"Someone needs to enlighten me!"

Elijah yells from the gang house's living room, Cole just as furious by his side.

"How the hell did that happen?"

All of their members and bodyguards standing around, looking at each other. Elijah stands with a gun in his hand. Every time he yells, it wavers slightly.

As the boys yell, I can't help but stare out of the window. The beautiful statue staring back at me. Colorful flowers dance in the wind around it. The water from the fountain jumps in rhyme around the stone woman.

"If you know something about tonight, anything, and don't tell me right now," Cole seethes into the men's faces, "So help me god, you will be the last in your family to die,"

"After watching each and every one of their deaths." Elijah finished the gory details of the threat.

I can see why they're friends

I can feel the tension in the air, I can feel that someone knows what's going on. I also know they know better than to rat on themselves. The rat in the room was going to die either way, but it seemed like we'd have to put some cheese out for it first.

I slip outside from the sliding doors, walking down the paved path.

It smells nice out here, it smells fresh. My mind is heavy from the lives I've ended today but at the same time.

I don't feel bad, I feel nothing

What I do feel, is unsure. I don't know what's coming next and I can't decide if I like that or not. Living with my mother, I didn't know what to expect, I just knew it would hurt. Right now I don't feel like that. I feel free, light but heavy.

I'm having an internal battle. Those people tried to kill me, yet I still feel bad. I don't understand my goal right now. I have nothing I'm working towards. Anything I use to want has been crushed because I born into an unfortunate family.

There's no way I can go to college. I didn't even get to finish highschool.

With all of that being said, do I really want to kill people for the rest of my life? I felt something last night - I felt alive. The feeling of adrenaline completely engulfing me is something I want to feel again. I wasn't scared in that moment. Life and death didn't matter. It was me against the world, in a different way than I'm used to.

My fingertips glaze over the flower petals, the sound of running water becomes more prominent the further I walk along the path. Finally, I stop in front of the enchanting stone portrait of the woman. Her eyes as soft as I remember.

My father killed her? Why?

Didn't he know they would retaliate?

Did he care?

I can't control my hand when it reaches up to touch the woman's arm. The stone is smooth, skillfully carved. I can tell it's kept clean. The vines that hug the bottom of the fountain don't reach the sculpture.

Sitting back on the bench facing the woman, I look around. At all the flowers, all the trees, All the small animals that hide between the scenery, all living in unison and peace.

Peace

Exempt, that's not it at all. The bunnies munch on the grass and the fox munches on the bunnies. However, the world still turns. Life still goes on and more bunnies and foxes are born.

I've always wanted peace, I've always thought that it was the answer to all my problems. Regardless, that's not how things work. Peace is an abstract word of an illusion. We thrive is chaos - I thrive in chaos; for that's all we've been given, that's all we've ever known.

Chaos comforts me, where I'm afraid the silence of peace would just be eerie.

"May the flowers remind you," The familiar velvety voice speaks softly behind me. He walks into my view.

"That's what the statue says," Cole gestures to the small carving of words in Latin at the base of the fountain.

I hadn't noticed before

"Remind me of what?" I turn to look up at him. He looks devilish as always.

"I'm sure you can answer that question yourself, Gatita" He glances at me with a soft smile.

(Kitten)

"Tell me about her,"

"About who?"

"Your mother, Cole, tell me about your mother,"

"Amazing."

The way he speaks of his mother melts my heart. I'm glad, he was loved by such a woman. No one should feel unwanted. It sucks.

"You want to know the funny thing," He looks up at the carved image of his mother, "I can't even remember her face, like her looking at me while she was alive. I can only remember her words. If the statue wasn't here, I'd probably forget her looks altogether,"

"Do you ever miss her?"

I didn't mean for my voice to sound like that. It sounded strangled like I had to force it out. I was just thinking about actually having a good mother, then her being taken from you in the worst way.

"Every day, Princesa," His words glide out, "Every day."

(Princess)

"I'm sorry,"

"It's not your fault-"

"I know but I feel like I have to apologize," I interrupt, "I know what it's like to lose a parent, especially the way you did."

He's quiet. Time passes but it's not awkward, I allow my mind to run. The beautiful women definitely belonged in this beautiful garden.

"Do you ever feel guilty?"

There's not even a pause as he knows what I mean.

"I don't have time to feel guilty and neither do you," His words are concise.

I just look at him, analyzing him, "You know," I stand up, "You're not as evil as people think you are."

He looks at me, sending me a smirk that's lethal to my heart.

"No, I'm much worse,"

I smile softly, "You think you are,"

"Ah, you think you know me, Princesa,"

(Princess)

"I don't know you, I just see what you show me and Cole Black, you are not the worst person I've ever met,"

"I'm murderer,"

"Yeah, I know,"

"Come on, let's go home," He takes his hand in mine, "Your brother is about to kill someone."

Yeah, let's go home

Our home

***

We arrive at the penthouse, Elijah stayed back at gang house to 'talk' with some of the men. I remember during the car ride the bitch at Cole's workplace. I need to tell him, but he's in such a good mood.

I look over at Cole, he's sitting on the couch. Gray sweatpants and a wifebeater on. At the same time, I don't want him to get hurt.

"Want me to cook dinner?" I ask randomly.

He stops scrolling through channels to flash me a smile, "If you want to, Love,"

Oh my goodness - Love

I just smile in return, starting to get the ingredients. I decide to make Carne Apache. Something my father taught me as a child. I also had the best dish on one of his business trips to Mexico.

Part of me did it to impress him, the other part did it because I love it.

The normal time is four hours but with the stove in his kitchen, that was probably made for a restaurant, it only took one.

Cole sighs from behind me, making me jump.

"That smell brings back memories," He places his hands on my hips, "I didn't mean to scare you, Ángel,"

(Angel)

"I hope you like it," I can't help but smile, "Go sit down, I can serve it to you,"

"Yes, ma'am." He whistles, moving to sit at the island.

I quickly place the meat on a tostada and serve it to him. My heart beats rapidly as he eats it. I have an overwhelming want for him to like it.

"Lord," He draws out, "Get you a girl that can cook,"

"Aren't you eating?" He asks after finishing his plate, going for another.

"I'm not hungry, just tired." Lie, I am hungry

Cole just shakes his head, "Eat, Princesa."

(Princess)

He pushes the plate I just fixed towards for him and grabs another. I don't deny again, because I really am hungry. It was good and food is what I need after a long day of killing people.

"Cole," I grab his attention.

He mumbles a 'yeah' continuing to stuff his face. God, He's so cute, but I need to tell me about the girl.

"Do you know the name, Egorov?"

He freezes.

"Why? Where did you hear it?" His body facing me fully now.

"You know your assistant? the one stationed at the desk, in front of the elevators," I begin, he nods, "While I was coming from the bathroom, I overheard her on the phone,"

I tread lightly, "She mentioned his name, saying she was trying to get close to you,"

"I know it's not much, but I wanted to let you know," I finish quickly, his face truly gives away nothing about what he's thinking. A small smirk peaks from the corner of his mouth.

"I'll let Elijah know," His teeth meet his lip, driving me insane.

"Look at my little detective," He praises, "What would I do without you?"

What would I do without you?

I don't think I've ever heard someone say that to me.

"I'm sure you could manage."