《Objection! Dear Love...》#22 Choice of the Heart
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"Nothing makes you hurt,
Like hurtin' who you love.
And no amount of words will ever be enough.
I looked you in the eyes,
And saw that I was lost!
For every question why,
You were my because..."
— "Walls" // Louis Tomlinson
ɤɤɤɤɤɤɤɤ
Finally things seem to have fallen into place and days are going better. It's been a roller-coaster of a year since Mishti first entered his office and his life; deep down it's been the journey of rising above years of shame, betrayals, pain and loneliness. It has been destiny's play to unite two broken souls to mend each other - those two whose fates have been written together even before they knew it.
Abir and Mishti.
Mishti and Abir.
"I have always been in a rush. I didn't know what it is to pause and relax or even what it is to feel something deeply. But look at this now, everything is changing even in this moment yet here you are - being the only constant star in my sky. A year is a long term; everything changed, but you and I remained the same. It's kinda achievement, isn't it? You've done this to me, Mr. Rajvansh. Quite an achiever you are."
"And you've no idea how blessed I'm to have you Mishti. You have no idea how pathetic I was before you came to my life. I always had aims but you gave me my purpose to live, if that explains how important you're to me."
Abir still remembers how Mishti blushed and hugged him tight, he can die a thousand deaths to live that one moment again and again. He's never been wise with words when it comes to expressing his true emotions. In fact, he sometimes wonders whether he has told Mishti even half of what he really feels. And then he looks at her and she smiles; that's when he knows it's not a dream and they've the time of the whole wide world to talk about things. He is thankful for each day, slowly but surely they are getting to it. Mishti is getting to it.
She is happy, she is herself.
Comfortable with herself, her vulnerability and her emotions.
And that's what matters the most for Abir - more than his own life, more than the three words they haven't exchanged yet. It is all about time; what's meant to be will be and Abir is absolutely happy with everything. It is all going fine.
It was all going fine.
Until an uninvited guest decides to drop by their humble abode.
Meenakshi Rajvansh.
Abir knows he can handle his mother alone, he knows that Meenakshi can cause no harm to him or Mishti or anyone for that matter. He's just not sure if Mishti is ready to face her. She's so fragile at this moment and still adapting to situations, things and feelings.
But his mother has to show up and shake their world when it is still building. How Abir wished he could click the "Remind me later" button for this one event and then focus on Mishti; when he's free he'd have sorted out this situation again. But oh poor luck! This is real life and there's no way he can make this pause. He really needs a little space but no, he's never getting it.
"Answer me Abir."
No I won't. "What do you want me to say?"
"I've been talking to you for half an hour now, what are you thinking?"
Trying to not explode my mind by listening to you, obviously. "I'm sorry, I got distracted."
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"What am I hearing Abir? Why is Vishambhar Maheshwari's daughter living with you?"
"How does it matter to you?"
"Did you even listen to a word I said?"
"Unfortunately, no." Abir snaps. "With all honesty, I didn't hear a single thing the moment you mentioned Mishti who is much more than just the daughter of Vishmabhar Maheshwari. And I can't believe this, you Mrs. Meenakshi Rajvansh is here after all these years, lecturing me on family, respect and love, that too not because you care for your son whom you left years ago."
"I care for you Abir and that's why I'm here. People are talking about this. It is the hot topic of parties these days - Abir Rajvansh is living with Mishti Maheshwari."
"Agarwal. Mishti Agarwal."
Meenakshi pauses in confusion and with all due respect Abir really hopes she shuts her mouth but well, he's wrong.
"Whatever Abir, my point is I do care for you and that's why I'm saying this. You're a man now, you don't need my words to judge right and wrong."
"Exactly." Abir groans.
"But that doesn't change the fact that I'm your mother" Meenakshi snaps, "And I certainly do have a word on this."
Abir doesn't say anything and looks like Meenakshi takes it as her chance. Good thing is no matter what she says, Abir knows what he needs to know. He's just waiting for a decent opportunity to get out of this unwanted conversation with dignity.
