My life is over.

I'm going to get expelled. I'm going to have a big black mark on my permanent record. I'm not going to go to Harvard. I'm not going to go to any school. I'm going to be a failure. A disappointment. A poster child. They'll talk about me for years. The bright mind that could've changed the world. The girl who could've had it all. The girl who could've been a star among comets.

My life is over and yet... I don't feel anything. I should feel something. I should feel sad or worried or angry or anxious.

But I don't.

"It's mine," Ollie says, his tone even, free of any doubt, any second thought. "Those are mine."

"What are you doing?" I whisper, eyes wide as my gaze darts between Oliver and Mrs. Patella. "They're-"

"She confiscated them from me earlier tonight," he continues with a shrug, taking a step forward. "They're mine."

What is he doing? Why is he doing this? Is he insane?

"Oliver-"

"No." He looks over his shoulder, resolve in his eyes as he gives me a nod. "You don't need to protect me, Kennedy. It's fine." He turns back to Mrs. Patella. "She was just about to turn me in." A forced laugh. "Guess you beat her to it." Ollie holds up his wrists. "To jail, I presume?"

I gawk at him, bewildered by his laissez-faire attitude. He's laughing? Making a joke out of this? He's going to get kicked out of school. He's going to lose his internship. He's going to lose everything. And for what? For me? He's not thinking clearly. He's not thinking at all.

"That's not true," I plead, rushing to Oliver's side.

"Will you shut up, Kennedy?!" Ollie raises his voice, shooting me daggers, his entire disposition darkening "I don't need you to cover for me, okay? I can take care of my own problems, yeah?" With a locked jaw, he looks at Mrs. Patella. "What now?"

"Please follow me, Mr. Knight," Mrs. Patella says, shaking her head in disappointment. What?! "This trip is over for you. Let's go!"

"No!" I exclaim frantically, my heart clenching in my chest as I follow Ollie and Mrs. Patella to the door, the gabbing whispers of my classmates whirling around me. "He's lying to you! It's mine! The pills are mine."

Mrs. Patella stops, a sympathetic gleam in her eyes as she says, "Kennedy, dear, I think it is very admirable that you don't want to get your friend into trouble but-"

"But nothing!" I say, frustration oozing from my pores. "It's me. Really! Ollie is covering for me!"

"Go now." Mrs. Patella lets out a sigh, motioning for Oliver to follow another teacher. Oliver doesn't look back as he disappears through the door. "Please write an incident report, Miss Carmichael, the headmaster will want to read it."

"Oh my God..." I expel a maniacal laugh. "What incident?! Nothing happened. It's not his! Why aren't you listening to me?! It's mine. Mine. Mine. Mine."

"I know it's difficult dear," she says, patting my shoulder. "Sometimes upholding the rules isn't easy, especially when the repercussions are as serious as this, but you already did the right thing by confiscating the drugs." She smiles at me. "The hard part is done, Miss Carmichael."

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Am I in a parallel universe right now? "Are you deaf or something?!"

"Now Miss Carmichael," Mrs. Patella scolds, frowning. "Look what this boy has turned you into." She clicks her tongue. "With a record like his, I knew granting him admission was a bad idea." She exhales, turning away. She heads to the door, closing it behind her, whispering under her breath, "But does anyone listen to little old me? No. Never."

"Wha-" I blink as the door slams shut, unable to process what just happened.

"Kenny." Max runs up to me, putting a hand on my shoulder. "Dude, are you okay?"

"No!" I cry, shrugging her off. "I need to stop this. He can't-"

"Relax, Ken," Max says, brows furrowed. "Just calm down."

"Calm down?!" My body vibrates at the injustice of it all. "Did you not just see what happened? You saw that right?! She just brushed me off, Max! What the actual fuck." I turn on my heel, determined to right this wrong. "I need to-"

"Ken, stop!" Max grabs my arm, preventing me from exiting the cabin. I turn around, dumbfounded. "Don't do this."

"What?" I ask, losing my damn mind. "Don't tell the truth? Max...he's going to get expelled."

"I know," Max swallows. "But you're not." She sighs, her gaze sweeping the ground. "I like Ollie, I do but-" She glances at me. "I love you more, so please, just let him do this for you."

"No." I shake my head. "No way."

"Kennedy-"

"No!" I reach for the door handle. "He's not doing this! No fucking way!"

"Kennedy, wait!" Max calls out as I step onto the porch, thankful that my nosy-ass classmates have decided to call it a night. "Dude, stop! What're you doing?!"

"I'm going to go find Mrs. Patella and tell her to let Ollie go," I state, marching down the stairs.

"But what about Harvard, Ken?" Maxine asks, rushing after me. "You realize what you're about to do, right?" Max grabs my arm. "Kennedy, stop and think for just a second!"

"Think about what?" I ask. "Think about Oliver throwing his whole future away just so I can go to Harvard? There's nothing to think about. He is not doing this for me."

"He already has, Ken," Max says in a soft tone. "It's done."

"It's not done until I say it's done," I declare, continuing to walk towards the teacher's cabin. "I'll just have to prove to them that the pills were mine."

"And how are you going to do that, huh?" Max asks, joining my side. "Clearly, Mrs. P doesn't believe you, so what are you going to do, Ken?" She lowers her voice. "Just let it go, Kenny. Let it go."

"Seriously?" I stop outside the washrooms, crossing my arms as I glower at Maxine. "How are you okay with this? You don't think it's a bit fucked up that just because Ollie has a bit of a past, he's automatically the bad guy here? That it must be his? That there's no way sweet, innocent me could be taking drugs? You don't think that's messed up?"

"I do...but-" Maxine shrugs. "Reputations matter and yours is just...cleaner than his."

