I do my best to hold back my laughter, truly. Okay, I tried just enough to say there was an effort made not to burst into fits of giggles in front of the blazing red man. While trying to hide his obvious embarrassment, Alarik raises a brow and places a sassy hand on his hip.

I laugh harder.

Had the bulge in his pants not still been evident, I probably would've continued the action for hours—but my brain all but dialed in on the sight before me. My desire rose at a steady pace, reminding me of just how close I'd been to that delicious creature only moments ago. I take a small step forward, licking my lips and hoping to get whatever remnants of his taste that I could. When I finally tear my eyes from his...member, I meet his eyes and almost die of an embarrassment of my own.

The Lycan had caught me staring, and the smirk on his face told me he was pleased with the results.

"You don't get to look at me like that! Not after what just almost happened." His hearty laugh is the response as I watch him through careful eyes. The sound brings waves of delight down my spine, and I want to hear that sound a lot more from his lips.

He shakes his head, trying to rid himself of the smile that's making my chest constrict in the strangest of ways. A few strands of hair slip from the bun he's made, my fingers ache to run through it.

Alarik's sexy lips are still swollen from my kiss, making me wet with the thought of him using that mouth on me again soon. Perhaps sex with this Lycan for the rest of my life wasn't a horrible idea?

"Let's go back to the packhouse before you decide to bite me again, I'd hate to tease you with something you'd regret later." He bites playfully in my direction, effectively bringing the biggest smile I've ever given to my face. I nod, although I disagree with his statement entirely.

If I had the opportunity, I'd show him every correct way to pleasure me, to the point of me never regretting anything done with the delicious male in Infront of me. My lady boner was certainly thinking for me.

"You go back, and I'll go run—shouldn't take me long." His smiling face turns quickly.

"I don't like that idea. I'll come with you and then we can—"

"No no no, I'm a big girl. When I'm done, I'll head straight back and then you can watch me shove cake in my face with that blink less gaze all day. How's that sound?" With a final smile thrown in his direction, I'm on my way, sprinting into the forest with a laugh that I don't recognize.

I jump over the fallen trees and enjoy the feeling of crunching snow beneath me, and I wonder if I'd be able to spend a few hundred years in a place like this. Freedom surrounds me until the scent of rotting flesh and grunts catch my attention. I follow it.

My movements slow, stealthy making my way to the area filled with whatever chaos is attacking my senses. I take my time climbing a tree, and then looking around it while making myself invisible to the enemy. Two rouges, covered in blood, bend forward and continue ripping into their most recent victim.

Dark veins are visible through their paled skin, patches of fur have escaped the human skin, along with their glowing red eyes these creatures are beyond terrifying. The familiar pack member they'd attacked is lifeless, thankfully as it would be feeling every type of pain right now otherwise. It only takes a moment for me to decide on my course of action, and although I know it would be better and easier to call for help, I've taken down these things before.

When I'm sure both are caught up in their meal, I pounce. The stench of their blood only thickening as I dig my fingers into the one, I tackle. The rogue screams with displeasure as I tear the brownish hair from his scalp, only letting him go when he's writhing on the ground. The other creature lunges for me with a war cry that sounded more like a gurgle, the first blow I land is in his decaying ribs and the other to his nose before I swipe his legs from under him.

I barely duck as the other rogues' swings for me, his lack of balance gives me a great advantage and I slam my hand through its chest with enough strength to reach the barely beating heart. I rip it from him without hesitance, both falling to the ground with a thud.

I meet the eyes of the remaining rogue as I prepare to take him down, only distracted when howls begin only a mile or so away. The pack was coming to help, but by the time I give my attention back to the matter at hand he's taken advantage. Clawed fingers are tearing are my shoulder as we hit the cold Earth, my blood mixing with his. A let out a hiss of pain as he presses further into my shoulder, those teeth biting at me in hungry desperation.

My mind is spinning, trying to tell my body it'll be okay and that one right move against this beast will end the fight. I'm looking for ways to get him off me. His weight is crushing me, holding me hostage as I barely get my hands between us and push him further from me.

I'm screaming out a name a didn't expect, the Lycans war cry answering in return and I can hear how close everyone is. I almost sigh in happiness and instead let open my mouth in a silent scream as the Rogue put just enough momentum into his body and sinks his teeth into my shoulder.

He's tackled from me by the largest wolf I'd ever seen, but I don't have time to admire the fine beast—instead, I'm clawing at my burning skin with maddening desperation. I can feel every limb tightening, the heaviness coming faster than I thought it would as my nails drag and dig into their being. I'm not sure if my pain is from the deadly venom or its assault upon itself.

Leslie knocks into my now paralyzed body causing me to release a strangled scream, her already concerned expression deepening. I roll my head to face the other direction, watching as the impressive wolf shifts into a male, I recognize all too well. If it wasn't for the Earthshattering pain, I would've whistled out to him, given him a little wink.

I would've done anything to turn that current frown into a smile. I can see him fuming but controlling himself to the best of his ability as he makes his way towards me with long strides. The calm feeling moving over me is ripped away as I'm jerked towards the black-haired woman, her mouth moving so fast I can't understand a word.

