Louis's POV

So here I am sitting on the couch again waiting for Harry to come home but again that doesn't happen. He has been disappearing for long periods of time lately only coming back for a couple of hours each day and then he's gone and he doesn't even spend the night with me anymore. I never mentioned anything about it in the short period of time in which I get to catch a glimpse of my close yet so far away beloved because I just didn't want to waste a second of my now shortened bliss. The last thing that I recall each night, is me falling asleep on the couch, but somehow, I always woke up wrapped up in my warm sheets and laying in the comforts of my bed. My only guesses that it was Harry who has been doing that, but that left me wondering to why I didn't wake up next to him. That was probably the only thing that gave me a sense of closure; he came back to me at night. That was the only thing that I was holding on to, maybe Harry still loved me after all?

Hurt and disappointment overwhelmed my broken heart when I realized that it wasn't Harry who tucked me in each night, in fact, it was Niall his best mate. Did he pity me or something? Harry is too much of a nice person to come and straight out break up with me. Probably he wanted to do it the easy way; just gradually slipping more and more out of my life. Why? That simple one worded question always had a much longer and more complex answer which only leads to the devastation of many people.

Patience is a virtue. That factor is also important when a person is in a catastrophe. Jumping to conclusions leads to devastation as well and sometimes it's an incomplete explanation which leaves people with the everlasting heartbreak.

Should I ask why? A question that would relieve me but might break me if it wasn't what I wanted to hear. But I don't want to jump to conclusions either; I owe Harry a chance of explanation after all. How am I supposed to question him if I don't see him anymore? Seeing him requires me staying up all day and night so that I won't miss my chance of seeing my own boyfriend. It's clear really, I'm not sleeping today.

I've been lounging on the couch, my eyes following the clock's longer hand moving as each second passed leaving me more and more frustrated. After the umpteenth round of my eyes chasing the clock and my ear drums beating in rhythm with the ever so famous tick-tock, I hear the door open and slam shut. Harry is here.

When he entered the living room, he stopped walking and his eyes widened in shock when he saw that I was still wide awake. I took a proper look at him since I wasn't able to do that in so long, it was now turn for my own eyes to widen in shock. Harry has lost so much weight he was practically the definition of skin and bones. His cheekbones were more prominent now, no longer sexy as many people, including me, described it; they were unhealthy. His usually wild curls lay flat on his forehead making him look even more sick. His eyes were no longer the vibrant green that captivated anyone who would look at them, they were just dull and lifeless. And finally, my ultimate shock, his arms were littered with small and abstract looking black and blue spots.

My heart seemed to die a little and increase it's thumps at the same time. What had happened to him? What was going on? Why was I too blind to see his current state? He didn't look like my Harry anymore. He looked like a person who was walking around with no soul, just a moving body.

"Harry?"

"Harry what's going on? What happened to you? Where and why have you been disappearing these days?" And once I started with the questions, the next step in my painful procedure was to find some patience and wait for his explanation.

"Louis. Louis I..... I really don't know how to tell you this.... But I just want you to know that I love you Lou, I love you and I always will no matter what happens. I just want you to know that." His eyes held so much pain that I had to look somewhere else only to avoid seeing all this pain in the eyes that I adore oh so much.

"Harry you're scaring me. Just please, tell me what's going on Harry. I really want to know, don't you trust me?"

"Of course I do Louis, how could you think that?"

"I don't know what to think anymore Harry! I just want to know what happened that made you look like.... look like that." I gestured helplessly to his disheveled self.

"Louis I just..."

"You know what Harry fuck you! If you just want to break up with me and you don't want to say it, then I'm making it easier for you--"

"I have cancer Louis! I don't want to break up with you! If anything I need you the most right now. I was just trying to distance myself from you so that if I died you won't miss me too much. I didn't want to leave you hurt and alone. I wanted you to be able to move on, to forget about me. Although at the same time I don't want you to leave me and I don't want you to forget about me...." Harry whispered the last bit his voice cracking as he fell to the ground sobs racking his now weak body. I felt my heart drop to the pit of my stomach when Harry fell to the ground, and I felt my breath being knocked out of me when he spoke the first four words. Cancer. Harry had cancer. Although I promised myself that I wouldn't jump to conclusions, I accused Harry of the worst and all along his intentions were selfless and just pure heartfelt. He is the one who has cancer and he was only thinking about my state completely ignoring his own.

I immediately ran over to where Harry was crouched on the ground and I joined him there, wrapping my arms around him, and we just sobbed into each other's arms helplessly. I still wasn't grasping the thought. I still couldn't believe that the fragile boy in my arms was cursed with this horrible death trap.

"Is there a chance?" I think he understood what I meant when he replied with something which gave me slight hope that everything might be alright again.

"The doctor said that there is a surgery, and that there is a 50% chance of survival." Although it wasn't that satisfactory, it was still something and I was holding on to that.

"Then what are we waiting for Harry? You need to do that surgery, I can't lose you Haz, I can't."

"But... But Louis... I might not make it and... I'm so scared."

"I'm even more scared than you are love, but that's our only hope and we have to go with it. You're strong Harry, I know that you'll live. For me, for us. Please Haz." I pleaded desperately.

"For you Louis."

"Harry, please. I know that you're going to come back to me again, I'm sure you will." Louis said as he laid a gentle kiss atop of Harry's now bald head.

"Just remember Lou, I'll always love you, no matter what happens." The final words that were exchanged between the two lovers before the doctors wheeled Harry into the surgery room.

Ever since, Louis has been sitting in the same position silently praying for Harry to come back to him. Agonizing hours passed with no news about said previously curly headed casanova. If anyone asked Louis what was your worst experience, this one would be his first option hands down. All the sweet memories of him and his hazza bear were flashing all around his head making him laugh and cry at the same time, probably looking like a lunatic to an outsider, but he couldn't care less. He just wanted his Harry back and that was all he would ever ask for. He doesn't know what his life would be like if Harry, god forbid, left him. Probably these thoughts didn't want to evade his mind either, his miracle happened.

"Mr. Tomlinson, congratulations, Mr. Styles's operation was successful."

Louis simply felt like his soul was given back to him and he could almost feel his and Harry's heart synchronizing together in a blissful beat, although Harry was still unconscious. But that didn't matter, his Harry was okay and most importantly alive.

A/N~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm so sorry for the long wait. Excuse the shittiness.

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