"Damn, look at that fine ass girl over there." Chris said walking up behind me as I sat at the vanity. We have just finished round 2 when we got to the hotel in NY.

I turned around raising my eyebrow up at him "Who are you talking about?"

Chris placed his head on my shoulder and my turned my head at the mirror "You!" He smiled before kissing me on the cheek.

"You know Chris, I been thinking a lot about what you said'. That I should quit my job so we can be together more and watch Mijo instead

of shipping him off to my parents."

"You're going to quit?" Chris asked in excitement.

"No, well not exactly. I was thinking of doing something else, I love kids and all but I want to do something that involves me being on T.V or something. I don't want to known as Chris Brown's baby momma, I want to be known as Brielle the . . . Something, I was thinking maybe something that makes me feel close to you."

He sighed. "Whatever you want to do I'll be happy with, it's your choice. Don't really see how that's going to bring us closer, but I'll support you." Chris said placing his face aside mine.

I grabbed his cheeks with my hands and kissed him. When we got to New York it was around 4:12 in the morning. We went straight to bed but we didn't do any sleeping, neither of us were tired afterwards. We were wired and high on life, speaking of high I haven't had me a blunt in a minute. Knowing Chris's dumbass I know he has some weed, together we laid in the bed watching the sun rise passing the blunt back and forth. The munchies came along, we walked the streets together fighting through the crowd to find chili dogs.

"Bri you have something on your face." Chris smiled

"Where?" I asked wiping my face.

"Let me get it," he reached across and licked the chili of my face.

I laughed pushing him off. "You're so damn nasty, let's go it's getting cold. If I known it was going to be this damn cold I would've packed better clothes, this is nothing close to Cali."

"What do you want cause you can get it all?"

"I don't care, anywhere. We're together so it don't matter, I just don't want to go shopping. That materialistic shit don't matter to me, they don't make me love you anymore than I already do. I want you to take me out, take me out to dinner, take me sight seeing. Just once pretend you don't have any money."

Chris knows that whenever I go out I like to wear lace dresses, he went out and surprised with one and even slicked his way to helping me put it on. You let this boy hit once and he don't know how to act.

"You learned some new tricks, I don't remember you doing none of that shit before!" He panted as we finished up.

I laughed as I made my way in the room in a towel, "Your eyes were buggin'!"

"Can't we just stay here?" He whined.

"No we can't stay here." I said mocking him. "You promised we would go out, now get your ass up!"

Chris was finally ready to go, he was dressed up and shave his nasty ass face. He handed me a bouquet of roses when we got in the car, it was a step in the right direction of what I was saying pretend you don't have money. For one night, I just don't want the best of everything. I want to live normal like everybody else, daddy always told me everything that glitters isn't gold.

"I tried the best I could, but I didn't want to take anywhere cheap and you look beautiful tonight so I didn't want to take you somewhere shitty. This is all I could find for you, we not ever going to get any peace in here if this is what you want ." Chris said pulling up to Red Lobster.

I laughed "This is perfect and it's even better that you listened."

Can't believe all the shit that happened last night. I'm entering in 2013 with a lie cause ain't no way in hell in hell I'm telling Brielle everything now, I don't want to hurt her and I don't want to lose her. At least I never thought I would like this. Even though Jasmine forced me to fuck her, Brielle won't believe that. All the trust she had in me will be gone and I don't want that to happen. I could see her walking out on me if I made the choice to screw Jasmine. But I put it on my son that I didn't want to touch her. I don't know what's going to happen to any of us now, anything is bound to happen at any moment. This lying shit has to go, cause now I'm not only lying to her I'm lying to myself and I'm lying to my son.

"Last time we came here, I was pregnant. And you're stingy ass wouldn't let me eat what I wanted." She smiled.

"If I would had your greedy ass would've caused our son to grow a damn extra finger or some shit."

She laughed, "I miss my baby."

"Every time we go some where you always talk about that boy, you can't leave him alone for one second. He going to grow up soft if you keep doing that."

"Nothing wrong with that, my baby is going to grow up strong and wise like his momma so when I get old and ugly he'll take care of me."

"Old yes, ugly never."

She smiled "You can be sweet all you want but you not getting anymore tonight, we been going at it like animals."

I smirked. "I didn't say it because I want sex, I said it because it's true Sploosh."

She smiled as her cheeks became rosy. "Don't call me that especially in public, you know how I feel about that name."

Date night was good for her but now I feel like everything I do is out of spite for last night. If she finds out she'll look back on these days and think that everything I given her so far was for feeling guilty. I don't feel guilty, I don't really feel anything truth be told. I left my phone on silent and locked so even if Jasmine did try to contact me I wouldn't hear it, I don't want to talk to her. I don't want shit to do with her she want to play these fucking games with me then okay.

"Those garlic biscuits don't have nothing on mine. I'm ready to sleep I got that Itis!" Brielle smiled.

"It's not over yet, I want to take you out around the city before we go back to the hotel you going to need a coat."

It was late and I just wanted to take her out around the city, we walked around time square and took pictures together and looked around at all the lights. I even took a chance and rode the subway, she wanted to live normal and it don't get much ordinary than that. When we got to the suite we were both wore out, I looked at my phone to see if anything came in from Jasmine and I was relieved she hasn't called or texted me once.

"Thank you," she smiled as we laid in bed together.

"For what?"

"Putting up with my shit, my attitudes, my Moesha moments. Waking up everyday to me, kissing me goodnight."

"Brielle . . . I - ."

"No let me finish, I notice that I don't say sweet nice things to you a lot. I would like to think if we didn't have Mijo we would still be together, cause otherwise I would be missing out on something so good. I used to compare guys to you after we had sex, cause after that moment I felt something for you. No one else would do for me, I couldn't meet anybody that was like you because there is only one Chris and that's the only one I need."

"Brielle I --."

"Just let me finish," she said laying herself on top of me looking me in the eyes. "I don't care what the tabloids say, I don't care what my parents say . You make me so damn happy that sometimes I want to scream, you also do a lot of stupid shit that also makes me want to scream. But I don't care about that. When I look at you I see something that nobody else sees. You bring something out of me that nobody else can." Brielle began to get emotional, but the tears wouldn't come she never cries for me ."You make me feel like I float on air, sometimes I want to hit you because I feel too open like you got my head so far in the clouds. Whenever you're not around and I look at Mijo I see a mini you, he's the one thing I have left from you. I love you so much and I don't think I will love anybody else the way I do you."

I caressed her cheek and kissed her, "I love you more."

She spent the rest of the night in my arms while Jasmine spent the rest of night in my mind. I tried to tell her but I couldn't get through now, the guilt is setting in. During the couple of of days leading up to new years eve we out, did a little shopping just the usual. The night of new years eve we went out on the street with the rest of the people, we stood there cold as hell and watched the ball dropped and traditionally kissed from 11:59 PM to 12:00 AM. Once the ball dropped we took the jet back to Cali, the next morning I picked up Mijo from her parents house. Her father brought him out and ain't say one word to me.

"Daddy I missed you! I thought you be here Christmas together?"

I smiled. "We did spend Christmas together, you spent it with Papi and Nana too."

"But I wanted you and mommy, I wanted to play with my toys."

"Papi and Nana had toys for you too."

"Santa gave me more home!"

"It's not about the toys Mijo, it's about the family."

"Then how come I wasn't home daddy?"

"Sometimes mommy and daddy need time together, Papi and Nana really wanted to spend time with you."

"You taken me somewhere else?"

"No where but home."