I had just gotten up and was dusting myself off when the sound of running footsteps almost scared the actual pee out of me. I was completely done with people pushing me around today. The person attached to those footsteps was getting my jeep key to the cornea.

As soon as the footsteps reached the corner of the building I closed my eyes and started swinging my purse wildly. And I was rewarded by the feel of my purse making contact, followed by a deep grunt.

My eyes flew open, readying my purse again as I searched for my assailant.

"What in the everloving fuckballs is in that purse?! Do you tote around bowling balls for fun?"

My purse fell to the ground as I wiped my eyes. No freaking way.

"Theo?"

"The one and only." He looked me over as he rubbed his head. "First things first. Are you hurt?"

I opened my mouth to speak, but the words dried up on my tongue as I finally noticed that Theo was shirtless. So he took my silence as permission to continue.

"Never mind. You'd probably just lie about it anyway. Just so you know," he set his piercing eyes on mine, "I know that you were hurt before you got to work. And I can tell your hurt now."

My eyes narrowed. "You do realize how stalker-adjacent you seem right now, don't you? Did you follow me? And also, how dare you? You know nothing about me. And I owe you absolutely nothing. So you can just take your stupid six-pack abs and your stupid gorgeous face and leave me alone. Better yet, you can tell the rest of the Yummy Clone Quintet that I don't need Knights in shining armor. Aggravating butt cheese, the lot of you!"

If I wasn't shaking I would've made a grander exit. But instead I almost toppled over trying to retrieve my purse from the ground.

An arm caught me around the waist before I completely face-planted.

"Aggravating butt cheese. I'm going to have to tell my brot-, I mean the Clones, all about it when they get here."

"YOU CALLED THEM?!"

He looked at me as if I ate crayons instead of coloring with them. "Of course I called them. You were attacked. More than once today, apparently. And I'm still pissed about that."

Before I could rip him an entirely new back door, someone called my name.

The first Clone to my side was Thane, followed closely by Trey and Clone number four.

Four was… well… imagine, if you will, that you were five years old. And you had a father that you knew loved you, but continued to look at you as if you were constantly in trouble and he was constantly disappointed.

That dad was Four.

He wore his hair short, military-like. The black t-shirt he wore stretched over his broad shoulders and tapered down to a narrow waist. A buffer carbon copy of the others. Mostly. Four had a slice of brown in the iris of his left eye.

And I couldn't help but stare at it.

"Theo, did you break her?" Thane placed a hand on my shoulder.

"Possibly. She wasn't really making much sense. Something about butt cheese."

That brought me out of my Clone-induced trance to glare daggers at Theo, who was giving me that smirk that should be illegal. "I swear, when this is over I will find you. I will find where you sleep. And I will hide a million leeches in every pair of tighty-whiteys that you own until your gigglestick can't even smile anymore."

Theo just looked at me with his mouth hanging open. Trey and Thane were trying to control their laughter. And Number Four, who I really needed to learn the name of before I asked how Tris was, just looked at me with wide eyes. Like he was trying to figure me out.

Good luck buddy.

"First off, I do not wear tighty-whities. Second of all-"

"Second of all no one cares. She got you. Now man up." Number Four placed a finger on my jaw and turned me to face him. "So what happened?"

I ignored Theo grunting in annoyance. "I was walking to my car when Dookey grabbed me. Then a wo-"

Yeah. Tell him there was a huge wolf thing that saved you. Might as well just tell him you want your straight jacket in soft pastels.

"Then a what?"

"Then I bit him and he figured out that I am not even remotely worth the trouble. Ran out of here like a coward."

Every one of the Clones eyed me with suspicion.

So I eyed them right back.

Theo, of course, was the first to break the stare-off. "What is Dookey?