"[Y/N]... The rain stopped... at last..." Scaramouche murmured, still in between consciousness and sleep. "The weather here... is awful... hm?"

The Harbinger caressed the pillow lovingly a few times before waking himself up. He glanced down at what his arm was around and realized that he wasn't cuddling the person he had in mind. Tossing the cushion elsewhere, he turned his head to scan around the tent.

There an upset expression on his face until his gaze landed on you standing by the campfire as you finished cooking a dish. You looked at the young man too, relieved to see that he finally woke up from his slumber.

"Good morning, my Lord."

"Oh... There you are..." He spoke groggily in his raw morning voice, sighing tiredly. "I thought you ran off somewhere... without my knowledge..."

Disregarding what he said, you displayed a dish, "I cooked a Teyvat Fried Egg. A quick breakfast for you."

"Is that so...? Hm..." He slumped back into his pillow, not forgetting to say a snarky comment. "I didn't know you were so domesticated... Cooking me food, you're acting as if you're my wife... It's a common practice among married couples in Inazuma..."

"Well, uh... Breakfast is a common practice all over Teyvat, sir..." You joked but got no laugh from him, a slight frown pulled down at your lips.

Scaramouche scoffed, "You are the poster girl for the phrase ignorance is bliss."

Averting your gaze away from the Harbinger, you decided not to say anything more and give him the food. Carefully, you walked into the tent and made your way towards Scaramouche. This was kind of a first for you, cooking a man his breakfast and then serving it to him.

As you reached the futon, you got down on your knees in front of him and presented the food (As well as fumbling with the chopsticks in the other hand).

The young man sat up, the left side of his hair had a few locks tussled upwards. He stretched his back, groaning quite deeply before yawning. Then, he relaxed and looked at you with half-lidded eyes.

"I can get used to this," He took the plate and chopsticks happily, his gaze falling to the food then right back at you.

"One Teyvat Fried Egg, sir." You leaned back. "Enjoy."

"Did you eat?" He asked.

"Yes, my Lord, I did."

The Harbinger reached out to you with a hand to pat you on the head, but something made you draw back. Scaramouche's eyes widened a bit from your sudden behaviour and you too were shocked by what you did. You've never refused a head pat, never. What Lumine told you was still echoing in your thoughts, eating you alive.

He looked deeply at you and in turn, you stared right back at him with the same attitude. It was like both of you were trying to communicate with each other with telekinesis, which wasn't the case, by the way. You didn't like it when he glared at you like that, it was starting to make you feel subjugated.

"What." You said boldly.

"Wow, so cold." Scaramouche goaded, rolling his eyes. "I was only trying to say thanks."

Hearing Scaramouche say thanks was a little out of character for him, but then again, showing such a spiteful attitude and avoiding his actions of praise was also not like you. But, maybe you were overreacting a little, after all, you weren't supposed to know about the secrets the Harbingers are keeping.

There was an awkward silence as he ate, you waited for him to finish his food and give you the first order of the day. You were sitting on your knees patiently, watching the young man elegantly work the chopsticks on the food and lift the cut-up egg into his mouth. You studied the way he chewed and swallowed, Scaramouche only gave you the side-eye.

While waiting, you were lost in your thoughts. You were thinking about what Lumine told you and you wondered if Childe really was telling the truth. It could be just one big scam. Since Childe is such a womanizer, it wouldn't be a surprise if Lumine was just another one of his temporary flings. He likes the Traveller, after all.

A few minutes later, Scaramouche carelessly handed you the empty plate and chopsticks for you to discard. Another thing that you didn't like from being his secretary: throwing out his garbage like some kind of servant. For some reason, you felt like you were being awakened, like you were coming back to your senses.

Was this treatment from your boss normal? Was any of this normal? Why were you only noticing this now? Did you really allow yourself to be treated this way? You didn't enlist into the Fatui just to be someone's maid. You were a soldier, you wanted to fight. All this time, you were only here to sit here and be pretty. As if you were forced to.

"Did you sleep well last night?" Scaramouche asked randomly.

"Yessir, I did."

You kept remembering that intense kiss you had with him, it hasn't left your mind since it happened. You had to admit, it felt nice, it felt loving in a sensual way. The way your mouths came together in unity and acceptance really seemed like you were one. The thin coat of saliva on your lips and the dance your tongues engaged in must have meant there was a deeper meaning to his actions.

Yet you kept remembering what Lumine told you early in the morning. You can still feel the pit of your stomach swirling with dread as you thought about the brainwashing accusation. It can't be real, right? There's no such thing as mind control, right? Was your big brother really a victim of these cruel experiments? Why won't he take his medicine?

Scaramouche got up from the futon, slid his feet into his sandals and made his way to the table on the other side of the tent. He ordered you to throw the plate and chopsticks into the fire, fold the mattress, and prepare for departure. You got to work immediately, pushing all of the existential worries into the back of your mind.

