《The Dandelion System》Chapter 34 Final
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It was the day of the departure. The sun was out, the skies blue, cloudless, and it was fully spring.
"This is it," Oda said, a faint smile on her lips, "The end of The Dandelion System."
The end. It's funny now, when I think about the first night we met. Oriana spilling pudding on my gown and then apologizing countless times, Oda bringing me upstairs to change my dress and instead threatening me before begging me to help her with the Dandelion System. At that time I had thought she was spoiled and rude—oh, that's wrong: I still think that.
A smile must've tugged at my lips because Oda frowned.
"What are you thinking of?" she inquired, just like that day. Would it really be fine for Taraxac to have such an arrogant Queen?
"Nothing," I replied, but she only became more curious. "Just how different The Dandelion System is from what I thought it'd be, along with the contestants and Royal family."
"Better or worse?"
"Worse, of course. I didn't know the Princess was so demanding."
"Well, we won, didn't we?"
"Well, I didn't exactly expect I had to leave Taraxac with the Prince." Her scarlet lips curved upward into a full smile.
"Well," she imitated me imitating her, "this is even better." We both chuckled, although I felt a pang of pain in my chest.
I'm leaving, the moment is finally here. I'm leaving the Dandelion System, Taraxac, and everyone.
"I should be going." I turned to look at the plain carriage near the path leading into the woods. "Of course Otto is asleep when we say our touching farewells."
"It's better this way," she acknowledged, sighing. "I can't deal with his crying and begging for me not to leave him."
"I know what you mean," I agreed, thinking of the night Otto begged me to stay and I met Oscar for the first time.
Oscar.
"What are you thinking of?" Oda asked, and I gave her a small smile.
"Oscar."
There's silence besides the soft rustling of the wind, and we both stood motionless, thinking of him. I thought of the first time we kissed and the fear and horror I felt. I thought of the night he gave me the couch to sleep on and told me about his past. I thought of our last hug, wordless but understanding. I thought of his lonely figure, his want for acceptance, him thanking me for listening to him and accepting him. I thought of his love for me and my love for him.
He wasn't a monster at all.
I looked at Oda, whose expressionless face is still intact, but her lips were slightly parted and the muscles in her jaw are a bit more relaxed. I wondered if she's forgiven him—if she also thinks of him like I do.
"I'll be going," I said again. She nodded curtly.
I continued to stand there, however, and we both looked into each other's eyes without any motion of leaving. Today was probably the only day I would ever get along with her. Her pale eyes seemed to tell me something but I can't hear it because the carriage driver called out for me.
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"I'm sorry—l'll be right there!" I looked at Oda again and she sent me off with a small smile.
Wait, I want to say, wait, I didn't hear what you wanted to say. Like always, she doesn't hear me neither. She took a step back before she pointed her chin at the carriage, gesturing for me to go.
I walked slowly to the carriage, afraid that if I look into her blue eyes for even a moment more, I'd be so enchanted I couldn't tear myself away.
The carriage driver opened the door and I hoisted myself into it to see him sleeping against the wall of the carriage. Oscar—no, Otto. His face was relaxed, showing the world how blissful and pacifying of a sleep he is having. I seated myself next to him and pushed his white, feathery hair out of his face as the door closed.
The carriage started moving, first with the soft and slow pattering of the horses' hooves and then the fast sound of wheels turning. I'm really leaving.
"Karina?" I inhaled sharply in surprise but then turn around to see Otto's eyes opening. "Are we leaving?"
"Yes."
"The new place we will be living at—will it have a garden?" I smiled at his question.
"It will. Even if it doesn't, we can always make one."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"That makes me feel happier," Otto said. "But I don't know how to garden." I chuckled. Of course the prince didn't know how to garden.
"That's fine, my sister Catalina is good at growing flowers. She would love to teach you."
"Hmm." Otto's eyelids closed again. "Then I'll ask her to teach me how to grow dandelions," he whispered and drifts off. I smiled as I brush his hair with my fingers again. He knew his favorite flower too.
"Are they for Oscar?" I asked, but he was already asleep.
But I heard something else.
Someone calling for me.
It's been so long since I've heard it that for a moment I wonder if I'm dreaming—no, if everything is a dream and I'm waking up.
"Karlina!"
It sounded far away and nearly indistinguishable, but I know it's my name.
I removed the curtains and pushed my head out of the carriage window to see someone running after me. The princess—no, the new Queen. Oda.
"Karlina!"
I'm not dreaming.
I'm not dreaming!
I laughed as I see her run uncomfortably in her wide skirt, which billowed out in the wind, her hair loosening from its tidy updo, and her usually composed face contorting to shout at loud as she could.
"Wait—"
Her voice sounded even more far away.
I didn't think anymore—I have to hear it, hear what she never said. I turned back to the front and shouted at the driver.
