Orochimaru's face if he was gonna rape Sasuke! ^

No One's POV

After a few days, Umiko's ears were okay for now. If she gave herself a rate to 10 for her ears, it'd be about 7 or 8.

It was now time for the third exams as Umiko stood next to where the other jounin teachers were standing since the hokage wanted her there and she could battle when her ears were fully healed.

After Hayate explained the rules and Kabuto quit, Umiko heard something when he was talking to one of his teammate.

"Have you forgotten Orochimaru's orders?" Yoroi asked him.

Kabuto turned around "I leave it to you guys."

Umiko gasped. The hokage notice this "What is it, Umiko?"

"Ojii-san. You have to keep a close eye on that Kabuto guy."

The hokage rose a eyebrow "What exactly did you hear, Umiko?"

"I think he's working with Orochimaru."

The hokage gasped but nodded.

The board thingy spun and two names appeared.

At the end of the match, Sasuke started to lose.

"Come on, Teme! Is that how strong the Uchihas are?!" Naruto screamed.

"Naruto!" Sakura scolded.

"Really, Ducky-chan?! I thought you were stronger that this, baka!" Umiko screamed at him over the railing.

"Umiko!"

All in all, Sasuke ended up using Lee's move and his curse mark started to act up. Soon, he fought it and it retracted back.

The other matches were:

"Woo, woo, woo!" Umiko whooped and waved her fist around over her head "Come on Shino! I don't know you very much but Woo!"

Her team sweatdropped behind her.

Shino ended up winning by his bugs exploding Zaku's arms.

Kankuro won, basically his puppet crushing Misumi, Kabuto's other teammate.

"Puppet and Noodle fight!" Umiko whooped again almost falling off the rail.

"Umiko!" Naruto held her waist to stop falling.

It was a tie. Ino entered Sakura's mind and tried to make her forfeit but Sakura's inner fought her.

"Hey! Isn't that considered cheating?! Who goes into people's mind and takes over them?! Bit-!" She tried to jump off the railing and give Ino a piece of her mind but Kakashi grabbed her waist and put his hand over her mouth, concealing the other part of the cuss word.

"Umiko! Shut up!" Kakashi whispered/ yelled at her.

"Chea-!"

Good thing Ino and Sakura were passed out so they couldn't hear what she was saying.

Temari won using her huge ass fan.

"I don't know who you are but how dare you do that to lee's teammate?! Slu-!" Kakashi immediately slammed his hand over her mouth to shut her up.

"Ho-!"

"Umiko! SHUT UP!"

Temari sweatdropped 'She's crazy' She confirmed.

Shikamaru ended up winning with his shadow possession, making Kin's bump her head on the wall that was behind her.

"Ha, ha! Stupid! You stup-!" She paused for a moment but recognized her and glared at her, shaking her fist "Hey! It's you! How dare you hurt Megumi! Ima fucki-!"

This time, Sasuke, Kakashi, and Naruto all tackled her to the floor.

Naruto ended up winning with Naruto farting in Kiba's face. And since Kiba is a Inuzuka, it was 10 times more stronger for him.

Umiko started to cough as she held her nose "I-I could smell it from here...!" She wheezed.

Kakashi sighed in relief "At least she's not screami-"

"Oi! Naruto! What the hell did you eat?! A fucki-!"

Other jounins and genins came to help shut the crazy blind ninja up.

--

Umiko went with Kakashi to help 'seal' Sasuke's curse mark.

"Man, why did I have to get dragged into this?" Umiko groaned as they arrived in the room.

"Cause I told you to." Kakashi replied, giving her a closed eye smile.

She mentally rolled her eyes "Whatever."

After Kakashi made him Sasuke sit down and take his shirt off, Umiko squatted down in front of him, knees spread apart (Don't worry. She has shorts underneath her dress), her wrists lazily hanging off her knee, she nudged Sasuke on the side with her elbow "Ne, ne, Ducky-chan?"

He looked at her "What?"

"Did it feel..." She looked around "...good?"

He gave her a confused look "What?" He repeated again.

"When that creepy snake guy...give you a hickey?!"

He blushed bright red "W-What?!"

"Ya know what I'm talking about. Did it? Did it?" She pushed on.

He stuttered "H-He didn't do that..."

"He did. Didn't he?" she got a idea "If he comes back to visit us," She looked around before looking at Sasuke "He's gonna fucking rape you in your sleep!" She wiggled her eyebrows.

Sasuke turned 10 times redder "D-Don't say that stuff!"

"He is, you never know." She then got another great idea and stood up.

"I'll call him, She said proudly and spread her arms apart.

Kakashi rolled his eye in the background 'Are these guys even supposed to be talking about this stuff?'