《butterfly; tsukishima kei》21

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there was times when tsukishima wouldn't mind facing a challenge. to him, winning or losing isn't a big deal. as long as he think he did his best in that situation, he's satisfied enough. but as he ran underneath the crying sky, his body refusing to move even more. he was at the edge of giving all of his best, all of his energy and tears.

running towards the hospital and hurrying towards her room, he felt like the whole world crashed on him. he stared at the beaten figure of his mother, laying unconsciously on the bed. his brother crying silently beside her as he lifted his head up upon hearing his footsteps approaching.

"what happened?" he blurted out, lost in thoughts as he felt like breaking down at seeing his mother suffering in a situation like this again.

"dad happened." his brother mumbled while holding the hand of their mother tightly.

tsukishima felt like another planet crashed on him. he felt like his heart dropped into his stomach, leaving him stunned and frozen on his spot. he took a step backwards and turned around, his fist making contact with the wall in anger.

"kei! that's enough!" his brother shouted at him, but he didn't stop. he was frustrated, stressed, mad and guilty. all emotions mixing up inside him. he shouldn't have left her. he shouldn't have come to tokyo today to visit you. he should've stayed with her today, then maybe he could've protected her this time.

it took a couple of minutes for him to calm down as his brother let out a sigh of relief, "punching the wall wouldn't solve anything."

"you should've hold him back." tsukishima greeted his teeth as he didn't turn around towards his brother, who just stared at him in guilt.

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"you know i did." he mumbled and sat back on the chair while tsukishima was left with his thoughts.

not wanting to face or accept the reality that's in front of him right now, he stepped outside the room. at that moment, he saw a figure entering the room beside theirs. he didn't pay much attention and just went towards the seats outside. tsukishima wasn't the type of person to let out his feelings or emotions. he wasn't good at expressing them in actions nor words.

so if he ever did, it was because he was left with no choice.

and at a situation like this, he's helpless. he buried his face on his hands as he felt the tears escaping his eyes. 'how lame' is what he thought to himself. he never would've thought that this day would come sooner than he expected it to be.

he heard the sound of a door opening and the presence of someone sitting beside him. then followed by quiet sobs and sniffs coming from his right. he lifted his head up and his eyes widened at the familiar figure sitting beside him.

how twisted fate really is somehow surprised him. it made him laugh sarcastically at how you always show at the perfect moment. he always wonder why is it you? what's so special about you? why is he so attached to a normal girl who he just finally noticed in the train station?

why is love so confusing?

he hated it. he hated how you made him feel. he hated the fact that he's feeling an emotion he wasn't sure how to deal with. he hated how careless he has become ever since his mind has been occupied by you.

he hated it, yet it won't change the fact that he likes you.

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and loving you would be much harder, but definitely worth it.

"crybaby." he mumbled and he saw how those eyes he adored a lot stared at him, confused and broken, lost and frightened.

he hated how he couldn't do anything to comfort you.

"tsukishima..." your voice was a lullaby to him, but it was a painful one to hear. with pain and sadness lingering in the tone of your voice, he could hear the sound of his own heart crying.

then you brought up your hand towards his face, gently wiping the tears away. but just like yours, it was nonstop. you both knew how broken you two are just from the shaky hands that came contact with each other.

"i'm so tired." you said with a forced smile plastered on your face, your eyes releasing more of your emotions that tsukishima wish he can take away. but even his own sadness, he couldn't do anything about it.

"life sucks at some point." he mumbled and chuckled sarcastically as he looked away, staring back into the door of the room.

"my mother's in a life or death situation and my father could be held by polices right now. sooner or later, he'll meet the court and who knows, maybe fate might twist things again." tsukishima couldn't help but let out the anger and bitterness building up inside him.

"we're messed up." he muttered under his breath followed by a curse.

"my aunt's unconscious for a week now. my father got fired from his job and i've been doing part-time jobs after school. my aunt's sister started blaming me again for everything that's happening right now. she said that i'm suffering the way my mother suffered back then."

your voice cracked, "we're really messed up." you trailed off at the end.

two broken souls who was believed that they might heal each other's wounds.

but it just happens to be that they're just breaking each other even more.

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