They were inseparable, or rather, she refused to separate from his side because of she did then he might disappear and she would would die if he left again.

Terra was nothing without him, and if she had to cling to his hand as a small child would then so be it. She was far beyond caring what other people thought of her.

She just wanted to be near him, be reassured that he was still alive and breathing. She didn't have time to be embarrassed when she was on cloud nine.

It was what kept her happy and smiling as she rode that blissful wave of Finnick being there in her arms with a baby on the way.

It was why it was so difficult to feel the drop when it finally came to her, feeling that dumped over her like a bucket of icy water that drenched her over and dragged her back with nails scrapping the floor, screaming her protest his wide eyes and mouth wide open.

It didn't make sense to her. She could see the sentiment reflected on the faces of those around her.

"You're not serious!" She demands, lips curling in disgust at Coins dead set expression.

Johanna screams something unintelligible as she tries to keep her mind from buzzing. It was a dining sound that ticked on endlessly, blowing her vision. Finnick's hand was a steady weight on her back.

See, bringing back the Hunger Games just to punish the citizens of the Capitol, forcing them to watch as their children were murdered.

It wasn't... she hated them. She hated all of those in the Capitol that had just watched and encouraged as we were forced to fight and kill each other — but they wanted to drag more children into it, innocent children that couldn't help where they were born or what they were being taught.

To force that sort of thing to continue... how could she even suggest it?

"No. I should also tell you that if we do hold the Games, it will be known it was done with your approval,although the individual breakdown of your votes will be kept secret for your own security," Coin tells us.

"Was this Plutarch's idea?" asks Haymitch.

"It was mine," says Coin. "It seemed to balance the need for vengeance with the least loss of life. You maycast your votes."

"No!" bursts out Peeta. "I vote no, of course! We can't have another Hunger Games!"

"Why not?" Johanna retorts. "It seems very fair to me. Snow even has a granddaughter. I vote yes."

"So do I," says Enobaria, almost indifferently. "Let them have a taste of their own medicine."

"This is why we rebelled! Remember?" Peeta looks at the rest of us. "Annie?"

"I vote no with Peeta," she says, not meeting Johanna's searching gaze.

"No," says Beetee. "It would set a bad precedent. We have to stop viewing one another as enemies. At thispoint, unity is essential for our survival. No."

Coin nods, turning to Finnick and Terra and she feels her stomach drop, completely unsure of she wanted to say. A hand curls to rest on her stomach.

"Where are Marium, Cornel and Wilber?" she asks instead, focusing on them as she tries to justify the part of her that wished to say yes. "Don't they get a vote?"

"They've already cast their votes."

Her jaw clenches. "When was that?"

"When I brought the debate to their attention earlier this morning. I did not wish to disturb their mourning."

Her stomach sinks and she grasps at Finnick desperately. "Mourning for who?"

Her face is unapologetic as she speaks. "Cornel lost his life to one of the pods. The day that we one the war."

"And you didn't think that this was something that I would want to know?" Terra demands, lurching forward in her seat. "I'm sick of you thinking you have the right to do what you want with the lives of others! I vote no. A firm no."

Finnick pulls her back. "I vote no. No more violence."

"We're down to Katniss and Haymitch," says Coin.

The girl has a distant gleam in her eyes, a faraway look accentuated by the dark bruises from lack of sleep, from night terrors and grief. "I vote yes...forPrim."

"Haymitch, it's up to you," says Coin.

A furious Peeta hammers Haymitch with the atrocity he could become party to, but can only feel the sinking of realization that this was actually going to happen. It's up to Haymitch because he would be the deciding vote in the end. Wilber and Marium had voted yes.

"I'm with the Mockingjay," he says.

"Excellent. That carries the vote," says Coin. "Now we really must take our places for the execution."

As she passes, Katniss holds up a glass with a rose. "Can you see that Snow's wearing this? Just over hisheart?"

Coin smiles. "Of course. And I'll make sure he knows about the Games."

"Thank you," Katniss says.

Terra breathes deeply, sick to her stomach as she looks around the table. She stands easily, shoving people away from her. "I hope you're happy. When you see those kids dying, I hope you realized that you'll be the one that put them there."

"Come along, my heart, you have to be ready for the execution."

That's right, she muses, Egeria was waiting for me, the other council members were waiting for me. She might not get her shot at Snow, but she got everyone else that truly mattered.

The ones that really hurt her in the end. It was a promise that she had sworn and she had such a long list.

But that doesn't stop her from turning back as she leaves, people rushing in around her keeping a wide berth.

Casually, with vindictive words burning on her tongue, she meets Katniss' dull gaze over her shoulder. "I wonder how old Snow's granddaughter is? Around Prim's age, I bet, maybe a little younger. I hope you enjoy your show, oh wonderful Mockingjay."

Her flinch is all she wanted as she finally lets Finnick lead her fully away, the world settling again as he fills her with bliss.

