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I was sitting with girls talking when dadu asked me to go to my room to assist Jahan. I diligently stood up. I was actually pleased with dadu interruption as the talks were now going toward my wedding night.

I opened the door of our room and walked inside. He was rummaging through closet.

At the sound of my pazaib. He immediately recognized me

"Main ap he ka muntazir tha. Idhar baitheye. (I was waiting for you. Sit there.) He pointed toward the bed.

I was confused but I did as he asked. He walked up to me and then set down beside me on the bed.

He pulled my right leg up and placed my right foot on his lap.

"Kiya kar rahe hai? (What are you doing?)

He unclasped the pazaib and placed it on the side table. "Ab ainda ap ye ni pehne ge."

"Magar Q? (But why?)"

His finger lightly traced the area where the pazaib was clasped. His touch and voice oozed with proprietorship.

"Mujhe ap k badan pe kisi aur mard ka lams ya uske de howe cheez ka lams bardasht ni. ( I won't tolerate another man's touch or that of something given by him on your body.)

"Wo apke cousin hai. (He is your cousin.)" I tried to justify.

"Cousin or brother. It doesn't matter to me much. Ap mere biwi hain. (You are my wife.)" He staked his claim on me.

I kept sitting there digesting his possessiveness while he stood up and walked to the closet and started looking through it again.

"Main dekh date ho." (I will look through it.) What is it?" I walked up to him.

"Ni bs...." He paused for a moment. "Mujhe zarish ko shukria k tor pe koi tuhfa dena chahye. (I should give Zarish a gift in gratitude.)"

"Shukria. (Gratitude)" I paused then asked. "But for what?"

He pulled out the sheer red lingerie which was now hanging from his index finger. "In sb k liye. (For these all) but I like this one more."

"Oh... "

He raised his eyebrow in teasing manner. He took hold of my wrist and pulled me toward his chest.

"Ahhh..."

My hands were now lying on his chest with my head down and his arms wrapped around my waist.

"To main souch raha k hum q na apne wedding night ko recreate kare. (I was thinking about recreating our wedding night.)"

"Wo kaise... (How?)" I immediately shut my lips after that stupid question left my mouth.

"Wo eise begum k ..... (It will be like wifey that .....) He leaned his face toward me. I tried to move backward but his grip on my waist tightened not giving me much room to move.

He tugged me forward so that my body was plastered to his. I could feel his warmth and every single edge and curve of his body. His lips were right next my ear as he whispered those arousing words that left me speechless.

"Ap mere bistar pe is red garment ko pehne howe mere intezaaar kare ge. (You will wait for me on my bed wearing this red garment.")

He lips enveloped around the tip of my ear as I stood there stiff taking his sheer seduction. He sucked on it and pulled it out with a pop.

I moved away a bit maintaining some distance. His pupils were dilated. "To main muntazir raho eik haseen raat k liye. (Should I remain awaiting for a beautiful night.)

I parted my lips not knowing what to say. The question kind of slipped from my mouth as I slowed down my breathing.

"Ap dinner pe ni hoge. (You won't be at dinner.)"

He sighed pulling out a black velvet coat from the closet. He slipped his arms through the coat.

"Ni."

He walked to the dressing table and picked up cologne and sprayed it on himself.

"Kidhar ja rahe hai ap? (Where are you going?)"

He buttoned up the sleeves and turned to me. "Just to a gathering with Taya abu and Agha jan."

"Lekin apka waha kiya kam." (But what would you do there.)

Those gatherings filled with feudal politicians. Everyone knew what kind of gathering they were with open bar and female dancers. He walked up to me until he was standing one step away.

"Begum. Ap jante hai k log mere eik minute k liye taraste hai." (Wife. Do you know that people crave for my one minute.)

I knew about his importance in elite class and business world. He had been getting awards since five years for the best businessman in Pakistan.

"Mat jayien. Mein ni chahte k ap jayien. (Don't go. I Don't want you to go.)" I pleaded softly.

"Main Agha Jan ko inkaar ni karsakta. (I can't deny Agha Jan.)"

He whispered softly turning his back to me. He walked two steps away. I didn't want him to go. I didn't want him to walk on that path. This one would the first one but them there will be more. The desperation pulled those words out from me.

"Agar ap ruke gaye to main us garment me apka intezaar karo ge jaise ap chahte hain." (If you stop then I will wait for you in that garment like you want.")

He turned on his heels looking at me with a glare daring me to say any further. "Aur agar na ruka. (And what if I don't stop.)"

"To kam se kam aj k raat mujhe se kuch expect na kijeyega. (Then at least Don't expect anything from me tonight.)

I dared to say those words with my chin held high looking in his eyes without any hesitation

"Kiya tum mujh se apna soda karahe ho? (Are you bidding yourself to me?)"

His jaws were clenched with his lips in thin line. His honey orbs reflected disappointment.

"Mein bs ap ko rokna chahte ho. (I just want to stop you.)" I looked down not being able to meet his eyes.

He gripped my chin in a strong hold forcing me to look up into his eyes.

"Koshish mat karo. Koi faida ni. Aur ainda aise harkat mat karna. Tumahare ijaazat ho ya na ho mere tum pe har lehaz se haq hai. Samajh gayi." (Don't try. It won't be fruitful. Don't do this act again. With your permission or not. I have right on you in every way. Understood.)

I could only nod my head with tears gathered in my eyes as he shook his hold off my chin.

"Kiya ap party join karne lage hai? (Are you going to join the party.)"

I looked at him needing to know the answer but he gave me nothing but just a kiss on my temple as he whispered "Take care" and walked out of the room leaving me once again with feeling of rejection and defeat.

