cr: somewhere on tumblr lol

Everyday Derek wakes up and thinks of the same thing. He wonders why Y/N is still with him when he's probably the worst mate out there. Sometimes Derek even wonders if Y/N is only going to marry him because she's Derek's mate –not because she actually loves him.

"Derek, is everything okay?" Y/N asks from beside Derek.

Y/N has just woken up but she already knows how today is going to go. Sure, Y/N and Derek's wedding is right around the corner but Y/N knows that Derek is constantly thinking about their relationship. She's tried so many times to comfort Derek but nothing seems to help.

"Derek?" Y/N repeats.

For a second she thinks about her relationship with Derek and how much they've been through. Y/N often questions if it was all worth it because Derek has become so distant since they found out that Y/N was his mate. Of course Y/N didn't have the same bond to Derek that Derek had to Y/N but she still loved him just as much.

"I'm fine," Derek replies plainly, like he does every time Y/N asks.

Y/N sighs and turns away from Derek. Every day it's the same thing and there's nothing that Y/N can do if Derek doesn't want her help. She knows how much Derek has been through and she understands Derek isn't always going to be the happiest person alive but he's never happy.

"Do you still love me?" Derek says, almost whispers, from the other side of the bed.

Y/N rolls back over to face Derek and avoids making eye contact. "Of course I love you, Derek. I love you so much that it hurts and it hurts because I have no idea how to make things better between us."

Derek doesn't know what to say back and his seemingly permanent frown is still there. "I don't deserve you –you deserve to be happy, Y/N."

"I am happy, Derek. I want you to be happy because it's clear that you aren't."

"It's just –I love you so much, too much probably, and I just don't want you to leave," Derek tells Y/N, his voice breaking towards the end.

Y/N sits up and shuffles closer to Derek. She places her hands on either side of Derek's torso and pulls him closer, allowing Derek to rest his head against her shoulder. It doesn't take long for Derek's eyes to leak a tear or two onto Y/N's shirt.

"I won't leave, I promise," Y/N says softly as she runs circles over Derek's back.