______________________________________

Allah Akbar

Allah Akbar

The heart easing voice of azaan sounded from multiple speakers adding a symphony in otherwise silent room. My soul instantly felt the relief.

I stood up from dewaan where I was sitting half sleep and half awake. My eyes instantly fell on the figure lying under the sheets. My heart instantly felt a stab of pain. I couldn't make myself lay in same space as him knowing that he was upset.

I pulled the shawl the only shield from the dry cold of lahore foggy winter away from my body. I walked in to bathroom and performed my wudu. I wrapped the chiffon duppata around my head tightly.

I walked in to the room and took out the prayer mat from the cupboard. After that I placed the mat in the direction of qibla.

I made the neyat for fajar and started reciting ayats in my heart. At the end of my namaz. I raised my hands for duaa. My heart soared for Allah's help. His guidance. I didn't need to speak the word or part my lips. My heart told every little secret that I held in the deepest corner. It told him my fears and my concerns and asked for his help. His solution as it was the best.

At the end of duaa. I skimmed my hands on my face as I recited durood shareef.

I was about to stand up when a baritone voice suddenly made me stoic on my place.

"Tumhe namas ni parhne chaheye. (You shouldn't pray namaaz.)

"Q?" (Why?) I asked meekly in a whisper not understanding why he would say something like that.

I heard his footsteps as he walked up to me. He stood by my side but I didn't look up at him. After a moment of silence, he replied in a mocking tone.

"Qk begum. Allah un aurto k namazee qabool ni karta jo apne shohar ko deny karte hai." (Because wifey. Allah doesn't accept the namazee of those women who deny their husband)

He walked into the bathroom saying those hurtful words. The tears pricked at corner of my eyes. Allah mere namazee qabool ni kare ga. (Allah won't accept my prayers.) How he could say that. I never used to pray until I heard the news of our nikkah. It was the first time that I prayed and asked Allah for betterment and mercy. After Abba's death when he wasn't here. These namazee were my sanctuary. I took sanctuary with Allah the merciful and mighty. Now he is telling me. My only sanctuary won't answer my prayers.

He was passing by my side when I took hold of the end of his right hand sleeve. He stopped but didn't turn around. I tugged at them once and then twice.

"Jahan." He took a deep sigh at my call.

"Kuch kehna hai?" (You want to say something?)

"Ap ne mujhe hurt kiya hai." (You hurt me.) I whispered meekly in a small voice holding on to my tears.

He turned around and stopped low until he was sitting beside me. He pulled my chin up with a bit force and met my eyes.

"Aur jo tum ne mujhe hurt kiya hai. (And that you hurt me.)"

My lips trembled as I whispered. "Ye mere intention ni the. (It wasn't my intention.)"

I looked away not being able to meet his eyes. "I didn't mean to deny you. Mein________ bs (I________ just)."

"Kiya?" (What?)

I looked down at my lap and started playing with my fingers.

"Mujhe ap se hoaf ata hai." (I am scared you of you.) I said those words in a very low whisper that could be heard barely.

"Mere tarf dekho." (Look at me.) I instantly looked at him.

"Wajah?" (Reason?)

"Itna rude rehte hai mere sath aur phir youn dekhte hai k jaise abhe kha jaye ge. Mujhe to lagta hai main apko ache he ni lagte. (You are always rude with me and you look at me like you will eat me up at this moment. I think you don't like me.) And what else I am supposed to think given our history."

I rambled on until I noticed the dimples across his cheeks that I never noticed before as I only saw him smiling for the first time and then he actually laughed.

"Per mera irada apko khane ka he to hai begum. (But my intention is to eat you up wifey.)"

He leaned toward my face with mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Huh!"

He pulled me on his lap with the same bright smile.

"Ohh janna."

At the moment, I realized what he meant and my cheeks heated on their own. I wasn't unaware about the relation between husband and wife. I had my fair share of novels to understand some of the innuendos.

I tried to move away from him but he wrapped his arm around my middle pulling me to his chest.

"Shhh.. relax."

