based off 12.10

lily sunder has some regrets

~*~

Juno walked into the library to see Cas standing at the boards they had set up to look for Kelly. She set her plate down, glancing at him as he was staring at the board.

"Did the board move without anyone touching it?" Juno asked him. "Because that's how you're staring at it right now." Castiel went to respond, but stopped when the lights began flickering. Juno furrowed her eyebrows, turning around to see if anything was there. She looked back at Cas as he was staring at the ceiling now. She looked up, nothing being there. "Cas?"

"I... Will be right back," he said. He walked towards the rooms, Juno standing there confused.

"Alright," she said with a sigh. She began following him, watching as he walked into the room that Sam and Dean gave to him. "Hey." He turned around to see Juno holding her arms out. "What was that?"

"One of my old angel friends named Benjamin sent a distress call last night. Someone's killing angels out of revenge," Castiel informed her as he looked around the room.

"Okay, then why are you in here? You don't really need anything besides an angel blade, right?" Juno asked him.

"Right," Castiel nodded. He opened a drawer, pulling out two angel blades. He handed one to Juno, then walked past her out of the room.

"W -- Am I going with you?" she asked following Castiel.

"No, that's for protection," he said turning to her. "Just in case."

"You can't say that and expect me to stay behind," Juno argued with him.

"My point is, Cas thought he was doing the right thing," Sam said from the war room as they walked in.

"I was doing the right thing," Cas announced.

"You sure about that?" Dean questioned him.

"Yes," Cas answered.

"Yeah? Well, I'm not so sure. And when the other shoe drops – "

"I'll deal with it. I have to go," Cas said walking to the stairs.

"Got a lead on Kelly?" Sam asked following him.

"No. This is personal," Juno said folding her arms.

"Meaning what?" Dean asked.

"Another angel. An old friend. He called out for help," Castiel said turning to them.

"Oh. Good old reliable angel radio," Dean said facing Cas now.

"He was begging for help and then he just stopped. I need to know if he's still alive," Castiel informed him.

"Yeah, and he won't let me go with him," Juno said tilting her head at Cas.

"Well, we can all go with him," Sam said looking at Cas.

"All of you?" Cas questioned as he looked at Dean. Sam and Juno looked at Dean as he sat there.

"Sure. Yeah, we could help. Gotta make sure you don't do anything else stupid," Dean said standing up. Juno rolled her eyes, putting the angel blade into her coat.

*****

The Impala zoomed down the road as the interior of the car was silent. It was so silent that it was unnerving and almost annoying.

"All right, who wants music?" Sam asked with a sigh.

"I'm good," Dean said lowly.

"You?" Sam questioned, Cas only groaning in response. "Okay. Cas, is there anything specific we should know about your friend?" He didn't answer, Juno leaning back in the seat uncomfortably.

"All right. Guys, you know what? This – this silent treatment thing, it's silly. Not even silly, it's kind of pathetic at this point," Juno snapped at them. "And it feels like there's more sexual tensions between you two right now than there is between me and Cas ever, and I'm the one dating him. It's not gonna work. Whatever we're walking into, we should, you know, probably have an actual plan." Castiel sighed in annoyance, rolling his eyes.

"What do you wanna know?" he asked.

"Oh, he speaks," Dean said. Juno hit the back of his head, Dean glaring at her.

"Enough," Sam said sternly. "Cas, you said when you heard Benjamin, he – he was screaming."

"It was, um... Look, Benjamin wouldn't call for help lightly. And he wouldn't put himself in harm's way if he could help it," Cas said with a sigh, obviously taking a hit at Dean.

"Wow, this Benjamin seems like he's pretty cool, you know. Like he wouldn't make any half-cocked, knee-jerk choices," Dean said taking a hit at Cas.

"Yeah, you know what I like about him? Is that he's sarcastic, but he's thoughtful and appreciative, too," Castiel said, taking yet another hit at Dean.

"Now what is that supposed to mean?" Dean asked turning to Castiel.

"Okay, okay, the road, road. Dude, watch the road," Sam said turning Dean back around.

"I got it," Dean snapped.

"Anything else, Cas?" Juno asked rolling her eyes.