"Listen Abir, I care for you. You've always been the talk of the society but this time it's gross. They're assuming things. And I have no answers. You with that Mishti girl? That girl who ruined our lives? Don't you remember what her ridiculous father did?"
"That Mishti girl, who fought for your late husband when his own family had given up. That Mishti girl who cleared Mehul Rajvansh's name from all the charges."
"Okay fine, but still. People are talking. She never had a good reputation. I don't even know why your father at the first place thought of a marriage but my son, you know it's not worth it."
"It is worth it, Mrs. Rajvansh."
Meenakshi looks stunned. Abir swears the look of disbelief on her face doesn't bother him as much as he thought it would.
"I'm your mother Abir!"
"You were. But you lost that respect in my heart the day you chose to leave because your so-called reputation was at stake. You lost your position the day you chose yourself above your family. Of course you've a say in my life, you said and it's my decision what I want to do."
"You don't understand Abir. If you were in my position, you --"
"And now. You're again here because people are talking and you don't have an answer. It's always about you, your clubs, society parties and people acknowledging your greatness. Now ask this question to yourself, Mrs. Rajvansh, is this even about me or about your own image?"
"Of course it --"
"Is it really about Abir, the son you left long ago and now you've nothing to do with?"
Meenakshi's face falls down. Apparently she has no answers.
"Cool. I'll leave you here, you need some time to reflect on things and answer yourself. Have a good day."
"You'll regret this Abir."
Abir leaves the room.
~~~
"So you're telling me that you two aren't a thing. Okay, I get it. That's understandable." Nishant says calmly much to Mishti's astonishment. "But why?" He almost shouts and Mishti almost feels normal.
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"What's so hard to understand?"
"No, I understand whatever you said. My question is why are you two not a thing yet? What's taking you so long? What else do you want that poor guy to do? My heart goes out for Abir." Nishant sighs.
"How can you be so sure that it's me?" Mishti rolls her eyes.
"Oh c'mon babe, it's gotta be you. That lad has been sure about you since the first day. Even when everything was wrong he was sure. So there's no way he's the one." Nishant explains, "And I don't get it yet, you two have crossed the line of just friends already, yet you say he's not your boyfriend."
"Nishant please. Can we not have that talk now?" Abir finally speks. The thing is Nishant decided to surprise Abir and Mishti with a sudden visit; unfortunately his timing was so pathetic that he caught them snogging in Abir's cabin.
In short, the moment is ruined and now Nishant wants an explanation of something that's not even there.
"We're not in any relationship like that." Abir continues, "Like she's not my girlfriend, alright? We're just trying and let's see how things work out."
"Like dating. We're dating but it's not official yet." Mishti finishes.
"Yeah. That pretty much explains the heated make-out scene I had to witness." Nishant frowns. "You really love this silly girl Abir Rajvansh, don't you?"
Abir only nods, he's not going to say the word in front of Mishti.
"Mish, you better not just play around him." Nishant sounds so serious that Abir almost chuckles.
"What made you think that I'll ---"
"Don't get me started okay? His mighty mom is already threatening him and I don't want you to do anything stupid." Nishant sits on the couch, sighing dramatically. "You guys have been seeing each other for more than a year now, yet your dating phase is not finished. What kind of tragedy is this?"
"We were not dating --" Abir and Mishti say in unison.
"I get it, I get it. Now please give me a moment to process all this. Oh God! Here I was expecting your marriage invitation and there you go." Nishant sighs heavily. "So anyways, what did your mom's manager say?"
The room goes silent for a good two minutes.
"What is it, Abir?" Surprisingly it is Mishti to end the silence. Most Of the time she chooses not to speak until asked except when she's around only Abir. Not a big information but Abir would notice even the slightest changes in Mishti's behaviour - he ought to do that.
"Say it Abir, no more hiding stuff please." This time Mishti sounds different, serious maybe?
"No, I'm not trying to hide anything but --"
"Spit it out Abir. Now."
"Uh, okay. No. Mishti I don't want you to be bothered by this. You've--"
"What did she say?"
"I'm telling you Mishti, please --"
"Say it, Goddamnit."
