based off 11.21

all in the family

~*~

"What the hell's going on here, exactly?" Dean asked.

"I'm happy to... fill in the blanks, but maybe we should go somewhere where we could actually sit down," Chuck said with a slight nod.

"We're not going anywhere with you. Okay, how do we even know that you're really Chuck and not just some-" Chuck snapped his fingers, the four of them suddenly in the bunker, "-crazy spell or manifest...ation." Kevin Tran popped out from behind Chuck, a small smile on his face.

"Kevin?

"Guys! You're looking stressed," Kevin said, then looked at Dean. "Especially you. I-It's cool. Trust Chuck. Whatever it is he needs you to do, he must think you can handle it. I always trusted you."

"Yeah, that ended well," Dean remarked.

"How did you – Are you okay, or – uh?" Sam asked quickly.

"Um... Yeah, I mean, you know, given the circumstances," Kevin said looking down at himself.

"Yeah, I don't mean to interrupt. Kind of a plateful here. And, Kevin... you've been in the Veil long enough. It's time you had an upgrade," Chuck told him. He waved his hand in front of Kevin, transforming him into his soul. It ascended, going up through the ceiling.

"Holy crap," Dean stated.

"Want me to get you a beer?" Juno asked looking up at Dean.

"Yeah, that'd be great," Dean said. Juno smiled at Chuck, walking out of the room towards the kitchen. She grabbed two beers, then turned and walked out to the war room. She handed a beer to Dean as he uncapped it immediately.

"Okay. So, wow, um, Chuck – Well, I guess we don't call you that, huh?" Sam asked.

"I prefer it," Chuck said with a nod.

"Okay, uh, 'Chuck' it is," Sam said with a sigh. "I'm sorry. You're gonna have to, uh, give Dean and me a moment to start to process. We didn't even know you were around. I mean, we knew about Chuck, but we just didn't know about... Chuck. I mean, I-I-I was hoping you were around. I-I-I prayed and I- but I don't know if they got, uh, lost in the spam or if—"

"Sam?" Dean questioned.

"Yeah?" Sam asked looking back at him.

"Babbling," Juno told him.

"Okay," Sam nodded.

"I'm getting that not everyone's totally on board," Chuck said looking at Dean.

"Here's the thing, um...Chuck..." Dean said hesitantly. "And I mean no disrespect. Um... I'm guessing you came back to help with the Darkness, and that's great. That's, you know – It's fantastic. Um, but you've been gone a – a... long, long time. And there's so much crap that has gone down on the Earth for thousands of years. I mean, plagues and wars, slaughters. And you were, I don't know, writing books, going to fan conventions. Were you even aware, o-or did you j "I was aware, Dean," Chuck told him sadly.

"But you did nothing. And, again, I-I'm not trying to piss you off. You know, I don't want to turn into a pillar of salt," Dean argued.

"I actually... didn't do that," Chuck said.

"Okay. People – People pray to you. People build churches for you. They fight wars in your name, and you did nothing," Dean said as tears were beginning to well.

"You're frustrated. I get it," Chuck said with a slow nod. "Believe me, I was hands-on – Real hands-on for, wow, ages. I was so sure if I kept stepping in, teaching, punishing, that these beautiful creatures that I created... would grow up. But it only stayed the same. And I saw that I needed to step away and let my baby find its way. Being over involved is no longer parenting. It's." Chuck stopped, finding the words. "It's enabling."

"But it didn't get better," Dean said holding his hands out.

"Well, I've been mulling it over. And from where I sit, I think it has," Chucked explained softly.

"Well, from where I sit, it feels like you left us and you're trying to justify it," Dean argued with him.

"I know you had a complicated upbringing, Dean, but don't confuse me with your dad," Chuck told him. Dean looked up, hurt in his eyes. They all moved to the map table, Dean being a bit more trustful. "You have to understand this about the Darkness – she's relentless, a force beyond human comprehension. It's the only reason I came off the sidelines."

"Must have been great being her brother, huh?" Sam asked.

"It was the worst. Always telling me what to do, making me do what she wanted. I mean, you guys know how that works," Chuck said looking between the three. "I mean, you with Charlie."

"No, we kind of had to get along," Juno said with a nod. "So, where is Amara?"