She's screaming, I know that. Cursing, most likely.

My eyes are blinking closed, barely staying open as I mourn the loss of what I wanted to be my last view. The male who's very being brought upon a pleasure, even when my body was being devoured by the rouge's venom.

She slaps me, causing my eyes to open wide again but it's only for a moment and then the darkness is dragging me under. I'm almost disappointed I don't get to enjoy the time with a Lycan that I'd secretly been fawning over this whole time, but the thought of my family waiting for me has me accepting my fate. I don't fight the drowsiness, no matter how much Leslie begs me to. Her desperate assault doing nothing to stop me from doing my best to join my family.

----------------

The chaos overwhelms me when I open my eyes. Alarik has Leslie held against the wall across from me, his hand on her neck as he yells and causes those large tears to run faster. Wolves are walking around us, ignoring the show as if it was just an everyday occurrence. I try to speak, to threaten the man hurting my friend, but my voice comes out as a croak instead—but it catches the Lycan's attention.

I do everything I can to hold back my pained groans, noting that the pain had spread throughout my entire body at this point and hadn't just settled at my neck. Silver orbs meet mine as he comes to a rushed stop beside me, his hand incasing mine with desperation. Leslie's body hits the floor, she takes her time getting up and I can feel her eyes surveying me.

Her sniffles almost bringing my gaze from the male beside me, but not quite.

"It's okay, you're going to be okay," Alarik assures me, his hand cradling mine with a gentleness I'd never known. He's lying, of course, the scent of it practically pouring from him and I wasn't in any way surprised. I wasn't sure how I hadn't died yet.

"Eira, listen carefully..." Leslie takes small steps towards us, mirroring Alarik on the opposite side of the bed while staring at me with a solemn glare. "We have two options. It's entirely your choice, and we need you to answer honestly. No matter the consequences, okay?" I'm nodding furiously, already succumbing to the pain once again.

"You can give in, let it take you or we can heal you...but I would need to mark you. Your soul would more than likely bond with mine and it would make it easier for our—" I'm shaking my head desperately, croaking one no after the other as I see the dread fill my mate.

He'd expected me to say yes to him making us one, to me completely giving up my freedom for pleasure and future only he ached for. I feel vulnerable, knowing death was so close but so far, an excitement I could barely comprehend. Mother would be waiting for me, alongside my brothers and my father.

Could I make them proud?

My head falls back onto the pillow, allowing me to feel slightly more at peace even with the endless pain coursing through my body. I imagine my family, bringing myself comfort as I find comfort in the thoughts and the knowledge that I should've died so long ago. Had I given in to so many opportunities I could've had my family back by now?

"Eira, please don't do this." He begs, my eyes lazily move to his frame as he hunches beside me with shaky fingers and quivering lips. He moves until his face is only a few inches from mine, the sound of Leslie's sobs are only background noise as I enjoy the view before me. Alarik is throwing a fit, cursing, and promising all at once.

I use my energy to smile as it reminds me of my father, such similar tempers they had. Those beautiful silver orbs close for a few moments, deep breaths that I imagine to be his acceptance of my decision. When they open, however, I see a difference in his stare.

"I won't lose you, Little Vampire. No matter how lost you're determined to be." Alarik leans in to place a kiss on my forward, making a pleasured but rough sigh to leave me as I enjoy his show of affection. "I'm so sorry, Love."

I'm a second too late to realize his intention, as is Leslie as she screams out for the Lycan to stop his movements. That familiar hand clenches my hair and jerks my head to the side before sinking his elongated canines into my neck—opposite of where the rogue had gotten me.

I cry out in pain and pleasure before everything falls away and I'm in the dark once more.

When I was turned by the coven who'd slaughtered my family, my main memory consisted of the hunger that was brought on by the quick switch in species. It was almost endless at the time, taking over four men to be brutally drained to satisfy the hunger inside of the new body I hadn't recognized. My appetite was monstrous. No blood was ever enough, never filling the emptiness that sat inside of me and begged to be fed with the pain and end of others. I'd spent weeks in a room being taught how to feed without killing my food, and having my new life explained.

I was told that once I found my control, I'd be fine to slip back into the life of humans as I'd be required to eat less than humans and almost any other species. We were dead, bodies running smoothly if they weren't entirely overexerted on an empty stomach. Being dead had its pluses, I suppose.

Dead.

The word brings sound rushing to me, lights burning my eyes as they snap open and I hiss with disdain. I'm surprised, almost prepared to question my lack of an end when the sweet melody of a heartbeat fills my ears and I'm on my feet. My vision is tunneled, senses on edge as I make my way to the blood bag that captures every bit of my attention. She's pretty, the woman who is about to experience my teeth in her neck while that pretty face calms in disbelief and whichever feeling I decide to give her. I lunge, prepared to ruin her for the simple need of easing the burn in my throat.

"Stop—give her to me." I practically screech as the food is taken from me. My limbs flail violently as I try to fight off the male, but as quickly as the woman is ripped from me, I am suddenly pinned to the bed while my fangs beg to enter the soft skin above me.

