《Daisies》2.7
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"We didn't get the chance to become what we wanted to be."
• • •
I wish he would just talk to me.
Recently things have just felt.....off with us. Not bad but it feels like something unavoidable is brewing.
I stare from the passenger seat at his messy hair, broad shoulders, and large frame while he walks out of the bank. I wonder what he's thinking. Our insignificant argument from this morning lingers in my mind. It was so stupid I don't even remember why it started, or why we've been acting like this.
He gets back in the car, quickly shutting the door and driving off without his seat belt on. Mmm. I bite my cheek, keeping my comments to myself, to avoid starting an unnecessary fight.
He's driving fast, nothing new. I feel the car shift quickly when another car turning out of a store cuts us off. Jacob slams his hand on the dashboard, loudly blowing the horn. I can tell he's trying to catch up with the car by how he's increasing his speed.
"Slow down!" I tell out, gripping onto the sides of my seat. Other cars on the street begin to blow at us as he drives recklessly.
"You didn't see him fucking cut me off?!" He says gesturing to the car angrily but slowing down nonetheless.
"What the hell is wrong with you?! Who gives a fuck if they cut you off, it's not worth dying over!" He looks over at me as if I said something wrong. Which only starts to piss me off even more. He then starts laughing, but I can tell it's not a happy laugh.
"You always are in a shit mood, you know that?"
He abruptly changes lanes, turning onto the highway. He drives calmer than before but still too aggressive.
"Oh so I'm the one who's been in a bad mood lately? Just me?" I say referencing to his attitude over the past few weeks.
"Don't try to turn this on me."
"Turn it on you? Here we go again because you never do anything wro-"
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"Don't start with that dumb shit again. I didn't say that!" He yells.
"Well what were you saying then?!" He takes the next exit and I finally realize where we're going. "Wow, so now you're mad and you wanna take me home?"
"Yeah I'm taking you home, I don't have time for this shit. I've got too much to worry about; if you wanna be mad for no fucking reason, you can do it by yourself." He turns on the radio. I turn it back off.
"You always do that! Somehow it's my fault that I'm angry?! Your gonna take me home then apologize then we're gonna make up in the middle of the night cause that seems to be the only time you want to talk to me, then we're gonna start over. I'm not doing this shit again, either talk to me or leave me alone!"
"Oh my fucking..... here we go with the dramatics! You're never gonna talk to me again, huh? Are you really?"
"I'm dramatic but all you do is huff and puff and mope around then when I ask you about it act like nothing's wrong. It's like every conversation we had about being more open is thrown out the window."
"I'm not doing this with you." He groans, turning on the radio again.
"Why not? I'm not trying to argue, if you would just talk to me." I turn down the radio again, his grip on the steering wheel gets tighter. He takes a deep breath. We come to a stop light. His phone starts ringing.
"Yeah?" He answers sternly.
I look out the window, not paying attention to his conversation. I start to feel bad for dealing with our problems in an unproductive way. Maybe I should be more patient. But how much patience can one person have.
Sometimes I feel like I'm in a one sided relationship. Sure he's there physically but emotionally there's a wall. The only emotion he seems to be willing to express is anger. How does he expect me not to be frustrated?
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My head hurts from the yelling, my heart hurts from the silence. I want to cry but I refuse.
"And who the hell let that happen?" He replies, in an irritated tone. He looks over at me then lowers his tone.
We get closer to my house, I stare out at the now familiar streets. I wish my cousin was here, Avery always knows what I should do. I need to call her. No. I don't know. Why isn't there a handbook on how to deal with these things.
We pull onto my street and he's still on the phone. I sigh, knowing this won't be resolved today. He pulls in front of my house and I step out of the car. I walk around to his side.
He stares over at me, telling whoever is on the phone to hold on. There's so many things I want to say running through my mind.
"Bye." Is all I can seem to get out. He says bye to me and drives away quickly. My chest tightens. Gloominess consumes me as I walk into my house.
• • •
"Wait so good many people are going to be there?" I ask, walking alongside Mya.
"I don't know, maybe like 10 people. Jacob won't be mad if there's guys there right? I mean it's just a movie, not like I'm setting you up with anyone. Plus it's a big group of people." I instinctively roll my eyes at her thinking Jacob would be jealous of anything I do right now.
"Mya. I'm not even sure he likes me right now. He dropped me off yesterday and I haven't talked to him since. I texted him this morning." She drops her jaw.
"Don't say that! Let things calm down between you two, then reach back out." I hate when she makes sense, especially when I'm trying to be irrational.
"You're right. Fine, tomorrow works. I have to help my mom with these flower arrangements tonight anyways." We walk out of the building to the parking lot.
"Can I help? I don't wanna go home but I have nothing to do." Mya pouts, making me giggle.
As we get closer to my car I see two men standing by it. One man is on the phone, while the other inspects the car. They both have on suits, I don't know whether to go back inside or see what they want.
"Do you see those guys by my car?" I ask Mya. She looks over at them suspiciously.
"Yeah, what are they doing?" She begins walking aggressively towards them and I have to pick up my speed to catch her. "Can we help you with something?"
"Are you Ms. Jones?" One of the men asks, the other man walks up beside him.
"Who's asking?" She questions again. Both men pull out badges.
"I'm detective Davis, this is detective Miller. So I'll ask again, are you Ms. Jones?" My heart drops.
"No, that's me. Can I help you?" I answer before Mya gets herself in trouble. What do they even want from me?
"We need to bring you in for questioning about an incident that took place about 3 months ago," they look over at Mya then back to me, "We'd prefer to do this down at our offices."
"Am I being arrested?" I ask confidently even though I'm scared shitless.
"Not at the moment, but if you don't come with us now I'm sure we can arrange that for a later date." Detective who identified himself as Davis says, his tone frightening.
"Ok, ok. That's fine, I'll follow behind you all. If that's ok."
They nod their head then get into their car. Mya looks at me worriedly but I don't want to get in any trouble so I tell her thank you and get in my car. Confused and scared, I follow behind them.
• • •
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