"Luke" the name came off my mouth, sounding surprised and confused.

Luke Henderson was in front of me, dressed casually in a navy blue tee and trousers. If this didn't brighten my day, I don't know what would. Please note my sarcasm. First and foremost, I had met the angel Seb was in love with, and now I had to confront the douche known as my ex, albeit my rage for him had subsided a little, after all, he did provide me a paid leave. What confused me, even more, was that he was equally stunned.

''Eli?'' He remarked gently, seeming confused. I was about to remind him not to call me that anymore, but he beat me to it.

''Oh, I forgot you were roommates," Looking down, he mumbled and I spotted a tick in his jaws.

You've lost your rights, dude.

I merely nod, not knowing what to say or do. We don't say anything for a minute, he just stands there gazing down at his feet, his hands tucked in his pants pocket as if lost in contemplation.

My stomach growled softly, turning me crimson, but when I raised my head to apologize, he still seemed extremely lost. As a nutcase, I decided to break the ice.

"What brings you here?" I ask, attempting to be polite. After all, he was my boss, and he had granted me a paid leave.

I must stop repeating that.

But I'm thankful for it, and even though I want to be a bitch to him and slam the door in his face, I decide not to.

Because I was grateful, and because I believe I am now ready to let go of the past. Initially taken aback, he gives me a tiny smile and says, ''I came here to meet Cindy."

Cindy. He's acquainted with her.

of course, he is.

I attempt to ignore the pain in my heart by putting on a modest false grin and saying, ''She and Seb have already departed for lunch."

''Lunch?''

''Yeah,'' I don't care how bitter I sound.

"But it isn't even noon yet."

''Yeah, I assume they simply wanted to spend more time together," alone I wanted to add, but I sounded so depressed that I didn't want to create any suspicions for Luke.

"Ah- maybe," he nods, "they are quite close."

And I didn't need to be reminded of it. Nonetheless, I nod.

We continue to stand there in silence, oh, this is so awkward.

"Do you want to come inside?" I offer, breaking the ice once more. His eyes sparkle and his ears perk up when he hears that.

''Sure, if you don't mind, actually- I would have left, but my car's engine died and-"'

"Luke" With a warm genuine grin on my face, I cut him off in his ramblings. When he's nervous, he rambles.

At least, one thing was real.

"It's OK, come inside," I reply quietly, opening the door for him so he can enter and I can step inside the flat.

As I turn into the kitchen, the loud thumps with a faint thud and I hear footsteps approaching behind me.

"Woah," Luke softly whistles as he stands in front of the kitchen mountain, hands put in his pockets, gazing about and taking in the interior.

"Is this your first time here?" I inquired, pulling out cornflakes and milk from the fridge.

"Yeah, I didn't visit him as much after he moved out," he adds nonchalantly as he turns back.

Moved out?

''Breakfast?" I ask, my gaze fixed on him.

"Nah, I already had mine, thank you," he declines, and I nod.

''What did you mean when you said he moved out?" As I mixed the cornflakes and milk, I couldn't help but wonder.

"I don't believe it's my place to say," he chides, and I nod. And I'm not sure why I'm interested, but I am. Sadly.

''It's fine, just curious'' I mutter looking at the bowl.

Luke gazed about the flat while I was eating my breakfast in the kitchen. And I was happy that things were not strange or unpleasant between us, even though I know that issue would be brought up at some point. The very notion causes me to emit a long, weary sigh.

We settled to watch a movie decided to watch 'Charlie and the Chocolate Factory,' which I chose mainly because there are no intimate scenes, and I know it's childish, but I would have been in a hell of an awkward position if I had to watch a sex scene with my ex, and thus we are here laughing boisterously at how that kid Augustus Gloop drowned in the chocolate lake.

''He reminds me of Logan," Luke chuckled, his eyes crinkling like they often do. His remark brought me to a standstill, and the same sense of deception and betrayal engulfed my emotions.

Luke glanced at me with a regretful face, as if sensing the shift in my mood but says nothing. I kept staring forward at the movie, but my attention was divided. Most of Luke's friends, including James and Logan, were also my friends, but they decided not to inform me about what he had been doing up behind my back.

Sometimes people treat me as if I were a garbage bag; they utilize me and then toss me away.

''How are they?" I asked quietly, gazing at the screen.

He cleared his throat, ''they are Well, James is currently in Mexico running his father's company and Logan owns a bar," he adds, and I nod, unsure how to respond. I'm not sure why I inquired about them in the first place.

''They miss you, Eli," he says so quietly that I would have missed it if I hadn't been seated next to him; I draw my breath after hearing that.

''They don't have the right to miss me," I remark, my voice harsh.

"It's not their fault-"

"then who's fault is it? Was it mine?" I gritted my teeth, rising my voice. ''Was it mine because I completely trusted you and never suspected, as other girlfriends would? Was it because I was a moron? What went wrong, Luke, and who was to blame?" I asked, my mouth clenched, the sense of betrayal coursing through my veins.

"Don't raise your voice," he adds firmly, revealing his domineering personality.

''Don't order in me in my fucking house," I replied angrily. He clenches his teeth and turns away.

''See, this is something you always do. This is what you've always done; ordered me around, using me to tick your girlfriend box, why Luke?" I sighed. ''Why? How many times have I told you that if you get bored with me, I would leave you, as long as you don't cheat on me?" I mumble as tears stream down my face, "so why did you?"

"You don't get it," he shouted.

''Then make me because I can't trust anybody longer because of you, don't you understand Luke? You weren't only my boyfriend; you were also my best friend!"

"That's where you're mistaken, Eli," he says with a forced laugh, as if he, too, is in the suffering,

"I was always your best friend, never your boyfriend."

Is he trying to blame me for his lack of understanding?

''what? You don't make any sense."

''Tell me, why didn't we have sex?" I laughed, I couldn't help the laughter that erupted from my mouth.

''It's all about sex, isn't it?-''

"It isn't because of fucking sex Eli, for fuck's sake, I went a year without sex because I was committed to you, and you fucking stole my heart from the moment you stepped inside that hall," he cries.

''Well, your version of love is messed up," I mutter, rolling my eyes.

"I know it's my fault that we broke up, but it was inevitable because you weren't pleased with me. You would have abandoned me anyway-''

''Stop, don't blame me, and what on earth made you believe that?" he clenches his teeth and sharply inhales, "Can we stop shouting and talk this out nicely?" I sit for a minute, close my eyes, and nod.

"I was afraid, Eli," he says softly. ''I was afraid that if you saw who I really am, you would leave me; I was afraid that you already felt embarrassed to have me meet with your parents even though I was always on my best behavior with you, always," he says and clenches his teeth as if attempting to suppress his rage.

''My refusal to allow you to meet my parents is a whole separate thing." He opens his lips to respond, but I beat him to it, as I quietly say,

''You were scared to show me a face I already knew existed," I remarked as I looked at him. He seemed perplexed, ''what?" he asks.

And without another word, I stood up and raised my t-shirt to expose the long scar going down my stomach, which was lighter and blending in with my body.

The light brown tint, which started off dark blue but gradually lightened, is blending in with my skin, much like how I seem to blend in with all the problems.

Because, no matter what happens, monsters exist in everyone; some simply conceal them better than others.