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Walking in a room filled with mostly politicians and some of businessman with a bar in corner and a stage with women dancing. I would be lying if I said it was something unexpected.

Taya abu introduced to many important names in politics of Pakistan. I was standing beside the bar studying the people.

"Jahan Shah."

The man sitting on the bar stool beside me tipped his head in an acknowledgement.

"Malik Ahmar."

I was introduced to him not so long ago. He was an emerging politician with many supporters. He didn't join any party but was fighting as an azad umeedwar.

"Piye ge. (Would you like to drink.)" He slid a glass of whisky toward me.

We Shah's did drink a bit on occasions but never enough to get drunk. These parties were those occasions.

"Shukria." I declined politely. I mostly kept away from drinking even through I have seen Taya abu drink a bit on occasions. I pulled a cigarette and ignited it. I took some small drags.

Baba was also part of the party once. It was formed by Agha Jan decades ago. The party was one of well known in Pakistan with Taya abu as president. Agha Jan wanted Baba to be a part of this too but Baba not wanting to be part of this lifestyle left it and paved his way in business.

"Bare qistamat paye hai apne. (You are very fortunate.) You are being chose as an candidate for CMs position at this young age."

His words were not anywhere near praising but were filled with mocking.

I looked at him with no regard as I took a long drag of smoke. "Ab har koi Jahan Sikander ni hota (Now not everyone is Jahan Sikander.)

I walked away excusing myself from this awful party to go to my dear wife who must be very upset with me. I could understand her concerns but I couldn't deny Agha Jan. I never did and I gave him my word. My beautiful wife would have to support me.

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I set up on bed opening my lids. The blinds were set aside letting the room glow in the light golden light of winter sun. The chirping of birds gave a soothing touch.

My eyes immediately sought the place next to me. It was empty but the rumpled sheets were sign of his presence. I couldn't tell when he came home.

I could hear the gentle splash of shower from next door. Some time later. The showered turned off as there was no sound anymore. I could even hear the rustle of towel as he dried himself in this pin drop silence.

I heard the crack of the bathroom door and my eyes immediately flew to that place. He walked in with only a towel wrapped around his waist giving me glimpse of those sturdy muscles of his chest. I immediately looked down, playing with the kara on my wrist to distract myself from that particular image.

I heard the opening of closet and rustling of clothes. A bit later, I heard his rich Baritone voice. The first voice of this fine morning. He was now dressed in polo shirt and jeans.

"Main ne suna hai k apne raat lo kuch ni khaya. (I heard you didn't eat anything last night.)

"Bhook ni the. (I wasn't hungry.)" I mumbled.

"I don't want you to be weak so try not to skip your meals." I nodded my head.

He walked to the bed and set in front of me. He pulled the duvet off my body and lifted my right feet placing it on his thigh.

He clasped a gold Pazaib with ghungroo in it on my ankle. "Mujhe support karege. (Will you support me?)

His finger started to trace my ankle in a teasing manner. I tried to pull my feet away which created a sound of chan chan.

"Ni."

"Q?"

I pulled my eyes toward his face and stared right back at those honey Brown orbs. "Main apka anjam jante howe kaise apko support karlo. (How could I support you knowing your outcome.)"

"Jaaniya. Biwi shohar ka libaas hote hai. To ban jaye mera libaas aur mujhe bhatkane se rokliye ga. To kare ge mujhe support. (Wife of garment of husband so be my garment and keep me from straying. So will you support me?)

He took both of my hands in his own. I nodded my head.

"Shukria." He kissed each of the knuckle of my hand.

"Magar meri kuch sharayat hai. ( But I have some conditions.)

"Farmayen." His index finger traced the inside of my fingers. This simple act was causing shudders in my body.

"Ap kabhi sharab ni piye ge. (You won't ever drink alcohol.) "

"I don't drink already."

"Ap apne ankhey bhatakne ni dege.(You won't let your eyes wander.)"

"Jaan-e-Jahan. Ap se ankhe hatege to bhatke gena. (My eyes will wander when they will move away from you.)"

He turned my hand and kissed the inside of wrist whispering in a low husky murmur against my skin.

"Aur."

"Ap kuch illegal ni karege. (You won't do anything illegal.)"

"Theak hai. Ab nashta karle warna dandha hojaye ga aur apne walima k liye teyar bhe hona hai. (All right. Now should we do the breakfast otherwise it will get cold and you have to get ready for walima too.)"

We had a pleasant breakfast in the balcony with him being as attentive as before about filling my plate or the glass.

After that, he left the room with a small goodbye as beauticians entered in. After shower. They pulled me in front of dressing table where they started to prepare me for today's function.

After countless hours. I was ready in a pinkish silver maxy dress with heart shaped neckline and nude makeup and hair in a down bun. My duppata was around my arms.

Jahan came in room with a knock. He was wearing a black pant suit with white shirt. No tie and first two buttons unbuttoned. A half opened pink rose in his front pocket of jacket.

He wrapped his arm around mine. We walked down spiral staircase decorated with lilies and pink and white roses. We walked from the veranda to the door into the garden where function was held.

The whole place was had white chiffon strips hanging from the chandeliers in middle made of pink and white roses. There were vases of flowers of themed roses at every table. The stage was also decorated with roses.

We walked to the stage and set on sofa. The function passed with me being introduced to many people of society as Mrs Jahan Sikander Ali Shah.

I made small polite talk with frequent polite smiles. Through the function. The fear for the unseen future didn't leave me. Jahan may be the man of his words but history has shown that even steadfast has fallen when drunk in drug of power. I only could pray to Allah for he was the only listener.

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