It would all hit hard later, the pain that had followed her since her first games would only come back with a vengeance, but it was worth it all for now. It would all be fine in the end, no matter how terrible the world around them came to be.

Terra had survived three different Hunger Games, after all. She was a goddamn hero.

People moved in a flurry around her, pulling and prodding as they readied her quickly, and she feels her hair being pulled up into her buns, set perfectly even on either side of her head. They dress her as the innocent lamb she had once been, at the very beginning, a mockery in a skintight morph suit that reminders her that she was being paraded around for show once more -- but this all worth it. This was to be the end of the killing, the end of the blood that would stain her hands.

Katniss can have her ridiculous arrows. They were far too impersonal, but her hammer... her hammer was real, it was there, personal, and she could see the light leave their eyes after that sickening crack sounded.

Her hand fell to her stomach once more, touching the flat expanse as she wished there was some sort of sign.

She had been a Capitol weapon, a Capitol toy, at one point, before she was rescued. She had been like Peeta had been -- in a terrible state used to discredit the rebels. Would Katniss have voted differently if they hadn't of been saved? If she hadn't have made the deal?

No. The girl might like to play the role of selfless martyr, but no one was ever so good at heart. Terra could recognize how greedy she was.

It was clear in her demand to kill Snow.

She wasn't the only one hurt by him, and she wasn't even the one that was hurt the most.

Katniss could be just as bad as Snow and Coin, it seemed. If she was known sooner, then she wouldn't have risked her life for the girl. She would have killed the girl herself.

"Are you ready?" Finnick asks, looking quite handsome despite the plain grey outfit they had put him in. He was going to match the other Victors now as they stood with Coin.

She felt so off in her skinsuit, still grey, only a little darker. She had volunteered herself, after all, had sworn to the masses that she was going to kill the guilty herself.

That fact only made her feel numb and distant.

Katniss is silently standing at the side, waiting for her turn, but Terra doesn't acknowledge the girl as she steps out into the cold winter sunlight, hammer a comforting weight in her hand.

The cheers are loud, almost deafening, but it's not lost on her how different this is from the tribute parade.

Her steps are steady as she approaches the line of six tied up before her. Her stomach twists. This was an execution, but she wasn't going to kill an unarmed human tied back. It was despicable.

"Release them," she says, voice sharp, leaving no room for argument. "This isn't a slaughter. Let them go one at a time. Let them have a chance to defend themselves."

The soldier at her side says something, no doubt relaying the message to Coin. She can see the nod allowing her to do it her way clear as day.

The first one is released, an older man with hands that shake. They give him a spear, one that looks like it could have been made specifically for Enobaria. He has no clue how to use it, but he comes at her anyway.

Terra smashes her hammer up into his chin before he can shift his hold on the smooth steel. He crumbles in an instant.

The second is Snow's daughter, or perhaps his daughter-in-law, but she takes the spear in her hand when it's given to her, holds it loosely at her side, unmoving, and Terra can see the defeat in her eyes. This woman didn't deserve to die and Coin was a monster.

Her hammer swings hard, catching her with enough force to snap her neck as smoothly as possible, but she wasn't as frail as the old man and she staggers first before she tips back. Dead.

The third is given a hunting knife and he's fast and knowing of how to use it. Terra gets a cut to her arm before she catches her hammer on the side of his head, bashing him twice, and then a third time because she could before he lands in a bloody heap.

Four is old, and five pleads for mercy. They both die with swift, precise movements.

And then it's her and Terra gets sadistic pleasure from watching as they hand Egeria a long whip, something that would hurt her more if she didn't know how to use it properly. She knew the councilwoman didn't know how to use it.

"This is very much like you," Egeria says, voice shaking. "You love to make a show."

Terra grins. "Well, no matter how much I might hate it, the fact can't be helped that you turned me into a killer."

"Oh, no, that was all you."

"Then this shouldn't come as a surprise."

Her attacks are lazy, slow and open, taunting, as she goes at her, letting Egeria have the chance to fight back. She hits her without aim, smacking her arms and back as she tries to fight with the unfurled whip, until she lands on the ground, crawling away hands and feet.

She pushes her down with her foot placed in the centre of her back. "You're going to be the last person I ever kill. I saved that honour just for you."

"You're just as bad as he was. Look at you, look at how much you enjoy it."

"No, I'm only going to enjoy this."

Her skull cracks after three blows and Terra stands, just as she had that very first time, holding her hammer above her head, but she can hear the cheers this time, here the support, and she tilts her head up toward the sun. The light burns her eyes almost as much as Finnick's smile does.

And when she turns to him, seeking him out, he has that same smile, that same open acceptance that he had when she had won, and Terra sighs, happy. It's over.

°°°

wow so this took a darker turn than I thought it would but I can't have pictured Terra any other way.

Unedited

2020-01-18