I'd already tasted this familiar male, and my body craved to drain every drop from his decadent body. I'm almost distracted by the way his body molds into mine, the perfection of his skin against mine, and the sudden ache between my thighs as I realize how close he is. The moans threaten to leave me, to give away just how much I want him—to feed on, fuck, and possibly hold. The male is mine, somewhere inside of me the words are spoken with more conviction than I prefer.

"Calm down, Eira. I can't let you go until you stop fighting." If my heart could still beat it would be out of my chest at this point, the sound of Alarik's voice sends my body into overdrive. Achy and wet. Desperate and wanting. Those worried lips are now turning upwards, showing me a tired smile as he slowly begins to release me once I'm still.

He cups my face, bringing me the comfort I'd only dreamed of as he strokes me with his warm fingers.

"I'm so hungry..." I manage to whisper, and those bright eyes dim as he looks away but gives me a small nod.

"We've collected a few humans for you to feed on, but she doesn't happen to be one of them. Now-"It's a switch, the moment I get a taste of jealousy it flares up and I'm a rabid woman ready to bite.

"Who is she to you," I growl, eyes wide with rage as a dozen questions fill my head. Who is she? Why does he need her? Why haven't I decapitated her by now?

Alarik doesn't seem upset by my outburst an almost smug grin lights up his face as he's captured me in his arms. The most delicious, and restrictive hug I've ever endured. I wait for his reply, to hear him admit that all his talk of wanting me was a lie and he'd chosen this woman-

"That's the woman Leslie has been feeding on while you've been resting for the past two weeks, notice her scent? She's a feeder, baby. She's nothing to me."

Two weeks? I'd been asleep for two weeks? When I step away from the Lycan he doesn't try to fight me, my eyes finding the white tiled floor as my brain finally begins putting the past together. The rogues, the venom...my near death. The suffocating feelings I've randomly developed for the male in front of me sends my hand to the last place I remember this monster being.

He was teeth deep in my shoulder, the realization of his betrayal hitting me so hard that my stomach turns and I'm trying to create more distance between us, He reaches out, knowing that once I'm away from him I will not be coming back.

"I told you to let me go." It's an angry plea, a breaking inside of me as the soft bit of light I'd felt shining through is replaced by darkness. My body preparing itself for a hurt that I'd never expected to deal with again.

He had ruined it, took away my choice just as the vampire who had changed me had done.

"You have to understand, I couldn't let you die like that. Not when I've waited so long- "

"This is not about you!" I scream, hands in the air as I try to get my point across but stay away from him at the same time. "You don't get to play god with other people's lives, not when I've waited so long for the opportunity you just stole from me."

This argument immediately makes me aware of how much this mark affects me, my body hurting as the tension between us only continues to rise. He thought he was saving me, but what the man didn't realize is that it's making me feel as though I was losing my parents all over again. His eyes harden, back straightening as he continues to stand by his beyond fucked up decision.

Alarik could feel my pain just as I could feel the regret that fills him for a moment, but he buries it beneath what he believes to be his correct decision. He'd never see the pain he's caused me, only the loneliness he's avoided. I'm grieving another loss and he's celebrating a win.

"I couldn't let you leave me like that." It's cold, the voice he uses to excuse his actions. The beast, barely hidden by the handsome skin he prances around in, rears its ugly head when I scoff at him. But then, I'm smiling. Releasing laughter that makes the big man falter with uncertainty.

Yes, Lycan, your mate is a lunatic. A bloodthirsty, life-ruining, mad woman.

"You're a fool." It's a taunt, my head tilting as my feet carry me forward. "You can feel it, can't you? How badly you've hurt me, how little I think of the man who put his entire world into my existence. Any chance you thought existed, is gone."

Black eyes smolder above me once I've gotten within a few inches of his, those nostrils flare and I can tell it's taking all of his self-control to hold himself back from me. He's planning in his head, telling himself there's no way he could lose me so easily and that nothing could separate us.

"I will admit I was selfish with the decision, but you will forgive me. Our bond won't allow you to reject-"

"We will never finish this bond. My teeth will give many other males pleasure, many humans, wolves, and anyone that isn't you—the man who stole everything from me. To you, the bond is everything. To me, it's as useless as the male in front of me. You've lost the one thing you have chased your entire life. Now get out of this room, Alpha King."

Alarik lunges forward, arms caging me as he growls out his displeasure and forces his warmth into me. The peace his touch is supposed to bring lets me down, instead, I'm filled with anger and grief. In his arms, I feel the opposite of how I'm supposed to, and I begin screaming to show it. I'm threatening him, explaining my hatred for him, and declaring war.

"We will get through this. You will forgive me because you know it had to be done." He's speaking calmly, but I know it's his Lycan saying the words. His beast is barely being controlled, only held back by the attempt to not kill his mate with his monstrous side. The male is trying to convince himself of the truth behind those words, more so than he is me.

The man feels everything I'm throwing at him, and not one ounce of it involves love or forgiveness. Someone is clearly in denial.

When Leslie burst into the room I am let go, my body moving towards her on instinct as the fight slowly drains out of me at the sight of someone I trust. She can take care of me; I trust her enough to help me.