"Benjamin is always very careful. Long ago, he found a powerfully devout vessel in Madrid, and her faith, it..." Cas trailed off, trying to find the words, "she gave him everything – her trust and her body."

"Wait. So Benjamin's a woman," Dean stated.

"Benjamin is an angel. His vessel is a woman. But it – it's – it's more than that. She's not just his vessel," Cas struggled to say the words.

"She's... She's his friend," Sam finished.

"Yeah," Cas nodded. "Benjamin would never put her in unnecessary danger."

"Okay, well, if this Benjamin is so careful, then what happened?" Dean asked him.

"I don't know. That's what I need to find out," Cas said with a sigh. The car went silent again, but it was all they had.

*****

"The police report is calling it a stabbing," Dean said to the man. Juno looked over at Castiel as he was staring at the burnt wings on the wall. She frowned at how disheveled he look, then looked back at the guy.

"Sure, yeah. That's the official story. I mean, I was outside, and... Dead woman? No blood? Come on. And these crazy burn marks? It's a cult thing, right? That's why the FBI's – "

"Get out," Cas said walking over.

"What?" the man questioned him.

"Get out," he said again.

"He means we can take it from here. Thanks," Juno said showing the man out.

"Yeah," he muttered.

"We'll call you when we're done," Juno said. The guy walked out, Juno turning back to Sam, Dean, and Cas.

"Dude. You all right?" Sam asked Castiel.

"No," Castiel answered honestly. "No, Benjamin and I, we fought together. He was... he was a gifted soldier. I don't know how this could've happened." Juno paused, reaching down and grabbing an angel blade from the floor.

"Got something. Looks like we had a little angel-on-angel action," she said handing the blade to Castiel. He took it, furrowing his eyebrows.

"This isn't Benjamin's blade," Cas said. He paused, grabbing his head as if he was hearing something. They all looked at him confused as Castiel looked up.

"What?" Sam asked.

"We have to go. Now," Castiel said walking to the door.

*****

Dean parked the car outside of the diner, the four of them getting out.

"All right, who we meetin'?" Sam asked.

"His name is Ishim. Before I, uh, commanded my own flight of angels, my own battalion, I served under him with Benjamin," Castiel informed them.

"And you think he knows what's going on?" Juno asked as she looked inside the restaurant.

"We'll find out. You wait here," Castiel said turning to go inside.

"Whoa, wait. Excuse me?" Dean questioned Cas.

"Ishim said to come alone. He doesn't like humans," Castiel said looking at them. They all looked around at each other baffled, then back to Cas. "If I plan to do anything else stupid, I'll let you know." They watched as Castiel walked inside, Dean turning to the two.

"If you complain, I will slap you," Juno said pointing at Dean. He rolled his eyes, beginning to pace in front of Juno and Sam. Juno tried glancing inside, but the blinds to the diner were down and shut.

"And you're gonna storm in right," Sam paused, waiting for Dean to turn around. He did, Sam and Juno pushing themselves off the car. "Now." They walked in, the bell to the door ringing. Dean found Cas, a smile growing on his face.

"Hey," Dean said walking to the booth.

"Dean," Cas said rolling his eyes.

"Feel a little left out over there. Scoot over," Dean said getting into the booth. Sam squeezed in as well, Juno pulling up and chair and sitting at the edge of the table.

"I said to come alone," Ishim said pouring two packets of sugar into his coffee.

"These are my friends – my friends who don't listen very well," Castiel said looking up at the ceiling to avoid eye contact.

"How you doing? I'm – "

"We know who you are," Mirabel said cutting Sam off.

"Check outside to see if there are others," Ishim instructed her. Mirabel began walking out, Juno beginning to get up.

"You know I'll just go help her," Juno said, then walked out of the diner. She began following Mirabel around the corner, being careful not to make any noise. A crash in the distance could be heard, Juno hiding behind a corner as Mirabel looked back.

"Mirabel, right?" Juno walked around the corner to see a woman stabbing Mirabel. Juno's eyes widened, and she quickly let out a warning scream for Sam, Dean, Cas, and Ishim. Sadly, no one in the restaurant heard her. It was like a faint creak to them. She was too far away. The one eyed woman took her gaze to Juno as the red head began backing up. "You're not an angel."

