Day 55

Afternoon

I peered out my window to watch the pouring rain. The cloudy afternoon skies made it feel like evening was already approaching, when really we've only just had lunch.

The prince didn't dine with us during breakfast, or lunch because he was still asleep. Or so Kace said. Yesterday was probably very tiring for him. But about him.

I haven't recovered from yesterday's weird event and this weird feeling in my chest. When I think about the things that happened to me and the prince in the past, I can feel myself overheating.

I'm not usually like this! Those moments in the past meant nothing.

"Agh stupid prince! His words are messing with my head. Constantly saying that me him and I'll get married. Pft! Like hell I'd want to marry! Like hell I'd want to end up the queen!" I push open the windows and lift my leg up to the ledge. "I will not succumb to these ridiculous emotions!"

"R-riselle?! You idiot what are you doing?!" I see the white haired mage down by the garden with an umbrella. "I can see your bloomers!" He shifted his umbrella to be covering his view of me instead of protecting himself from the rain.

"Why are you looking at them?!" I yell back at him.

"How am I supposed to not see them when your leg is up like that! And are you trying to kill yourself? I said get down you idiot or I'll kill you first!"

"I refuse to accept this thing we humans possess called feelings! It's bothersome!" I stopped for a moment to take a deep breath.

"Feelings?" Luca dropped his umbrella. "Towards whom...?"

"Towards some cocky bastard!"

I put my hand on the windows for support, and lift my other leg up and pull myself upwards so that I was standing on the frame. Before I began my silent wills, I realized Luca had a rather sad look on his face, while just letting himself get wet from the pouring rain. Well, I was too just standing out here like this.

"Oii. You're going to get sick if you do that." I tell him. "Something wrong? Your mood changed suddenly."

"You told me my plan backfired, right?" He responds with a sulky voice.

"Err yeah. Yeah! Instead of the prince finding someone else, he just messes my head up instead! What does he think he's doing! In front of his female guests he disrespectfully talks about another girl!?"

Luca started laughing after my short rant. Not a joyful laugh, but a creepy one. And this atmosphere isn't helping.

"Backfired... Yeah it really did backfire." He continued. Laughing in the midst and ends of his speech, one hand against his forehead with his fingers tangled in his hair. "How unforseen." The laughing male stopped and looked up at me. I felt a mix of fear and embarrassment because I was completely aware my dress was blowing and yet I was not doing anything about it because if I move any weird way, rest in peace me.

I mean, I did come here to vanquish myself from the face of this world, but I wasn't ready just yet.

"Riselle has developed feelings for the Prince." He said sternly, and looked pained. "Riselle likes the prince."

Hey no! I just said feelings! I mean he's messing my head up and I feel like I'm having feelings! I feel my face heat up again, and in the mix of emotions I felt at that very moment, I lost my footing and fell forward.

I tightly shut my eyes, waiting for the impact to hit, but instead I feel a wet cloth wrap around me. It all happened really quick, but it felt cold.

"You idiot I told you to get down from there."

I open my eyes to find myself in Luca's arms. Well of course he caught me from that fall. His face was only inches away from mine, his breath was cold against my skin and droplets of water that rained down on him slowly dripped onto me.

His eyes held a deep sadness to it. But I can't understand why. I said I had feelings.

I don't plan to dwell on those feelings either. But why is Luca so upset? Does he dislike the idea of me becoming the prince's bride? Pfft. Sounds like a dad. Or maybe he's really just upset his plan backfired. All I can do is just keep guessing because males most of the time refuse to show their honest feelings.

"You... Idiot." He pulled me even closer to him and buried his face into my neck. "I'm glad I was able to catch you in time."

What am I supposed to do in this situation? Comfort him? I'm pretty sure I'm supposed to comfort him!

Part of me wished he could bring us inside because now the two of us were getting soaked like this. But I need to stable my thoughts for a moment and comfort this man. I've never seen him like this before.

"Yeah. I'm glad you were able to catch me too. Thank you Luca." I lifted my hand up and placed it on his head. Softly patting it.

"Idiot..." Was all he said after that. In a small, fragile voice accompanied with stiffles like he was holding back tears. "I wish I could hold you like this more often. But I don't think that's ever going to happen."

"What do you mean by that?"

"My plan... Truly did backfire."

"Luca... I won't be able to understand you if you keep speaking so vaguely."

"I'll tell you properly another time. But for now, let me cherish this moment."

Heck, My emotions are too overwhelming for me now! Too much confusion...

Also, I wonder if this has anything to do with what Adria has been telling me about back then.

"Riselle. You shouldn't deny your feelings for the prince." He pulls away from me and takes us back into the castle's interior while I was still being carried by him. Sorry maids! They'll have a lot of mopping to do later. Ah the guilt.

"Why? I don't want these feelings though..."

"The more you try to deny them, Reject them, Ignore them, it'll just grow even worst. Trust me, I've made that mistake for myself and now I'm in a limbo of loving a girl who won't love me back no matter what schemes I think up.

But, accepting those feelings do no good either."

"Then that's like saying that there is no way out!"

Luca simply smiles at me, and sets me on the ground. I'm completely soaked and this is so uncomfortable!

"Go dry yourself now. Before you catch a cold."