my bookshelf,

like a cursed corpse, you're rotting, dying,

you were illogical and now without you, I'm flying.

You spoke your nonsensical nonsense.

What you lacked was logic and sense.

You made me overthink

and plagued me with paranoia,

when I'm about to be on the brink

of exams you yelled "imma annoy ya!"

Your expectations of me were unrealistic,

and if you're still here they still are.

In fact, everything about you is unrealistic,

you're just the devil stretching from afar

from within his locked chains,

during this holy month full of pains

both physical

and mental.

You were once so red

but now you're dead!

Ha! I bet you thought you were one of them, the pains I mean.

No, you were just a demon, a rat,

buzzing gnat,

worst I have seen

in a while.

But you were easy to kill,

now I smile

as I enjoy logic and normality.

Smiling in sanity

so happily.

I only fell into you because I stopped this - poetry.

Can't you see?

I could not go out for walks

and talks

due to imminent tests,

imminent conquests

My mental health

suffered because of this.

Because I stopped doing what I needed to do, this

I realise it retrospect, now.

And wonder how

I had reached such weird conclusions.

But then I realise that you are nothing but delusions.

Now, I am happy again,

am normal.

But I am scared of being alone and overthinking again,

being formal.

But then I remember that you were nothing.

A nothing I made something.

Now, I am worried for what I am meant to be worried for; my exams.

Now, I have realised how much I need self expression,

not self-slams.

Now, I'm stronger

and better

than I was before

but not morally like you wanted you boar.

Now everyone other,

mother, brother!

-Look how stress for exams has made me confident and outspoken,

look how I have risen I remain unbroken.

God helps me write these rhymes, and it is God I thank.

It is time to burn these times, to Hell it sank.

While I decided to hustle,

instead of barely move, barely rustle.

Now, if you excuse me, I've got an test to revise for today,

and since you're dead, you won't be taking my sleep this time, hooray.

Watch, as hope, my heart obeys.

Watch, how I attract sunlight rays.

How I attract success' attention,

and suspension's suspension.

No, more like God's might to kill

something that is not me, something like a drill.

A dead drill.

While I move on,

with peace,

and even thrill.

∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎

ద ద 𖦊 ꪉ 𐀔 𐃸 ద 𖦊 ʊ

༒ ༒ ༒ ༒ . . ༒ . . ༒

༒ ༒ ᜊ ༒ ༒ ༒

༒ ༒ ༒

༒ ༒ ༒ . . ༒

༒ ༒ ༒ . . ༒

ద ༒

༒ . ༒

༒ . . ᰔ

༒

༒