"You just killed my friends friend," Juno said beginning to back away.

"Oh, so you're friends with angels," the woman said stepping towards Juno.

"Uh, is this a bad time to mention I'm dating one?" Juno said sheepishly.

"Very," the woman said. Juno pulled her angel blade from her jacket, deflecting the woman's strike. She turned, grabbing the woman's wrist and twisting it hard. She grunted in pain, kicking Juno's knee. Juno screamed in pain, hitting the ground on one knee. The woman punched Juno across the face, but Juno maintained her grip on the woman's other wrist. The woman pulled her wrist out of Juno's grip, hitting her in the face again. She pulled Juno back by her hair, holding the tip of the blade against Juno's chest. "This next part is going to hurt, so I'd brace yourself."

"You sure about that?" Juno asked tilting her head. She brought up her hand, snatching the angel blade and sweeping the woman's legs. She went to stab her, but the woman quickly kicked Juno in face. The banshee felt her back come in contact with a wooden post as she crashed to the ground. She began to push off her elbows as the footsteps slowly walked to her. Lily Sunder turned Juno around, gripping her neck.

"One more round?" Lily asked.

"Oh, hell, yes," Juno said with a wicked smile. A scream escaped her lips, Lily grabbing her head in pain. The scream was louder than the first one, Castiel hearing it first. Upon hearing it, he sat up in the booth and turned to look at the window.

"Cas?" Sam asked confused.

"Juniper," Castiel said looking between the two. Sam and Dean quickly got out of the booth, Castiel running for the door.

Juno fell over from exhaustion, her lungs burned and her vision was blurry. The click of Lily's heels approached once more as Juno was crawling away. Lily turned the girl over, Juno chuckling a bit at the blood running from Lily's eyes and ears. Without another word, Lily sent the angel blade into Juno's chest. The banshee screamed out in pain, a regular, not high pitched, scream.

"Juniper!" Castiel called running through the alley. Ishim was right behind him now, Sam and Dean getting their guns from the car. Juno whimpered on the ground as she knew Lily would try and kill Castiel.

"Touch him and you die," Juno seethed at the woman standing over her.

"Then I guess I'll see you on the other side," Lily spoke. She pulled the blade out of Juno's chest, the girl yelling out in pain once more. Castiel heard her immediately and ran that way. He and Ishim saw Lily standing there, Castiel stopping in his tracks. Ishim stepped forward first to fight, ducking under Lily's swing. He turned, the woman scratching Ishim with her angel blade. He rose his hand up, beginning to smite her. When it didn't work, Juno's eyes widened in fear.

"You can't smite me, Ishim. I'm not powerless anymore," she stated.

"But how-" She cut him off by throwing him aside.

"No!" Juno looked from the ground to see Castiel taking steps now.

"Castiel. Kill her!" Ishim yelled. He broke out of the woman's grasp, Castiel slashing her side. She grunted in pain, Cas standing over her now.

"I know you," he said furrowing his eyebrows. She brought her leg up, kicking him back.

"Hey!" Sam yelled. Sam and Dean cocked their guns, pointing them at the woman.

"I don't wanna hurt you. I don't want to hurt any human. Just let me finish what I started," she said standing up.

"Yeah, not gonna happen, Patches," Dean said. The woman held up her hand, a bright light emitting the area.

"Can't see. Sam?" Dean questioned. The sudden rev of an engine made the two hunters look back, a white convertible driving away. "I can't see. Did you get a plate?"

"Yeah, I got it," Sam said squinting his eyes.

"Who the hell was that?!" Dean yelled. Juno rose her head slowly, watching as Castiel stood up.

"Cas," she said weakly, the angel walking to her swiftly.

"Juniper," he said cradling her head. Ishim stood slowly, anger beginning to grow in him as he realized Cas cared for Juno. "You're going to be fine."

"Why do people keep stabbing me?" Juno grunted out. Castiel hovered his hand over Juno's chest, a small white light glowing from his hand. Juno groaned in pain, gasping once it was over. She let out a huge sigh, falling back on the ground from how sore her chest already was. Castiel pulled her up, wrapping his arms around her. "Okay, Cas. We've got bigger things to worry about right now." He nodded, pulling back and studying her face for a moment.