His finger tugged the duppata of my head slowly and I immediately grew stiff. He carelessly threw it on floor. He tugged the hair band and pulled my hair down. His fingers combed through my hair up and down in rhythm. It was actually relaxing.

"Ab ap k is dar k bhe to kuch karna hai. (We have to do something about this fear of yours.)"

He skimmed his nose up and down my neck. My breath hitched and then he did it twice and thrice. It felt like he was inhaling me.

"Mhmmm....I like your body wash." He spoke in my neck. After forth or fifth time when he repeated this my body stopped being stiff.

I relaxed. I laid my head on his chest. I started feeling drowsy with the constant rocking, the fingers combing with rhythm of the nose skimming against my neck.

"Neend arahe hai." (You are sleepy.)

My lids were half closed. "Ji, so ni paye pore raat. (I couldn't sleep whole night.)"

"So jayie. (Sleep.)"

His only word was required and my lids dropped. Before falling to deep sleep. I felt myself being elevated and dropped onto something soft and comfy.

"Barbaad karke chore ge mujhe. (You will destroy me."

A pair of something soft like petals skimmed against my temple before I felt myself drop completely into deep sleep.

◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼

The hard noise of thud thud on door pulled me out of my sleep. I instantly shot up pulling away the arm that was holding me to the bed. I didn't have time to study the men lying by my side as another loud knock was produced on the door.

I placed my feet on the cold marble floor and stood up. I took the duppata lying across the floor and draped it on my chest before walking to the door.

I unlocked the door and pulled the door open to find Zarish apy standing there with her hand raised in a fist ready to knock on the door again.

She scrutinized me up and down and then like she come to a conclusion she said.

"It looks like by your state that nothing happened last night." She added further. "Wase mujhe ni lagta tha k Jahan itna patient hosakta hai (By the way I didn't think that Jahan could be this patient.) "

"Zarish apy." I couldn't believe that she could talk about something like this so casually.

"Hum dono shadi shuda hai. (We are both married.) Its no big deal. Eik do saal me dekhna tumhare bhe sare sharm chale jaye ge. (You will see in one or two years all of your modesty will be gone.)

"Ji." I could only look at her with my lips parted wide in a state of haka baka.

"Acha. Ab apne miya je ko jagao sb nashte pe intezaar kar rahe hai." (Now wake up your husband. Everyone is waiting on breakfast.)

I closed the door behind her and turned on my heels. I found Jahan sitting on bed with his back leaning against headboard. His hand covered his yawn with all of his hair messed up. It was the most casual of him making him look less intimidating.

"Acha howa ap jagaye. Nashte pe sab hamara intezaar kar rahe hai." (Its good that you are awake. Everyone is waiting for us on breakfast.)

He pulled off the covers and pushed himself out of the bed. He walked in to the bathroom running his hand from his hairs to his neck.

I took out a simple white shalwar and kameez for him and laid it out on bed. I looked through my clothes in closet trying to find something.

He took out a red simple chiffon anarkali frock with churri pajama and placed it in my hand.

"Ye pehne. (Wear this.)"

I took the frock and walked into bathroom. I got through the basic needs then changed into it.

I walked out of the bathroom to the dressing table. I pulled my hair in a low bun and used some of the makeup. He walked up to me and stood behind me in front of the mirror.

He pulled my hair out of the bun so they were falling to the middle of my back. I pulled some strands behind my ear.

"I am thinking if I should let you wear red again or not."

I looked up at him in the mirror. The intensity with which he started at my reflection had me tearing my eyes away.

I turned on my heels still maintaining a bit of distance. He stretched his wrist for me and pointed toward his cuffs. I buttoned them up.

We both walked to the stairs. At the start of the stairs, he took my hand in his own and intertwined our fingers. I looked back at him and tried to tug my hand out of his but he just raised his eyebrow giving me a mischievous challenging look.

We walled to the dinning table. I covered half of my face behind the curtain of my hairs feeling incredibly embarrassed.

"Aslam Alikum."

"Aslam Alikum." My greeting followed his in a small voice.

"Wailum Salam." Everyone answered after Agha jan.

He pulled a chair out for me before pulling one for himself and sitting beside me.