"Mrs. Meenakshi Rajvansh doesn't approve if I want to marry you and she's threatened to give up on her shares in the company." Abir says in a breath, closing his eyes tightly. "And I'll no longer remain the CEO of the company, if I go against her wish. Her step-son, whatever his name is, will be declared the new owner. The Rajvansh Mension will officially be in her name. And some other stuff she said about reputation, image, property etc. That's it." Abir opens his eyes to witness the crestfallen expressions of Mishti and Nishant. No one is speaking.
Abir sighs, he doesn't even know why it's such a big deal for Meenakshi. All he knows is money and fame means nothing if he has Mishti by his side. He won't think twice before singing everything to his mom if Mishti chooses him.
"Is she even your mom Abir?" Nishant finally breaks the silence. "What's the issue with her? Why is she acting like you're breaking some law and she's some queen punishing a traitor?"
"She's been like that always." Abir replies.
"Why is she bothering so much all of a sudden? Where was she all along?"
"That's Meenakshi Rajvansh, Nishant. She comes when she sees her profit and goes when she doesn't need them anymore. In this case, she and her so-called image is at stake, according to her." Abir voices out in frustration.
"But why? I mean, this is your company Abir. How can she sell it to her step-son?" Nishant asks.
"I own the company. But she has her shares. The company was more like a family investment at first, when I was starting and she was there. According to Baba's will, I'd inherit 50% of everything he owned. But he was left with nothing towards the end." Abir breaths, how many times does he have to recall those worst days? "So my mother was the one who invested in my startup back then. She had her own business from her father. It was a good bet you see, who knew she'd leave us?"
"And now is the time she has offered you to return her favour." Nishant says sympathetically.
"The house is in her name already. I don't live in it anyways. So if it's gone, I don't care." Abir says like that's the obvious.
"What do you mean?" Mishti cuts him off. "What are you intending to say Abir? You don't care?"
Both Abir and Nishant turn to her in shock.
"Abir, she said if you marry me. The condition is our marriage. But guess what? We're not planning to get married anyways. So there's no problem. She has an issue with me, I understand that. It's me who is the problem. You don't have to lose anything."
"What are you saying Mishti?"
"It's simple, isn't it? Just tell her that we're not together anyways." Mishti looks down. "I'll leave your apartment immediately, if that's bothering her."
"What the hell Mishti? Just because she thinks that you're the reason I'm distancing myself from social interactions doesn't mean she's right. Everything I'm doing is for you and you can't be talking about leaving me." Abir immediately regrets saying that.
"So Mrs. Rajvansh too thinks that I'm a barrier." Mishti sighs, but she isn't surprised. "It's better if I leave then. I can't be the reason you're fighting your own mom Abir. I can't be."
"What? I was never on good terms with her, Mishti. It's been like that even before you came to my life. And us being together or not cannot change things."
"I'm serious. We aren't together, she should know that." Mishti almost whispers, "We aren't together, are we?"
"This is not the time for this Mishti, please." Abir snaps, "Let's go home."
"No. That's your home." Mishti looks up, "Not mine."
Abir swears he can feel himself freezing.
"You don't have to give up on everything for me. I guess this is a sign. I better be leaving."
"To hell with you Mish." Nishant yells. "All this for nothing? Seriously? I know this guy right here, won't even think twice before choosing you and you're saying this? At least take some time and think through it."
"There's nothing to think about. I can't make him give up on everything he has for me. Not when we're not even a thing."
"Really? Like really Mish? Abir? What a dramatic story guys. You've more twists and turns than an Indian TV serial for God's sake, do you know that?" Nishant says, facepalming.
"Shut up Nish." Mishti is just fed up.
"I don't have a say anyways. This is totally your personal matter. But you've to make a choice. Don't fool yourself Mishti Agarwal. You've messed up big time before, this is supposed to be your chance to get it right. This time you'll have to stand by him." Nishant speaks quietly to Mishti, "I know you think whatever you're saying now is right but I'm telling you Mishti, think through it. And Abir doesn't deserve more pain nor do you. And confess what's in your heart before it's too late."
"In fact, let's get out of here Abir. She really needs some time to think. Or else she'll again make a decision in no time and crash her fucking heart as well as yours." Nishant leaves the room dragging Abir with himself.
