"Bondita banjh kya hota hain ye janne ki zaroorat nehi, tum bas parhai pe dhyan do" I consoled her.

"Par sab mujhe ye kyu kehe rahe hain?" She asked me innocently.

I creased her hair gently, "kuch to log kahenge logo ka kaam hain kehena, tum ek kaan se andar lo aur ek kaan se bahar feko issey".

I rubbed off her tears and made her drink water, "homework karlo jao".

I was shocked, angry at the same time. How could people be so cheap, calling a little girl infertile, expecting children from her? My heart ached when they made her cry. How am I going to make her understand what banjh is and the full situation

"ye kya Boudi! Ye tumhe kaha se mila" I saw her secretly taking out a romantic novel from her bag.

"Shh dheere bolo" she gestured me to be quiet.

"Dav das?" I read the name on the book, "Dada bohot gussa karenge, unhone kaha hain baccho ko aise kitab nehi parna chahiye".

"Isiliye to churaye hain usdin jisdin prefect wala interview ki practice kar rahi thi" she giggled.

"Ye galat hain" I said.

"Dhur, kya galat hain pyar k baare mein janne se aur tum jante ho har ek line muzubani yaad hain mujhe, sunoge?" She said excitedly.

"Ha ha zaroor"

"To suno....pyar aatma ki parchi hain, ishq ishwar ki ibadat aur mohabbat zindagi ka maksad....kaisa tha" she said with a wide smile.

"Accha to tha par kya tumhe insab ka matalab pata hain?" I asked her doubtfully.

"Nehi baare pechida hain is kitab k haar ek baat, kuch samajh nehi ata, dono ek dusre se itna hi agar pyar karte the to ego aur pyar k jung mein pyar ko kyu nehi chuna? kyu haarne diya pyar ko, kyu jaane diya? samajh nehi ata ye kahani par parke accha lagta hain, abh tum ek line parho na" she insisted.

I opened a random page and read a line, "Ek baat hoti thi jab tum bohot yad ati thi, jab jab mein sans leta tha tab tab".

"Ye bhi samajh nehi aya" she started laughing.

I faked a smile. I understood each and every word because maybe the lines weren't mine but the emotion was. I want to say her this but I cannot. I looked at her with my tear brimmed eyes.

"Waise batuk tum aise expression lees hoke kyu parte ho, ye pyar ki kitaab hain, thik se parho na. Tumhe pyar jatana hi nehi ata" she laughed again.

I let out a painful chuckle and thought, "sach mein Bondita mujhe pyar karna aata hain par jaatana nehi".

While we were gossiping kaka and Sampoorna maa knocked on the door. Boudi immediately hid the book by her pallu.

"Batuk bahar jao" kaka instructed me.

"Bondita bahu tum jo bhi mangti ho tumhare pati babu to tumhe wahi dete hain, hain na?" Kaka Sasurji asked me.

"Haa"

"To jaake apne pati babu se patni ka adhikar mang, santaan sukh mang samjhi" said Didi.

"Wo kya hota hain" I scratched my head.

"Matlab bacche mango" said Kaka hesitantly.

"Pati babu pari thori na hain?"I asked them, "wo kaise denge bacche."

"Bacche pari nehi pati dete hain" didi suddenly scolded me.

"To aplog hi mang lo na"

Hearing this kaka cleared his throat, "bahu...aisi baatein nehi karte."

"Sun Bondita sab tujhe bahar banjh bol rahe hain na...agar tere pati babu tujhe patni ka darja denge to wo log tujhe banjh nehi bulayenge".

I thought for a while, "haa didi sab mujhse dur bhag rahe hain, mujhe ye nehi pasand, thik hain mein pati babu se mangungi".

I don't want others to call me banjh and treat me like that. Didi told me if I ask pati babu for children they won't call me by that name. So pati babu will take a baby from the pari and gift it to me.

"Pati babu" I knocked at the door.

"Ao andar" he said and continued to work.

"Wo...ap mujhe patni ka darja denge na" I said.

He stopped his work and looked at me, "kya kaha tumne?"

"Mujhe baccha chahiye" I said timidly.

"Bondita!" He yelled and stood up. I got scared and backed off, "kya keh rahi ho tum ye."

"Ap chahate ho Bondita ko sab banjh bulay? Nehi na? To do na mujhe patni ka adhikar".

"Bondita ye sab baatein apne dimag se nikal feko samjhi"

"Nehi nehi! Mujhe santaan sukh chahiye"

I know it's not her fault. She is just parroting what this society was teaching her but I lost control over my anger and threw the hourglass on the floor, breaking it into pieces.

She went quiet now. She got scared by my behaviour perhaps.

"Meine apse ekhi to chiz mangi" she cried, "par ap aise bartaav kar rahe hain?".

I pulled her out of the study, "andar maat ana" I warned her the locked myself inside.

She banged the door, "pati babu darwaza kholiye na, ap jab tak nehi kholenge, mein yehi rahungi".

Ignoring her call I sat on the crouch. My head was aching, how am I going to free her from the Society's clutches. I could hear her crying outside but I cannot help but act heartless at that point of time.

She continued to cry and bang the door but then suddenly her cry stopped. I Peeped out and found her sleeping near the door. I went outside and sat beside her, patting her head. Suddenly she placed her head on my lap and hugged my hand in sleep. I looked at her innocent sleeping face.

"Bas umar mein hi bari hui hain, aj bhi bacchi hain meri Bondita, bholi hain, aur log uske isi masumiyat aur bhole pan ka fayda utha rahe hain. Tum to chahati ho wo tumhare pati babu tumhe kabhi nehi de payenge Bondita, zindagi mein kabhi nehi".

I was very sad the next morning. Pati babu was ignoring me. Are babies too expensive??? Did pari denied to give the baby to him??

"Dada" Batuk whispered in my ears. Som leaned to listen too.

"Dada, second semester mein humare syllabus mein reproduction chapter hain bas tabh tak ka wait karlo fir is bail buddhi ko samajh a jaygi".

I looked at him furiously and Som giggled.

"Dada" whispered Som, "Batuk sahi keh raha hain, Bondita pe ap gussa maat karo, ussey kaha in sab baaton ki samajh hain."

I looked at her. She was standing with teary eyes and gloomy face beside me.

I felt my hands wet. Tears dropped down her cheeks and fell on my wrist but I acted as of I don't care.

Bihari sun zara" kaka whispered in his ears, "wo jo laane ko kaha tha laya?"

"Haa malik, lay hain hum apne gaon se. Raat ko Barrister babu k kapi (coffee) mein mila denge, fir to agle saal lalla k khilkariya khilenge" he said gesturing a cradle by his hands.

"Haa Bihari, ek saal tak pota a jayega, Roy Chowdhury o ka vanshak, Bahu bhi maa ban jaygi to ye bachpana bhi chala jayga abh itni bari ho gyi hain, ye baccho jaisi harkat shobha deta hain kya ussey? Par Anirudh ussey ek bacchi ki tarha maanta hain kehta hain ki abhi bhi bacchi hain....Arrey aise umar mein maa ban jati hain har aurat par Bondita to Aniruddh k liye zyada hi khaas hain, kabhi kabhi lagta hain ye ladka bahu ki pati se zyada maa hain".

"Sampoorna kitna accha banaya hain tumne khana" said Binoy

"Huh!" Kaka exclaimed being irritated, "wah! Jawan beta busurg banta hain patni k samne aur busurg baap jawan banta hain patni k samne....shiv shiv shiv"

Later in evening

I went to Devipur to talk regarding Bondita's matter. Only Sumati maa could help me now. When I narrated her the whole problem she said, "jamai babu wo kuch bhi kahe ap to jaante hain na meri bacchi ko insab ki samaj nehi hain".

"Haa maa isiliye to ata hu, mein agle hafte Bondita k sath aunga, ap ussey samjha dena, ap se zyada acche se ussey koi nehi samjha sakta".

Koyli Didi and Sampoorna didi made me wear a gorgeous and beautiful saree. They treated my hair with steam, made me wear a lot of jewelleries.

"Sun Bondita aj tere zindagi k sabse bara din hain" Didi whispered.

"Kyu? aj mein Barrister banungi kya?"

"Nehi, aj tere churiya tootenge, baal khulenge, payel toorenge par yaad rakhna pati babu ko khush karna hain".

"Mein samjhi nehi didi" I was confused.

"Ofho Bondita bass ye yaad rakh aj kuch bhi ho jay, kitna bhi ghabrahat ho, dard ho, chikhna chillana par kamre se bahar maat ana, agar kamre se tu bahar agyi to pari nehi ayegi bacche dene" said Didi.

I was still confused, "dard kyu hoga didi?"

"Chup reh tu" she said "aur jaa apne pati babu k pass."

I entered home late. It was dark perhaps every one had fallen asleep. As I entered Bihari came running to me with coffee, "chote malik ap thak gye honge, lijiye apki kapi pi lijiye".

I took the cup, after he went away I kept the cup on the table and went to my room.

Actually Bondita has given me a very bad habit in all these years. I don't like anyone elses made coffee other than hers. I don't know what she puts in it but her coffee has a different taste. You know why is it special? Because that is how my mother's made coffee used to taste.

I went to my room and sat on the rocking chair when I heard a soft gentle voice.

"Dev Babu"