"Why didn't you warn us?" he asked.

"I did. I was too far away at first for you to hear me," Juno said standing from the ground. "Then Nick Fury stabbed me." Juno took a deep breath as she looked down at her blood stained shirt. "Aw man. I really liked this shirt."

"Juno," Sam stated.

"Right, let's go."

*****

Castiel and Juno helped Ishim lean back on the couch inside the church as Sam and Dean just stood there. Cas sat on the couch as Ishim pulled up his shirt to look at the scar.

"Ishim, let me tend to your wound," Castiel said leaning towards him.

"I'm fine," Ishim said pulling his shirt back down.

"Ishim, how is she still alive?" Castiel questioned him.

"Wait a second. You know her?" Sam asked.

"Yes," Cas answered.

"You don't owe them an explanation," Ishim said looking at Cas.

"Okay, hang on now. Uh, One-Eyed Willy back there wasn't trying to kill us. She was after you. So talk before she kicks in the damn door," Dean snapped.

"Before the Apocalypse, angels, um... well, we rarely came to Earth," Castiel explained to them.

"Yeah, uh, basically never, right?" Juno asked.

"Right, except this once. Many years ago, there was an anomaly," Castiel said looking between the three.

"An anomaly?" Sam asked.

"They won't understand," Ishim said looking at Cas.

"Cas, what's going on?" Dean asked. Ishim and Castiel looked at each other, then went on with their explanation. They explained how they had gone down to Earth to search for a nephilim and its father. How Ishim's command of angels killed an angel for loving humans, and then how they killed an innocent little girl. The three hunters now sat in shock, Juno just staring at her hands. She felt like she was going to be sick.

"Cas, you, um..." Sam trailed off, rubbing his face with his hands.

"We completed a mission," Castiel informed them.

"Some mission," Dean said.

"It was horrific, but it was necessary. It was right," Castiel said shaking his head. Juno looked up at him, horrified with his words. Castiel noticed, a frown taking root on his face.

"I... I'm gonna be outside," Juno said standing and walking outside. They all watched her walk out, Cas beginning to stand up. Dean grabbed his should, pulling him back down.

"Not one of those times," Dean told him. Cas looked at the ground in guilt, then looked through the window to see Juno standing at the rail of the church steps. Juno stared at the ground before her as she shook her head. She couldn't help but wonder how much there was about Castiel she didn't know. She knows about everything from the time he met Sam and Dean to now, but before that... She knew nothing. No one really knew anything besides other angels.

Minutes later, Sam and Dean walked out of the church, Juno turning to look at them. They walked forward slowly, Dean placing a hand on her back in comfort.

"He had orders, J," Dean told her. "And it was a long time ago."

"I know," she answered with a sigh. "But it still scares me to think about what else he could've done."

"Yeah, me too," Dean said leaning against the railing. Sam rubbed Juno's back in comfort, then walked out to the Impala. Once he was gone, Juno looked at Dean.

"You should forgive Cas," she stated. Dean laughed slightly as he shook his head. "Dean, he killed Billie because he loves your family. He knows that you can all save the world over and over, without a scratch on the rest of us. He is saving you because he loves you, and Sam, and Mary. He cares so much about all of us, and that's why I love him. And I know it's why you love him, too." Juno took a deep breath as she looked up from her hands. "You're just scared, Dean. Of what could happen to him. Believe me, I am, too. I'm terrified, but I have to keep going because I know he wants me to. He doesn't want us to think about what could happen to him, he wants us to worry about the world. So I have to because if I only worry about Cas and the cosmic consequences coming with that broken bond, then I'll only ever be drowning in pain."

"I hear you," Dean said with a small nod.

"He really does love you, Dean," Juno said looking at him. "Probably because of so many things I wasn't there to experience, but I know there's reasons." Dean nodded, turning to Juno and hugging her. She returned it, shutting her eyes in content. He hit her back twice, then stepped back with a sigh.

"We're going to talk to Lily Sunder, that woman. You're welcome to tag along, but it seems like she doesn't like you," Dean said beginning to back up.

"I think I'll stay here. Maybe try to get to know the family better," Juno said with a small laugh. "It's not going to go well, but I'll try."