You tossed the garbage into the firepit and watched it dissolve into nothing. Next, you did the same thing as your morning routine: rolling up the futon, folding the blanket and tidying up the pillows. Finally, you took any Mora, food, and supplies needed, leaving nothing valuable for any Treasure Hoarders if they were to come back.

Scaramouche placed his hat on his head, the hanging objects swayed when he touched the rim to make sure it was on properly. With his usual attire back to normal, you felt like it was just another regular day. He was finally complete, hat and everything, ready to trip over his power.

"I see that the rain stopped," Scaramouche commented as he adjusted his hair, hat, and collar.

"Yessir, it's going to be a beautiful day today." You replied.

"I'm starting to hate the weather here."

You nodded as well, agreeing that the bipolar ecosystem in Liyue is quite extreme. One moment it would be scorching hot and then a few minutes later, there would be a thunderstorm.

"Let's go," Scaramouche ordered. "Today we will head to Liyue Harbour and look for the Wangsheng Funeral Parlour to meet a man named Zhongli. We will ask about Rex Lapis' Gnosis and the whereabouts of the Traveller. I don't know if he will cooperate with us, so make sure to be prepared for a fight."

"Yessir..."

Before leaving, you put out the fire and erased any signs that you two were here. You glanced around at the other ransacked tents and sighed in disappointment, wishing that the Treasure Hoarders were never on this earth in the first place.

•••

You were too busy daydreaming while walking. It's always long trips like these that make your own thoughts the only source of entertainment. Well, even though you did have your boss to keep you company, small talk between the two of you never really lasts long.

It's just silence, silence, and more silence. There are the occasional comments about the weather of all things, but nothing interesting. Being alone with Scaramouche without another adventurer in a one-mile radius is a little bit unsettling. You felt like he could just snap at any moment.

Your thoughts were cut short as your foot was caught between two rocks, causing you to stumble a little. Thankfully, you were able to keep yourself upright. What kind of Fatui member would be so easily taken down by tripping over a pebble?

"Watch out, you idiot. Your head is in the clouds." Scaramouche scolded, flicking your temple with his finger to snap you back to reality.

You jolted a little and rubbed the side of your head, the flick was a little too hard in your opinion. Still, you felt your face form into an upset expression. You were starting to hate the way he treated you.

While his hand was next to your face, he took a strand of your hair and held it for a second, before tucking it behind your ear. You stared at him with wide eyes. Then he pushed you away as if he just realized his own actions, the force almost knocked you to the side.

"Sir-?!"

"Don't."

What was that just now? What the hell? Firstly, he thinks it's okay to flick you on the face with his finger, then pull that lovey-dovey, corny, cliche move of placing your hair behind your ear and finally push you away like some sort of ragdoll? He's so confusing-!

You took a deep breath and continued walking as if nothing happened. Your emotions and morals were clashing together as if they were at war with each other. Perhaps what Lumine told you happened to open your mind to see reality.

Scaramouche cleared his throat, "I've had this question for a while."

"What is your question?" You began to panic, fearful that he had the power to read your thoughts.

He let the silence between the both of you go on for a little too long, "Don't you ever get tired of carrying that?" He motioned to the ice tank on your back.

You glanced away timidly, "Not at all, I've been trained to handle the physical strain of holding it for days. You know that, sir."

"Ah, that's right..." He nodded.

"Mmh..." You hummed in response.

Scaramouche tilted his head and the trinkets of his hat followed his movements. He crossed his arms in thought and finally spoke up why he asked that question in the first place: "I'm having second thoughts if you really do need that new rifle."

"I-I still want it."

"Whatever."

Was he always this cruel? Was he always this mean? The rumours around the Fatui basecamp in Snezhnaya were always centred around Scaramouche. At first, you never understood why he was hated so much. Scaramouche never liked people and people never liked him, you guessed.

But last night was so lovely. You really felt like he was completely different from the rumours. He was calm, cool, and charming. Even though he teased you for almost a whole hour, he never went over your limits. You felt that he never wanted to hurt you. That's why he didn't keep going. He didn't take it further than a kiss.

Or was that not the case? If Scaramouche had the power to manipulate, brainwash, or mind-control anyone to do whatever he wishes, what's stopping him from doing it to you? No one was in the area, it was just the two of you. Alone in that tent. Together in one bed. There could have been an instance where it did go beyond a kiss and you just couldn't remember because you were brainwashed.

How disgusting. How vile. That is the lowest thing a man could do to a woman. It's bringing tears to your eyes. Did you really fall asleep that quickly after the kiss? You were starting to feel sick. There was no way someone like Scaramouche would do something like that, right? He's not that evil, right?

You don't need to make up excuses for him, right?

"About last night..." Scaramouche began and his words died out.

"Yes...?" You dreaded that topic, already you were starting to feel lightheaded.

He stopped walking and you halted as well, lowering your gaze to the ground. You tried to focus your attention on something else to distract you. Below your feet was the dirt trail leading right to Liyue Harbour. To your left in the distance was a Hilichurl camp with dancing Hilichurls. To the right was a tall mountain. Behind you was just grass and stones.