Tai ami called the servants and they started placing dishes on the table. Every one started filling up their glasses and plates.

Jahan filled my glass with juice before filling his own. He placed some omelette with a toast on my plate before moving to his own. Everyone stared at us forgetting about their own meal.

Zarish and Sehrish apy who were sitting across from us looked at me with raised eyebrows and teasing smiles.

After a second everyone started their meal. I felt embarrassed whenever Jahan would place something on my plate or fill my glass and I would get that teasing look from my cousins. He did it so casually like it was an everyday thing.

"Ap chiryoun ki tarhs khate hai." (You eat like sparrows.) He muttered under his breath noticing my plate was still filled. I wasn't famished. I couldn't eat anymore. After that he placed a pore with some halva on my plate. Now there were two toast filled with raspberry jam. I somehow ate the first one but I couldn't even look at the second.

He didn't pester me to eat more and after breakfast we all retired to veranda. I set beside dadu while other set on sofas and chairs. The tea was served with biscuits, cake rus, mathai and halwa of different types and nimko.

The ladies were sitting together having tea and chatting while the male sitting around. Some of them were having tea but Agha Jan was having huka while Jahan and Taya abu were sitting with Aghan jan smoking cigarette and discussing things.

The two jawai son in laws were sitting with pappa and phuppa discussing something too while having tea. Later Hassam joined them too.

"Beti."

"Ji dadu."

She took my hands in her wrinkled ones and pulled out two gold kagan embedded with stones from the small bag beside her. She pulled each one on my wrist. Everyone remained quite with their attention solely on us.

"Ye Jahan k biwi k liye rakhe they maine. Jante ho main jante the k woh ap he hogi. Mujhe acha lage ga k agar ap ise haveli me ye pehna kare ge to." (I kept them for Jahan's wife. You know that I knew that it would be you. I will be pleased if you keep wearing them in Haveli.)

I nodded my head and took her hands in mine kissing the back of it before pulling them to my eyes.

"Acha ab mere bare." (Now its my turn.) Tayi amy came toward me with a blue box. She opened it. It had simple diamond earrings. "Its from me and your Taya abu."

"Shukria tayi amy." (Thanks) I took it from her and kissed the back of her hand in respect.

Next came mummy. She passed me an envelope. "Its from us. Open it."

I opened it and there were some tickets. I looked up at mummy.

"Honeymoon tickets to Sicily with booked hotel room."

My eyes immediately caught his who looked at me with smirk and a glint. I looked down with my mouth closed feeling embarrassed not knowing what to say. I pulled her right hand and kissed the back of it whispering shukria.

After that came phuppo. She gave me gold necklace.

Next came Zarish apy with a pink coloured shopping back. She placed it beside the other gifts and whispered in my air.

"Ye honeymoon pe kaam ayege. (They will be helpful in your honeymoon.) My cheeks immediately heated and when I looked up. I found Jahan looking at me observing my every reaction.

Next came Sehrish apy. She placed a bag beside the other gifts. "I bought some designer clothes. I looked at them and I thought that they would suit you."

I said a small thank you with a smile. Next came Sana. She gave me bag and placed it beside the other. "I bought limited makeup set."

"Thank you Sana."

At the end came Hassam holding a smile on his face. He set on his knees in front of me and pulled out a gold pazaib from his pocket.

My eyes immediately found that of Jahan. He didn't look very much happy with those frown lines.

"May I?" He pointed toward my ankle.

I immediately looked at Jahan who gritted his teeth in anger. The distaste was clear on his face as he glared at the back of Hassam's head. He purposely stomped his boot on the the cigarette. Everyone could notice the tension except Hassam himself.

"I can wear it by myself. Thank you Hassam." I immediately said before he could even touch my foot looking at Jahan who relaxed a bit after I took the pazaib from his hand and clasped it around my ankle.

He looked at me with a confused look which became knowing one when he looked back at Jahan.

Hassam and I were friendly being childhood friends but I didn't think that Jahan liked it much. I already took notice of his possessive nature but I didn't know that I was going to know more of it in future.

◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼◼