《Octavius (WATTYS 2016)》twenty nine | realizations
Advertisement
"Alessandra, please speak to me." I just shake my head. I've been moved to a hospital residence room, with pale paper covering the walls, and black sheets covering the bed. There is a mirror on the other side of the room, and the girl I see in the reflection is terrifying. It's not me, the girl in the mirror has hair in a million different directions, and eyes filled with the memory of death.
"What did Titan do to you?" He is whispering to himself, but I can hear him clearly, and it kills me.
I just shake my head again. I can't look away from my reflection in the mirror. I am pleading at the girl to help me, to tell me what to do, to choose a life different from my own.
"God damn it, Alessandra." He slams his fists down on the sides of his chair and I flinch. "Just let me fucking help you."
"That's the problem." I choke out, and my voice is foreign to my ears, the sound of tin cans being crushed under some stranger's foot.
He pulls the chair right next to my side, and grabs my hand in his. But I can't bring myself to return his squeeze.
"What is?"
"If you help me, it will hurt everyone."
"What the hell are you talking about?" His forehead is crunched into lines of worry and memories beyond his years.
"I-I can't." I cough slightly, little particles of blood shining on the white surface of my skin. My skin looks like paper, with the ink of red and blue veins bleeding through.
"Alessandra, please." His voice cracks a million times in so many seconds. "I'm going insane."
"You're going insane?" I laugh, my voice full of anything but humor. "Octavius, I've been insane for more years than I've lived. I was an iceberg, and I've been split in two, and now I'm just sinking further into madness."
Advertisement
"You're not insane." He hisses, grasping my hand tighter. I wonder if I would feel pain if my nerves worked. "Just tell me what happened."
I stare at him for the first time, but his eyes aren't gold, aren't black. They're the blue that I love, so dark and deep you feel like you could float for centuries in their beauty. Love is cruelly kind.
"He's alive." I croak.
"Who?"
"My father." I feel the ghost of tears and salt on my skin.
"What?"
"He's alive." I snap, and yank my hand from his hold, the warmth of his skin burning the ice of mine. "He's alive, but not safe."
"Alessandra, you had a bad dream, your father is-"
"I wasn't dreaming!" I scream, insanity dripping from vowels and consonants. "I was awake and breathing and dying."
"Who the hell-"
"Titan." I snap and the taste of his name on my lips sends me flying for the bed pan, emptying the contents of a shallow stomach. I feel his warm hand on my back and I shift away. I don't deserve his touch. I don't deserve his warmth.
He doesn't deserve to have a mate that would consider Titan's offer. Even for a moment.
"My father is a liar." He growls.
"I don't know how," I whisper, crudely wiping my mouth on the sleeve of my hospital gown. "But I know it's true. It has to be. He wouldn't risk lying if his request was that intense. He wouldn't lie about it. He couldn't lie about. Would he- no he wouldn't-"
I am muttering to a voice that cannot respond, I can't even be certain that I'm speaking aloud.
"What are you talking about, what request?" He grabs my chin, forcing me to face him. The sparks that once gave pleasure just remind me of how much I'm killing him, even now.
Advertisement
"If you won't tell me what he did to you, maybe he will." He hisses, standing up quickly, the chair emitting a piercing screech as it slides backwards.
"What?" I choke out.
He turns to me as he stands in the doorway.
"You are refusing to tell me what he did to you. So my only option is to force him to tell me himself." He turns to leave.
"Octavius!" I scream, kneeling on the bed.
"Yes?" He turns back to me.
I open my mouth to confess, my tongue so desperately wanting to form a statement filled with danger. Letters fall from my mind in Ts and Us, leaving me with a language even I don't know how to speak.
"I have to protect you, Alessandra." He states, his voice even and unwavering. "If you won't help yourself, then it is my duty to do it for you. I will protect you to my dying breath."
"Octavius-" I whisper, pleading with each curve and cross.
"Alessandra, no matter what you do, I'll do anything to save you from danger, because I love you."
"Then stop!" I shout, and my mind has jumped out of my body.
He freezes.
"Stop what?"
"Stop loving me!" I am screaming words that I have not seen, do not mean. But even still, they fly from my mouth like bullets from a gun.
His expressions are silent, telling me nothing.
"And why would I want to do that?" His voice is that of a machine, programmed to avoid the insanity of my words.
"Because it's just going to hurt you! Everyone I love gets hurt, and I can't do that to you. Not you. Just let yourself be free from me!"
What the hell am I saying?
What the hell am I doing?
Who the hell am I?
"Then let me die. I'll dig my grave myself if that's what it takes to love you. I will point a gun at my head, if it means I can save you. I will tie bricks to my shoulders, and drown in an ocean of black, as long as I know that you're mine."
I have no words. A dictionary that once gifted me with Xs and Qs has burned in the fire of his words, pages are ashes and letters are dried ink on cement.
"Please-"
"No, a promise made, is a promise kept."
And he walks out of my room, my screams following him down the halls.
Advertisement
Becoming Audacious After Marriage: Madam, Please Keep A Low Profile
A man leans arrogantly into the sofa with his long legs crossed and hands her an invoice. "Woman, I'll give you the identity of Mrs. Li." She reveals her deep dimples, and takes it with a smile, "I couldn't ask for more."
