Can I have this Lando?

There was something about coming home to an empty house that was massively depressing and maybe because this was just another day in your life, there was something that needed to be said.

The smell of booze filled the dark room, the only light source the TV which was paused the moment the door opened. He was leaning against the doorframe, as though he would fall over if he did not. His eyes were rimmed red and there were tear tracks staining his cheeks.

This was not odd, just routine.

You tiredly rubbed your eyes. There had been a point where you would have screamed at him, cried, anything, but you were way past that, and you could not get yourself to care.

You could not be mad with him, he was not your boyfriend and he, apparently, found some sick pleasure into making that very clear every night again.

There was just silence, it filled the room like the darkness had done when you closed the curtains two hours before. Silence, Lando had found out not too long ago, was what hurt him the most because that meant you did not care, at least not enough.

Lando reached out towards the sofa, probably to make sure he did not fall over in his drunken haze and he clumsily climbed over the backrest and sat himself down next to you. His lips were set into a pout and he shuffled closer to you.

"Babes?" His voice sounded broken and hurt, like a puppy who had just gotten his toy stolen.

The anger suddenly flared up in your chest, a fiery scoff escaping your lips. "Don't babes me!" There was coldness lacing your voice as you stood up and he fell over on the couch, not even sober enough to hold himself upright.

His face looked offended when he looked up, holding his wait on his elbows as he looked up at you and maybe you felt bad because you had not meant for the statement to come out so venomous.

There was a long sigh and then your voice came out surprisingly calm, laced with exhaustion and Lando felt kind of bad because he was the one that was doing this to you. "Look- Lando – I'm not some toy you can play with when your bored or lonely, or- or horny."

Lando, he knew that and maybe he was slightly hurt by the statement which assumed he did not, knew. Taken aback by the comment he made a second attempt on sitting up and maybe the comment had sobered him up, more than anyone had expected. "I- I know that."

Your hands flew up in frustration. "Really? You have a weird way of showing that." The frustration had brought tears and maybe you cared more than any of you would like to admit. "I know we – this- Isn't something permanent, but you could at least – I don't know- acknowledge I exist?"

Your finger pointed at his chest, angry and frustrated with the situation that kept repeating himself and that's how you knew you cared, because if it had been anyone else you would have walked out of the door after the first time.

"Okay."

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Okay? That's all you have to say?"

Lando grabbed your finger and put it to your side, his hand gently settling on the side of face. "Let's make this – us – permanent."

If you did not care, like you said you did not, you would have walked out the door.

You did not.

You stayed.

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