"No freakin' idea. She's warded herself specifically against me. What have you come up with?" Chuck asked hopefully.

"Zip, and we've been at it for months," Dean informed him.

"Well...matter of time. I've always had faith in you... ...even if you didn't return the favor. Where's the guest room? I could use a shower," Chuck said beginning to get up.

"Uh, it's, um... just down the hallway – the fourth door on the left," Sam said pointing that way. Chuck clicked his tongue, getting up and patting Dean's shoulder. He began walking away, Dean turning to him.

"Hey, Chuck. You know that she's got Lucifer, right?" Dean asked.

"Uh-huh," Chuck answered.

"The way we heard it, um... last time when you bottled up the Darkness, it – it took more than just you. I mean, we heard that Lucifer was involved," Sam suggested in a confused tone.

"No," Chuck responded.

"No?" Dean asked.

"Lucifer was perhaps my greatest hope and my bitterest disappointment. Do you think if I could have trusted him for a moment, I would have put him in the Cage?" Chuck asked them. "And I wasn't gonna mention this, but thank you so much for springing him."

"That wasn't really the plan, um..." Sam said trailing off.

"Now, as bad as he was, after all this time in prison, he's probably worse. And by now, he could have formed an alliance with Amara. Not walking into that trap, guys. So, no!" Chuck told them sternly. He began walking away, then turned back to them. "Thus spake the Lord."

*****

Juno sat at the war room table as Sam and Dean had gone to Lewis, Oklahoma to talk to the only survivor of the fog. She was researching some other places that Amara had fogged out, the body count making Juno sigh and shake her head every time.

Chuck walked into the war room, sitting at the table and propping his feet up. Juno glanced at him as he held take out Chinese food in his hand now. She opened her mouth to say something, but just nodded. A few minutes later, she could swear she heard moaning. She looked over at Chuck who was furrowing his eyebrows.

"Are... Are you watching porn?" she asked raising an eyebrow.

"There's so much of it on Dean's laptop. The amount is alarming," Chuck said as he clicked through the computer.

"Okay, you don't watch porn in the same room as someone. You'd think you would know that," Juno said resting her elbows on the table.

"Alright, fine," Chuck said closing it out. Juno rolled her eyes, going back to her own work. Chuck propped his feet back up, beginning to watch curling. He started eating the take out rather loudly, Juno just tuning him out. Four pints of takeout later, Dean came down the stairs of the bunker.

"Hey, Chuck. We, uh, found someone. I think he's the next prophet," Dean said as Chuck looked away from the curling.

"Neat-o," Chuck said with a smile. He looked back at the computer, Dean looking at Juno who shook her head at him.

"Is that my computer?" Dean asked.

"I've never seen so much porn," Chuck said looking up at Dean. "Not in one sitting."

"It's – I'm gonna..." Dean leaned forward, closing his laptop. "So, uh, listen. He – He's – He's a little nutted out about the whole booga-booga of it all, so maybe just dial back the – the God stuff." Chuck clicked his tongue and gave Dean a thumbs up. Dean looked down, shaking his head. "No pants on. Sam?"

"Yeah?" Sam asked.

"Yeah,"

"All right, you're safe. Come on," Sam said lightly shoving Donatello.

"Donatello, good to see ya. Sorry about your cat," Chuck said standing and facing him.

"You – You know me?" Donatello asked furrowing his eyebrows.

"I made you. I made all of you, even the ones who aren't born yet," Chuck said digging back into the Chinese food.

"Oh, my God. It's you," Donatello said backing up. He hit Sam, then stepped forward holding a hand out. G-Good to meet you, Sir! Your – Your celestial magnificence, your –"

"He – He just kind of goes by Chuck," Sam said grabbing Donatello's shoulder.

"So, we good? Y'all signed up?" Chuck asked nodding at Donatello.

"Uh...I-I-I guess you know that I was an atheist, until 10 minutes ago. Is that an issue?" Donatello asked nervously.

"Not for me. I mean, I believe in me. But your skepticism is to be expected. I did include free will in the kit, Chuck said with a light chuckle. He stepped forward, hitting Donatello's shoulder. "Welcome aboard."

"Yeah, Sam, Dean, could I talk to you?" Juno asked, nodding to the kitchen.

"Actually, we've got another place to go. Tell us on the way there," Dean said walking to the stairs.

"Perfect," Juno nodded. She shut her computer, walking out of the bunker with Sam and Dean. Dean started driving, then turned the radio down.

"Alright, what do you got, J?" Dean asked.

"It's Chuck," she said with a sigh.

"He's a slob," Dean stated.

"Okay, yes, but there's more," she told them. "When you guys went to check up on that Amara lead yesterday, I wasn't at the bunker."

"Where were you?" Sam asked furrowing his eyebrows.

"I was with Chuck and Metatron," Juno confessed. Dean looked back at her as she had a frown on her face. "I didn't tell you at first because you wouldn't believe me. But now that you know it's really God, there's something you should know."

"What?" Sam asked.

"Chuck's not going to fight Amara or try to lock her away," Juno told them. "He's gonna sacrifice himself."

*****

The three walked into the bar, Metatron noticing them immediately.

"Oh, uh, barkeep, dos margaritas! Top-shelf tequila please for my amigos. Their treat," Metatron told the bartender. Sam sat on one side of Metatron, Juno and Dean on the otherside.

"Alright. We're here. Don't try to pull any crap," Sam told him sternly.

"And what variety of crap could I possibly pull? I've lost my grace. Look at me. I got nothing," Metatron said motioning to himself.

"Okay, why did you have to see us? What's so urgent?" Dean asked him.

"So, I, uh, notice you've been in touch with Chuck. A.K.A., you know who," Metatron said with a sigh.

"Yeah, yeah. Is this going anywhere? Yes, Chuck agreed to take on Amara," Sam said.

"He said that? Used those words?" Metatron asked them.

"Pretty much," Sam stated.

"Huh," Metatron said with a slight nod.

"So, what – he's not confronting Amara?" Sam asked raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, no. No, no, no. He's – He's going to – He's gonna...meet with her. Juno's probably already told you. He's just not gonna take her down. He's gonna... sacrifice himself. Let her do whatever she wants with him," Metatron said beginning to grab his bag.

"Do you really expect us to buy this?" Sam asked.

"No. Of course not," Juno said with a scoff. Metatron slammed the manuscript on the counter, Juno sliding it to Sam. "Here. Buy this. Ignore the typos, but read it. It's in his own words. It's not an autobiography. It's a suicide note."

*****

Juno walked out into the war room to see Metatron now sitting at the table with Sam, Dean, and Donatello. She nodded slowly, sitting next to Dean as she grabbed one of the bears sitting on the table.

"Okay. You said you wanted to help. Besides world-class douchery, what do you have to offer?" Dean asked looking at Metatron.

"Oh, nothing. I just transcribed the angel tablet and know all the spells. And I know what makes Amara tick. And I had a relationship with the big guy for eons. Shall I keep going?" Metatron asked rolling his arts. He picked up one of the beers to drink, Sam snatching it away.

"Ah! That's mine!" he said, then turned to Dena. "As much as I hate to admit this... he kind of has a point."

"I don't know," Dean said shaking his head.

"You need all the help you can get – even douche help," Metatron scoffed.

"And since when did you jump on the God wagon? You never used to give a damn," Dean said coldly.

"Well, I didn't – at one time. Now that he's gone all kamikaze, leaving us with the Darkness, I-" Metatron paused with a sigh, "I was by his side since the creation. He believed in me. If there's something I can do to help save him and his creation, then... ...uh, it seems like I should."

"The plan is to rescue Lucifer from Amara. Then he teleports us out of Amara's hideout and we convince Chuck to use him to fight her," Juno informed Metatron. She didn't like it, but it was all they had.

"That's your plan? Do you even know where Amara is?" Metatron asked with a scoff.

"Um, I think I might know where she is. I've been getting this vibe. Uh, it's like a ping in my cerebral cortex," Donatello said spinning his finger in front of him.

"Oh, so either Amara or a stroke. And how are we supposed to keep Amara busy while we're... liberating Lucifer?" Metatron asked looking back at Sam and Dean.

*****

Sam rounded the corner in the Impala, stopping in front of the water tower. He, Juno, Metatron, and Donatello all got out of the car, looking up at it. They began walking inside, Juno's eyes widening at how torn up and beaten Lucifer was.