"I don't care." My jaw clenches. "This isn't right."

"Maybe you should wait until the morning," Max suggests. "Give yourself some time to cool down and-"

The door to the washroom opens, the motion sensors lighting up Corrine's face as she exits. "Oh, it's the pill popper," she chides, blowing air out her nose as she strides towards us, the stench of vodka on her breath. "I'm going to get you, Kennedy, believe me, bitch." She grinds her teeth. "If you think you can get away with fucking me over like this?" She lets out a laugh. "Think again."

"You did this?" I narrow my eyes, scanning her flushed face. "Wha-"

"You're a real snake, Kennedy," Corrine states, disgust in her voice. "I mean, I knew you hated me, and honestly, I was a fucking idiot to trust you, to believe you, but you can't change who you are, can you?"

"The blast?" I ask, ignoring Maxine's confused stares. "You think that was me?"

"Or her." Corrine's gaze briefly snaps to Maxine before landing on my face. "Or both of you."

"Wait," Max says, clueing in as she looks at me. "You knew about-" She not-so-discreetly nods at Corrine. "The thing?"

Corrine rolls her eyes. "Nice try but your acting needs some work."

"And your need to be a vindictive bitch needs some work," I growl, taking a step forward so that we're face to face. "What is wrong with you?"

"Hah," Corrine huffs, crossing her arms. "What's wrong with me? What the fuck is wrong with you! I knew you were a lot of things, Kenny, but I didn't think you were a liar. I actually thought you might keep it a secret but clearly, I was wrong." She sighs. "Now I guess your little boyfriend will suffer the consequences of your snakey actions. Sorry, not sorry."

"You're a fucking idiot, Corrine," I state, a vile taste in my mouth. "I didn't say shit to anyone, okay? Not even Maxine."

"Lies, no one else knew," Corrine says, glaring at me. "How'd you even know it was Zeek, huh? Lucky guess?"

I blink. "What?"

"Cut the shit, Ken," Corrine says. "Running Back? Quarterback? It was clever, even for you." She tousels her hair. "If only I didn't see that little mint tin, hey? Oh well, c'est la vie."

"Oh my God, you were fucking Zeek?!" Max pipes up, unable to stay silent any longer. "Dude..."

"You were cheating on Sawyer..." I cringe. "With Zeek? Ew."

Corrine's nose flares. "Fuck you, Kenny."

I bite my tongue, stopping myself from saying something that will hurt me more than it'll Corrine. Rise above. You are not this person. Making her feel bad won't help you feel better. It won't change anything. It won't help fix the situation.

"You know what?" I tilt my head. "I feel really bad for you, Corrie. I really do."

"Yeah?" she asks defensively, her body tensing. "And why's that?"

"Because Sawyer was right," I explain. "You are insecure."

"I'm not-"

"I didn't tell anyone, Corrine, that's a fact," I continue, cutting off. "So if you're looking for someone to blame, I'd maybe look a little closer to home."

"No one else knew," she states firmly. "No one."

"Really? No one else knew you were banging Zeek?" Max asks. "Not even your dumb friends?"

Corrine stiffens.

"That's what I thought," Max says, taking a step forward. "You should thank your lucky stars that I'm practicing non-violence." I shoot Max a curious side-eye. Since when? "Otherwise, I'd break your fucking face right now." My eyes widen as her fist clenches and she takes a deep breath. "So, so lucky."

"Down girl," I whisper, tugging the hem of Max's shirt. I look up at Corrine once I'm confident Maxine isn't going to go all Black Widow on Corn's ass. "I'm sorry that your secret got out, okay? But you really fucked up." I check my phone. Damn, it's late. "And now I gotta go fix it."

"Ken-"

"Go back to the cabin, Max," I say lifelessly, a wave of exhaustion washing over me as I walk away from Corrine, leaving her standing alone in the dark. Where she belongs. "It's over."

Max doesn't follow me. Maybe she understands now. Maybe she sees why I need to do this. It was my decision to start taking Adderall. It was my choice. I did that. And every decision, despite its intentions, matters.

I just needed to stay awake. I needed to concentrate. I needed to be the best. Always the best. There wasn't another option. I'm a Carmichael. We can't fail. Failure was not an option. Mediocrity was not an option. I needed help. It wasn't supposed to come to this. It wasn't a problem. I didn't think it was a problem.

Until now.

I won't let Oliver jeopardize his future for me. I won't let him make that decision. It's not him to make.

I knock on the door of the teacher's cabin.

This is my decision. My problem.

And I'm the only one that can solve it.

"Miss Carmichael," Mrs. Patella says, opening the door. "Please go back to your cabin."

"No," I say, holding my ground. "I need to talk to you."

"It's late, Miss Carmichael," she says, yawning. "This can wait until the morning."

"It wasn't Oliver's pills," I say. "The Adderall was mine."

"Kennedy," she says gently. "I know you like this boy, but don't throw your entire future away for him. It's not worth it, believe me." She covers her mouth, suppressing another yawn. "Plus, Mr. Knight has already been taken back to Hilton. Go to sleep, alright? We can talk more in the morning if you want."

She still doesn't believe me. It's like she's blinded by his past. She can't see the truth even though it's right here.

And the truth is...

He is worth it.

"Fine," I say, pulling out my phone. I hope he's still awake. "Have a goodnight, Mrs. Patella."

"You too, dear," she says, shutting the door.

I dial the only man that I've ever trusted.

"Kenny?"

"Hi, Eddie, I need a ride."

"Is everything alright, sweetpea?"

"No, but it will be."

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Only four chapters left.... and the next one ya'll will finally get what you came here for haha

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