In front of you, Scaramouche turned around and placed a hand on his hip opposingly. You felt sweat roll down the back of your neck. Either the serious gaze aimed at you or the boiling sun was making you feel intense heat, you were fearful of melting away.

"I think it's time to come clean," Scaramouche snapped.

You shut your eyes sorrily, "I have nothing to hide from you, sir..."

"No, I have to confess."

You finally had the courage to look at him. To your surprise, the Harbinger now had a guilty look mixed with anxiousness on his face. You saw the way he tensely shifted on his feet, how he clenched his hands, and the trembling of his lips.

You stuttered, "Confess...?"

"Yes, [Y/N], I confess," Scaramouche said earnestly, inhaling sharply and placing a firm hand on his chest. "My feelings for you go beyond our military relationship."

You felt your heart leap against your ribcage, hot flushes on your face, and overwhelming dizziness washing over you, "What...? I don't understand..."

He continued.

"The reason why I treat you differently from the others is because," Scaramouche paused for a second to think about his words, before huffing in frustration. "It's because I'm attracted to you... I am deeply... in love with you."

You just stood there petrified and speechless.

"The things we did last night were the result of me losing control over my urges," He admitted truthfully. "That's why I didn't say anything after that. I was ashamed. I didn't mean for it to go that far. I only wanted to lay there and sleep with you in my arms."

"My Lord...?"

"You hate me, don't you? After what I did last night." He muttered. "That's why you seem so distant today. Because I couldn't control myself."

The brainwashing. You felt out of breath, "N-Not exactly..."

"Then, what's wrong? What's gotten into you?" He coerced. "You've been acting different. Tell me right now."

The mind-control. You were developing a headache, "W-Well, I heard... that Mr. Childe... said-"

"Why the hell are you bringing up Childe?!" Scaramouche exploded angrily, making you wince in fear. "What? Are you going to tell me that you like him now?!"

"No!"

"Then tell me what's wrong!"

My brother's illness.

"Spit it out, [Y/N]!"

"Nothing is wrong!" You shouted back.

"I'm not stupid," Scaramouche's eyes showed signs of madness, his pupils shrunk sharply as he almost laughed. "Why do you think I'm stupid?"

You cupped your hands over your head out of distress, "This is all so sudden...!"

"It's not sudden. I've liked you for months, you've just never noticed." He bellowed. "Now you're starting to piss me off."

You looked at him meekly, "I-Is this supposed to be another test...?"

"No, it's not! By the Gods, you're so clueless! Why is it so difficult for... you to... understand...?" Scaramouche turned around quickly. "Who's there?"

Instantaneously, a body crashed into the ground right next to Scaramouche. You jumped in horrified surprise and grabbed your weapons out of reflex. The Harbinger looked down closely at the beaten person and could see that they were already dead. They dissolved into the wind, the body disappeared, only leaving behind a Fatui insignia.

Scaramouche tilted his hat up to look at the top of the hill and you too followed his gaze. You could see flashes of different colours and you could hear screams of pain, it was a surprise that you only noticed it now.

"M-My Lord, this could be an ambush by the Treasure Hoarders...!" You sighed deeply. "I think they're fighting with our comrades!"

"So, it seems." He agreed, anger dripping from his tone. "What annoying little pests. Let's get up there and put them in their place. I don't mind killing every last man there."

"Yessir!"

"[Y/N]," Scaramouche cautioned. "Just so you know, I am not done with you."

Without another word, you nodded tiredly.

Glancing at the hill, you dropped everything and got right to work, that confession can wait later. It was time to fight. Without delay, you began to climb up the tall mountain, scaling the stone walls and carefully calculating every step. Scaramouche followed from under you.

The sounds of fighting, swords clashing, and men screaming were growing louder and louder the more you climbed. At one point, another Fatui agent fell from the mountain and died on impact with the ground. You shivered at the sight of it, you were never a fan of heights.

Eventually, both of you reached the top with energy left to spare. The cold wind blew against your face, which tossed your hair over your eyes. Being up so high almost made you disoriented, dizzy, like the distant ground below was calling your name.

Immediately, you took your spray guns out of their holsters and stood in front of Scaramouche protectively. The two of you studied the battlefield, you couldn't seem to find any Treasure Hoarders, all you could see were Fatui soldiers fighting one sole person.

Scaramouche made his presence known, "What is going on here?!"

"Harbinger Scaramouche, there she is!" An Agent replied.

You gasped audibly as goosebumps raked through your skin.

Through the chaos of elements and bloody bodies of your comrades, you saw her again. The girl who you talked to this morning, the same person who claimed to have saved your and Scaramouche's life. It all came together and fell apart. The irony was almost painful.

Of course, because even a playboy like Childe can only have his eyes on one girl. The Traveller herself: Lumine.

😏