"Stop the carriage!"
"What?" he hollered back.
"Stop!"
He slowed down the horses, but I can't wait. I kicked open the carriage door and jumped out, only to fall down. I pushed myself up and tried to stand up, but my ankle hurt and my chest was thudding. I turned around to see the princess coming closer. I scrambled up and limped towards her on one feet.
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"Oda!" Oda finally caught up to me and she panted heavily as she criticized me. "What were you thinking, jumping out like that? Look at you, you're a mess!"
"Same for you, Queen Oda," I said right back, and she steadied me when I stumbled. "I think I hurt my ankle."
"Why did you jump out?"
"I had to hear what you were going to say."
Her colorless cheeks were flushed and her hair continued cascading down as she smiled a pure smile. It was the first time I had seen her smile like that.
"Before that, I want to ask you if you really want to leave Taraxac."
I felt my chest tighten. She never asked me before. She simply decided for me, and I followed through with it. Like everything else. And like before, I was simply going to accept it. But did I really want to leave?
"I don't know." I looked down at our intertwined hands. "I don't know." I suddenly couldn't answer. Why did she have to ask me now—when I am already prepared to leave?
"Tell me," she said, her voice suddenly gentle, "what you really think of Taraxac."
What I really think of it? My mind went blank.
"Taraxac—Taraxac is a mess." My voice trembled. My throat tightened as I pushed the words out. "The palace is a mess. The capital is a mess. The Dandelion System is a mess. There are so many bad memories here—but, I don't know why, but I still love Taraxac. I love the land, and I love the people here. I love Oriana, Annabelle, and Aideen—and you." I suddenly began to cry.
Why is it that when she never cared about me I never minded, but now that she finally asked about my feelings I wished she didn't? I wouldn't have minded following her orders and leaving with Otto, but now that I am forced to decide, I can't.
I was ready to leave this place with its ugly, disgusting, unfading memories, and in a new place, make new memories with Otto—but now I'm not. I love this place.
It's the place where me and Oscar met—and where we fell in love.
"I don't want to leave Taraxac!"
I fell against Oda, my face in her shoulder, and this time she comforted me, gently smoothing down my hair like I did to her once.
"I don't want to leave any of you! I want to know if Oriana and her father ever reconcile, if Annabelle's wounds will heal, if Aideen can move on, and I want to be by your side when you rule! I want to comfort you when you are troubled. I want to be comforted too, when I remember Oscar at night and when I see dandelions and when it snows—I don't want to be alone anymore!"
"Karlina," Oda murmured, "I'm so sorry for making you carry so much by yourself. I'm so sorry for not realizing your feelings." I shook my head and sobbed more, her hair sticking to my wet cheeks.
"It's not you. It's not your fault—"
"Stay here."
I pulled my face away from her shoulder and looked into her eyes again.
"What?"
"Stay here. Please stay here, Karlina."
"But what about Otto?"
"I trust him. He has Catalina, doesn't he? We both trust them. It will be fine."
"But—" Oda cupped my face in her cold hands and looked at me in the eyes.
"Otto has changed, hasn't he? Don't you believe in him?" She released me and then smiled a small, almost melancholic smile. "I've always been trying to shelter him from the outside, from pain, from suffering, but I don't think I have to anymore. He was always stronger than I thought."
I smiled.
"I also need someone I trust in the castle. Now, as a Queen, I have more enemies than ever, so I need a friend."
"I'll stay by your side," I said. "I will never, ever, leave you."
"I didn't tell you, did I? I'm planning on giving up the throne once Taraxac is in order again."
"Giving up the throne?" She never told me anything of the sort. "Why?"
"Taraxac doesn't need a Royal Family. It never needed one. All families should be families, nothing more."
"I see."
"But it might be a long time before Taraxac regains order. It might be ten years from now, or it might be fifty. It might even be when I'm an old lady."
"I don't mind. I'll stay with you for as long as you need." She sniffled at what I say.
"You shouldn't makes promises that you will regret."
"I won't." We stared at each other for another long period of silence, just thinking about the future.
"And another thing, Karlina," Oda began softly, "I need to choose a proper resting place for Oscar now that he's really gone. I don't know him all that well—so I will need you to tell me what he would've wanted." Oda looked uncomfortable saying it, but I know it's because she finally acknowledges him as her brother.
"I'll be glad to."
"But the reason why I stopped you is because I had something to tell you," she stated.
"What is it?"
"I never told you, did I," she suddenly laughed, "what my true name is."
"Then tell me."
"You know the name."
"What do you mean?"
"You know the name better than anyone. After all, it's an ugly name."
"You don't mean—"
"Yes," she answers before I even finish, her smile growing wider.
"My name is—"
I opened my mouth, and we say it at the same time.
"Karlina."
***
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