"What made you think that was a good idea?"

"I like you a lot, I just thought you should know."

"Are you going to yell at me too? I deserve it."

"This isn't your fault, okay? I promise."

"I can't do this, just leave me alone."

"I've got you, breathe, okay? I've got you"

"Forgive me. not for my sake, for yours. Forgive me."

"Don't worry, that's what friends are for."

"I hate you. I really do."

"Forever, that's what we said right? Friends for life."

"I wouldn't have married you if I didn't believe it would last."

"We're not just friends and you fucking know it too!"

"Walk out that door and we're through."

"Yell, scream, say something. anything."

"I hate how much I love you."

"Why are you so jealous?"

"I can't breath"

"I-I need some time."

"Just please, be my best friend right now, not the guy I just confessed my love to."

"I think you're just afraid of being happy."

"We should stop pretending to be happy, when we're obviously aren't."

"Emotions scare me."

"You're so fucking hot when you're mad."

"Just shut up and kiss me."

"If we get caught I'm blaming you."

"Nope, not happening."

"I'm not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention."

"make me."

"Just pretend to be my date"

"You need to wake up because I can't do this without you."

"It's not a double date, we're just third and fourth wheeling."

"I missed something, didn't I?"

"I locked the keys in the car."

"Good thing I didn't ask for your opinion."

"I need a place to stay."

"The ladies love a guy who's good with kids."

"I'd kill for a coffee...literally."

"You're Satan, pure evil"

"How is my wife more badass than me?"

"Well, that's... tragic."

"I'm not here to make friends."

"You look like you need a hug."

"Welp, this is awkward."

"I'm not your girlfriend. Hell, sometimes I feel like I'm not even your friend."

"I can't believe you don't like Disney movies."

"You're so fucking adorable."

"I am not a toy you can play with when you're bored or lonely or horny!"

"How can you still look so attractive while crying?"

"I'm afraid that this conversation is going to end with goodbye."

"How drunk was I?"

Not everyone is out to get you. Stop thinking that. It's annoying."

"I hope I'm never stuck with you on a deserted island."

"Safety first. What are you? FIVE?

"Why don't you appreciate my sense of humor?"

"You're lucky you're cute."

"You're seriously a man-child."

"Oh god, I need a drink"

"I'm too sober for this."

"Please, tell me this isn't happening."

"I think she prefers you."

"Maybe if you weren't so damn annoying all the time."

"Baby, come on."

Any other requests can be left here