⚠TW: S3LF H4RM/SU!C!DAl ACTIONS!!⚠

Gon's POV

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I tapped my pencil against a book repeatedly, I was in the library. Alone. Killua had to do something while I had to study. I begged him for me to come with him, but he dragged me into the library to study for tests. I'm not exactly the brightest.

I sighed as I got up to walk to the bookshelves. I skimmed through the books resting on the shelves. Until something caught my eye. A book. About Love. I raised an eyebrow in curiosity and took the book with me back to my seat.

I sat there, staring blankly at it. I may be dumb, but I have a hunch about my feelings. I needed to make sure I was right.

I hesitantly reached towards the book and flipped through the pages. I'm not much of a reader so I skimmed through it, only picking up key words. My eyes widened more and more as I read more. I was now blushing, pretty red.

"I'm... in love? With Killua?"

It all made sense. The way I felt giddy around him, when I didn't mind kissing him, and just being by his side made me happy. Gah, why was I so stupid! The signs were all there! I love Killua!

I started smiling and felt really giddy. I felt the need to tell him. I knew I shouldn't waste anymore time since I've wasted time from the very moment I met the albino.

I jumped up, looking around the library to see if Killua came back yet. No sign of him. I ran out of the library, running through the halls as teachers yelled at me. I ran all around the school, but no sight of him. I turned around the corner and saw a tuft of white hair.

"Killua-" I started, but paused.

Killua was right in front of me.

Kissing someone.

Zach.

I felt my heart break. I felt betrayed. One, for him kissing my bully. And two, Killua not liking me back.

I spun around on my heel and bolted out the school, tears flowing down my cheeks. I could hear footsteps behind me and someone calling my name, but I didn't care. Killua was the reason that I was alive. There wasn't a reason for me to live anymore. Killua liked someone else, my enemy.

I ran, ran all the way to my house, slamming and locking the door behind me. I bolted up the stairs and into my bathroom, taking out the forbidden box and shoving it on the counter. Opening it, I took multiple sharp items out. I stared at it as I weeped quietly, the items waiting for me to make contact with my skin.

I wasted no more time. I dug the razor into my wrist as blood gushed out. I continued it multiple times all over both my arms until they were dripping in blood from my shoulders all the way to my wrists. A pained expression etched into my face. But I continued. I went to my thighs next. Gliding the sharp tools over and over again, until my whole leg was also covered in red liquid. A metallic scent stung the air. A small pool of blood was already on the floor, getting bigger and bigger as I sliced my skin more.

I was beginning to feel nauseous and dizzy. My throat was dry but my eyes were still dripping down, mixing with the blood on the floor.

My vision started to fade as I collapsed on the floor, soaking myself with my own blood. I was finally gonna be free. From all the hardships of the world.

'I'm sorry Killua. I'll watch over you, I love you... ' I thought before closing my eyes and blacked out.

A/N: Sorry it was so angsty, but I'm gonna upload another chapter since I didn't upload last week! It'll be less angsty, so please bear with me! I'll upload it in a couple minutes so, electricgay, out and will be back in a couple minutes! :)))