"But Nishant --" Abir tries to protest but Nishant cuts him off.
"No. For this one time, let her get her shit together. She really needs to think things through without your constant presence. Let her make a choice on her own for this one time. Trust me, she needs to do this."
And thus Mishti stands there alone with her never-ending whirlpool of thoughts.
She doesn't know how long she has been standing there staring at nothing until Kunal comes.
"Oh Mishti ma'am? Why are you alone here?" Concern evident in his tone, "I mean I saw Abir sir walking out of the office nearly an hour ago!"
"An hour?" Mishti finally looks up. She immediately checked her phone - no calls or messages!
"Are you alright, Mishti ma'am?"
"Not ma'am again, Kunal. And yeah, I'm fine. Just thinking about stuff you know. Nothing serious." She fakes a smile.
"Is it about Mrs. Rajvansh then?" Kunal asks and Mishti doesn't say anything. Kunal gets his answer. "Do you want to share anything?"
Mishti debates in her mind for a minute and decides for it. She really needs someone other than Abir to talk about it, someone who might see things from her point of view. And this is in such times when she despises her inability to start a conversation.
"May I say something?" Kunal asks, almost as if he can read Mishti's mind! Mishti nods immediately, thanking him in her mind.
"I don't know if it's relevant or not, but I know one thing for sure, even if this company is snatched from Abir sir he won't have to go down to the roads. It's not like this company is the only thing he has." Kunal says, "Abir Rajvansh doesn't need this company, the company needs Abir Rajvansh."
"What do you mean Kunal?"
"Mishti, I'll be completely honest with you. This is the time when you think over your relationship with Abir sir. It's not about if you're getting married or making things official or not, it's more about the assurance. Are you sure about this - whatever you've with him? Are you sure? Do you want to take things further? Because it's enough to play around."
"I'm not playing around. How can you even think like that Kunal? How dare you --"
"No Mishti, I'm not saying that you're playing around. Oh God, I just misphrased the thing. I'm saying that one day you've to make the choice. It's love, it's a matter of heart - you can't go on like this forever. I know I'm no one to speak between you and Abir sir but everyone here knows that he loves you and he's sure of it. And I know that you too feel for him. It's okay if you need space, he's giving you time to think. The question is, have you thought yet?" Kunal breaths, "And be it for Mrs. Rajvansh, but at least now you know making a decision is inevitable."
Mishti only humsd. Kunal figures she is thinking hard.
"There's no rush Mishti. Abir sir is not bothered by Mrs. Rajvansh anyways. They've always had this rocky relationship and there's nothing that can fix it. In fact, there's no need to fix it because it's been like that since forever. So you too don't need to worry about it. Yeah?"
Mishti looks at Kunal. His words do make sense. Some relationships can never be fixed and Mishti knows it well. She can never go back to having a perfect bond with Vishambar Maheshwari no matter what and it doesn't even hurt. Because they both have accepted things the way it is and it's fine by both of them - the occasional meet-ups and awkward conversations. Nothing can be the same again and they both know.
Same goes with Abir and Meenakshi. They can't go back to be the happy family they once used to be and Mishti is nowhere near the reason.
"But I can't be the reason Abir loses this company. He has put years of hard work into this Kunal."
"I know, but think about it. Will he be happy with the company if you leave him? Will you be happy to leave him?" Kunal softly smiles. "You're my sister, so I want you to be happy. Abir Rajvansh is not someone to run after money, fame, reputation etc. All he wants is someone to care for, someone to love. He has chosen you, over everything, the day he first saw you. I've seen him Mishti, he doesn't give a shit about what others think or say. Only the people he loves matter to him. And he loves you. If you leave him, the ego of Meenakshi Rajvansh will be satisfied. But Abir will be heartbroken. And I know that you know he doesn't deserve it. He wants you, only you. And if you feel the same for him, you know what to do. But if you don't, then please talk to him and clear things before it gets too late. It's better if you leave him with an explanation concerning your real feelings, not because of some stupid threat."
"What if something goes wrong?"
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