Awkward.

That's how I can describe our afternoon. Lexie and Julius had a bit of a fight because Lexie got mad he let me drink. I did say that it was my choice and Juls had nothing to do with it. But Lexie being the mom of the group, had to be mad at someone. They already made up, but the tension is still there.

It also doesn't help the fact that something happened between me and Vera.

We all woke up a few hours earlier and the first thing that hit me was my throbbing head and the memory of last night. No one has said anything about it, but I'm sure they all knew as we basically made out in front of them. Vera also hasn't said anything but the brief glances she's been giving me indicated that she wants to talk with me.

Do I regret drinking last night? Immensely.

I went against my morals and did something my father would do, get drunk on alcohol because he couldn't handle his problems. And that's basically what I did.

But a part of me is somewhat thankful for last night's distraction as it took my mind off of Professor Peterson even just for a while. The heartbreak of the rejection.

Although, I could've used a better and I guess, the sober kind of distraction.

There is a question in my mind that has been bugging me though.

Do I regret the kiss Vera and I shared?

To be completely honest, I enjoyed it. It was my first time being kissed and even though I expected my first from someone else, kissing Vera felt good. It was something I just saw in movies and read in books, I've never thought that I would get to experience it, and I did. I was just drunk and the memory is a bit hazy.

I could say that I regret getting my first kiss while I was not in the right state of mind and so was the person I kissed. More so, the fact that I didn't get to share it with the person I like and have actual feelings for.

And despite the fact that I enjoyed the kiss, the guilt in my chest has been eating me up. The first time the kiss almost happened between us, I managed to stop it due to the fact that I felt like I was betraying the person I like. And now that it actually happened, the guilt grew ten times more.

Who in their right mind would kiss someone else just because they were rejected?

It's also not just about feeling like I betrayed Professor Peterson, it's also about me kissing Vera who still has lingering feelings for me. Feelings I can't reciprocate. I don't want what happened between us last night to get her hopes up and break her heart once again.

I don't want to hurt her even further. I'm already an asshole enough for sharing a drunken kiss with her.

I handled the rejection wrong, chose a wrong decision, became reckless and impulsive, and I did something that would hurt someone, but it's something I can't run away from. It's something I have to face.

"Hey," I greeted the older woman nervously who gave a timid smile, she was already preparing to leave, probably to go back to her apartment. "Can we talk?"

"About last night?" I nodded. "Sure. Walk me to my car?"

We stayed silent all the way to the parking lot, stopping in front of her car. I kept on fidgeting, tapping my foot against the floor and going through my head about how I should go with this without sounding harsh.

"I-I'm sorry," Not a good way to start but I was never good at conversations like this. "I'm sorry for kissing you-"

"I kissed you first." Vera cut me off with a smile.

"You wouldn't have if I didn't asked a-and besides, I reciprocated."

She hummed. "You were drunk, it was a playful question, I took it seriously."

"You were drunk too."

Vera chuckled lightly, and I don't know what she finds amusing in this situation. "Stop trying to make me feel good, Aide. I know it was a mistake, on both our parts. It shouldn't have happened."

"I wasn't trying to make you feel good-"

"Aiden," she made me look down at her. "It's okay. I already know what you're going to say, so save me the heartbreak and stop beating around the bush."

With trembling lips, I spoke. "I'm really sorry, Vera."

Fingers placed on my chin, lifting my face up from looking down. "You don't have to be sorry. It's not your fault. We were both drunk and it was a decision we both regret, so let's not dwell on it anymore, okay? I don't like seeing you sad."

I nodded, wiping my cheek with the back of my hand.

"I have a request though," She smiled slightly. "Can I have one last kiss?"

"But I don't want to hurt you."

She chuckled. "It's okay, please? Just this time, then let's forget this ever happened."

Contemplating in my head, I felt defeated when she looked at me with pleading eyes. I didn't how I could make it up to her, but if this is what she wants, giving it to her wouldn't hurt.

Closing my eyes, I pressed my lips against hers as gentle as I can. It wasn't the same kiss we shared last night, it was sweet, innocent. Just our lips against each other and not moving.

When we pulled apart, I felt another set of eyes on me. I looked over, seeing a familiar back and curly dark hair already walking away from us.

And I know who it was.

"Good night, bud." I tucked the kid in his bed and went downstairs to where his mom is, who may I mention has been acting odd ever since I came here to hang out with her son.

No darling, no smile, nothing. It's like I'm a stranger.

Her actions are odd as usually after spending time with Aaron and it would just me and her, a conversation is what would we be doing. It's not like her to act so cold towards me. Aside from that day I still don't know the reason of.

"Are you mad at me?" I finally asked Professor Peterson. I couldn't take the silence and atmosphere anymore.

"No, Aiden." She answered firmly, eyes glued to her laptop.

"Is this about my confession? Because I thought we're still good after that. I swear I'm not expecting anything."

"No, it's not."

"Then why are you not talking to me?" I could see her patience getting thin by the way her jaw clenched. But I just can't let her treat me this way. I have the right to at least know why she's acting so different with me.

"Because I'm busy, can you please stop with this already?"

There are times when I forget she's my professor, this day included. So without hesitation, I spoke my thoughts. "How can I when you're clearly lying? Look, if this is about my confession to you, just give me time. I'm trying to move on."

She scoffed. "Moving on includes kissing another girl?"

My eyes widened at that. So she did saw Vera and I yesterday. But what's with the reaction? She's mad because of that?

I wanted to say something, but the fire in her eyes prevented me from saying anything. Besides, I don't really know what to say, not after receiving such anger.

I jumped slightly when she closed her laptop a bit too harshly and gave me a look I couldn't quite decipher. "You want to talk? Alright, let's talk."

Maybe insisting was a bad idea.

"I don't get you, Aiden. You told me you have feelings for me just a few days ago and I see you kissing someone else not even a week later. Is that how you like someone? After being rejected you just jump into another woman's arms? Do you really like me or was I just some infatuation for you? Was everything you said about me meaningless afterall?"

My brows furrowed at the accusation. "Then I don't get you either. You rejected me, broke my heart, told me I'm just a friend to you and now you're mad because you saw me kissing someone?"

I saw the way she faltered, an emotion I couldn't name crossing her eyes briefly. Her mouth opened to say something but no words came out. And I took the chance to say whatever it is on my mind.

"I'm not good with any of this shit and the way you're reacting is confusing the hell out of me. I don't want to assume anything because you made it clear that you don't have any feelings for me. But please, just this time, be honest with me."

"Do you like me, Amayah?"