8 336Mourning Glory
A year and a half after Elizabeth's suicide, Sara Mera's life settles back to normalcy from a battle of depression. Sara's life is thrown back into that pit of darkness when her hand in the suicide is exposed to the world. In a negative state of mind, she meets the girl who was Elizabeth's best friend who is still suffering from her death. Afraid another tragedy will happen, Sara selfishly becomes friends with the girl but never expected that she would be the one who light's up Sara's world in the darkness. Bound by fate and desire the two develop a friendship they never expected and fall in love despite their wishes. - This is also a side story of another novel called Petrichor I've written so a lot of elements are left unexplained. I recommend reading my other Novel, In The Grass for the story of Elizabeth's Character.
8 97cherry flavoured
Loneliness is nothing new to Elena Kinsley. She had to grow up pretty quickly when her dad left her to work abroad, and she's taken care of herself from an unreasonably young age. Her only constant goal was success. Safe to say it didn't leave much time for fun, let alone relationships. In the summer before Senior year, Elena receives a job offer. Babysitting for a rich family in her city. Nothing could possibly go wrong, right? Wrong. It's not until her first day does she realise that the family belongs to Parker Ashford, Preston High School's golden boy. Parker is hot, stubborn, arrogant, and Elena can't help but be drawn to him, no matter how hard they both try to resist.
8 110Boundless
She - A Woman of background, culture and color. A woman who carries pride in her strides, and triumph on her shoulders. A set of thick lips of velvet , thighs of steel, eyes of molten honey, and skin smooth like butter, and roasted to a sensuous melanin complexion. He - A Man of proudness and honor. An anti-traditionalist, stripped of the ideas that were called righteous. Taboo marks his name, in blood his own blood that he cannot wash. His skin pale as the moon and rosy like petals of the spring, the spring that only SHE, can bring him to. He who finds great euphoria and bliss at the sight of SHE, who captures his bare eyes and stolen his manhood.RANKING:#5 in tradition - 2/20/19#4 in Korean Men - 3/18/19, 11/10/19#2 in No Boundaries- 4/25/19, 11/10/19#3 in Korean Men - 4/25/19, 10/30/19#2 in Asian - 4/29/19, 11/19/19#1 in Korean- 4/30/19, 5/8/19#2 in Korean- 5/6/19, 5/10/19, 5/15/19#3 in Korean- 5/11/19#1 in Korean men - 9/26/19, 11/25/19#1 in no boundaries- 9/26/19, 10/30/19, 11/25/19#1 in Asian - 11/18/19#2 in BrianKang - 11/25/19#3 in Asian - 11/25/19#1 in BrianKang - 11/27/19, 1/31/20#5 in undescribable - 1/27/20#2 in ambw - 5/20/20
8 202✓ Mianite One Shots
Mianite One ShotsI will not be adding more one shots in this for I don't feel comfortable writing about real people anymore.#9 - Mianite (01/08/2021)#4 - Dianite (01/10/2021)#2 - TomSyndicate (1/10/2021)
8 107Becoming the Elder Brother Of The Villain (BL).
Novel : Becoming the Elder brother of the Villain (BL)Author : AHNStatus : ongoingUpdate : Every SundayChapter : as many as I can write.Novel started : 21 Jan 2022_______________Gu Weicheng was a talented business man. who roared in the business world. And one of the Most talented and youngest Billionaires in the world. A person who was famous all over the world, for his intelligence, look and above all, his cruel and ruthless personality. No one dared to make him their enemy. But one day. Gu Weicheng was calculated by his own father, betrayed by his cousin and killed by his uncle . But to his surprise He transmigrated into the ABO-BL novel he recently read. And become the dominant Alpha big brother, of the Villain omega, who was in Coma for five years and died.What will happen when the character. Who was supposed to be dead in the beginning of the novel, comes back alive. And moreover he became a cruel, cold hearted businessman. Even the people in the underworld are scared and don't want to offend. A novel consist of romance, action, faceslap, family love, brotherhood, friendship, revenge, soul transmigration/rebirth and so on.................,.# transmigration# Seme mc# mature content (18+)# ongoing....-----------------------Best Ranking till now#bl - 10 (*77.6K*)#lgbt - 14 (*324k*)#Romance - 48 (*1.94M*)#seme - 01 (*2.29K*)#abo - 01 (*2.82K*)#maleprotagonist - 01 (*1.7K*)#uke - 02 (*2.33K*)#r18 - 01 (*3.75K*)#reincarnation - 32(*20.4K*)#danmei - 01 (*6.51K*)#transmigration - 17 (*7.36K*)#businessman - 01 (*2.58K*)#gong - 02 (*300*)#semeprotagonist - 01 (*63*)#shou -01 (*338*)#boyxboy - 46 (*288K*)#boyslove - 67 (*45.6k*)#reborn - 02 (*7.7k*)_________________________All the character and story are just imaginary. And the photos used here are not mine.Please don't upload the novel anywhere else.................This is my orginal novel, solely mine SoooooPlease don't re-upload without permission...
8 207