"Oh, goody. Larry, Curly, Moe, Lydia. Search and rescue?" Lucifer said looking at Juno who was now standing below him. "Oh, wow." Metatron stepped up on one side of the wood, Juno stepping up on the other. "It's one of Dad's favorites. Your ticket finally got punched, huh? It's wacky, isn't it? One minute, you're...nobody. And then – Shazam – you're Joan of Arc. Let's, uh – Let's hope this ends better than that."

"All right, can the small talk. We're busting you out of here," Sam told Lucifer.

"Well, it seems fair since I wouldn't be here if you lunatics hadn't set me up to be grabbed by Amara," Lucifer said tilting his head at Sam.

"You're gonna help us take her down. If you say no, we'll just leave you here in Abu Ghraib," Juno said tilting her head at him as Metatron was chanting under his breath. Lucifer tried laughing, but ended up going into a fit of coughs.

"Say no? You see what she's done to me? Do I look like a fan?!" Lucifer asked angrily.

"Eeroh, mahday saytah!" Metatron chanted to get Lucifer out.

"Did you grab this from the steno pool?" Lucifer asked referring to Metatron.

"You understand you'll be working with your father. Is that gonna be a problem?" Sam asked stepping forward to Lucifer.

"That's family. This is bigger," Lucifer answered him.

"So, you'll table all the old stuff?" Juno asked jumping down from the wood.

"What happens in Heaven stays in Heaven," Lucifer told them.

"Kahtoh, mahday, tayroh!" Metatron shouted.

"Metatron, are we getting any closer? Dean can't stall forever," Sam said looking over at him.

"I'm – I'm – I'm narrowing it down," he stuttered out. "Sahboh, taylah!" Lucifer's body went limp as he began falling.

"Oh, oh! Yes," he said falling down onto the wood.

"Hey, Lucifer, zap us out of here – quick!" Sam pressured him.

"Oh, no can do," he said shaking his head.

"What do you mean you can't do it?" Sam asked with wide eyes.

"Temporarily grounded. Equipment malfunction," Lucifer said like it should be obvious.

"Guys, I'm – I'm feeling her! She's coming!" Donatello shouted.

"All right, we're out of here," Sam said. He grabbed Lucifer, pulling him over his shoulder. "Okay. Come on. All right, Metatron, come on."

"It's okay, Sam. You go," Metatron said looking at the door. Juno pulled Lucifer's other arm over her shoulder to help Sam, as he glanced at Metatron.

"What?! Come on," Sam said motioning for him to follow them.

"I'm serious. I got this," Metatron told them. Sam and Juno told, walking out of the building quickly with Donatello in tail. Juno opened the back seat door, pulling herself and Lucifer in. Sam got in the drivers seat, Donatello jumping into the passenger side. Sam started the car, driving away quickly before Amara could get back.

He was speeding down the road, Juno glancing back every so often to check if Amara was following them. He looked forward again, slamming on the brakes as Amara was there. He tried to go in reverse, but Amara held them back.

"You really aren't worth sparing. None of you," Amara said tilting her head. She rose her arm to strike the Impala, but suddenly it landed on the ground. The three that could move enough to look around were frantically checking their surroundings. They all began getting out of the Impala, Lucifer weakly falling onto Juno. She immediately pulled him up, following Sam and Donatello up the stairs.

"Where are we?" Donatello asked. They walked out into the war room, Sam letting out a sigh.

"Home," he stated. Chuck walked out from the kitchen, everyone looking over.

"Occasionally, I do answer a prayer," Chuck said opening a beer bottle. He looked to Lucifer who's head was leaned against Juno's shoulder. "You've changed."

"You've changed," Lucifer said trying to straighten up.

"Well, still... I'm really pretty much the same," Chuck told him. He clicked his tongue, a bright light surrounding Lucifer. Chuck healed him, Lucifer standing up straight. This is going to be weird.

~*~

I MADE A HORRIBLE MISTAKE

OH MY GOD

I PUBLISHED FOURTEEN

BEFORE

THIRTEEN

OH MY GOD

PLEASE FORGIVE ME

I AM SO SORRY

I'LL PUBLISH FOURTEEN AGAIN

TOMORROW

PLEASE FORGIVE ME

OKAY BYE