i hate the way I am.

i hate how I could be surrounded by all my friends and somehow feel more lonely than I've ever felt.

i hate missing the way it felt to know that I was someone's favorite person.

i hate how I could cry in the bathroom and come back and no one would even notice I was gone.

i hate how unimportant i am.

but most importantly, I hate how I miss the way you loved me, how I still think I'm undeserving of any attention you could ever give me.

i could never hate you, but hating myself is such an easy task compared to having to suffer without your love, be empty for the rest of my life and wish I had, at least, stopped hating myself.