foot steps were heard by the door, making chan instantly pull away from felix. the two boys glanced at the figure standing and staring at them.

"changbin..."

changbin had wide eyes as he began walking out of the room. felix jumped out of bed to run after the boy, and made sure he was able to catch up to him.

"changbin wait!" felix called out as he grabbed onto the boy's arm to stop him.

"yeah?" changbin turned around, shocking felix. he didn't seem angry, he didn't seem sad, he didn't even seem slightly upset.

"wh-what?" felix stared at changbin, "you're not upset?"

"no, i just came back too early. it seemed like you and chan were still busy." changbin shrugged.

"did you even see what happened?" felix let the question slip from his lips before he could stop himself.

"yeah i saw, you two kissed." changbin said nonchalantly.

"why aren't you upset?" felix questioned nervously.

"it's not my place to be upset."

"what? you always get upset about things with chan and i though?" felix was confused by the way changbin was acting. to seem him not even slightly care actually hurt felix surprisingly, why isn't he jealous?

"i'm not your boyfriend right now lix, it wouldn't be fair for me to get mad. if i get mad at you, i'll push you away, i don't want to push you away. did you do it to get me mad?" changbin asked the latter.

"of course i didn't do it to get you mad, i did it for chan." felix stated adamantly.

"for chan?"

"yes, he asked to kiss me. he said he thought it could help him get over me." felix explained and changbin just nodded his head to show he understood.

"okay, i can understand that." changbin nodded again.

"but-"

"felix, it's fine. i don't have a right to be angry. especially not with the ways i have hurt you in the past." changbin explained to the latter.

"that's the past, this is now." felix stated.

"it doesn't matter bokkie, i still hurt you at one point."

"bokkie..."

"yes, i called you bokkie," changbin smiled as he reached over and pinched felix's cheek.

"you seem different changbin." felix said as he stared at the boy with adoring eyes.

"i hope different in a good way." changbin smiled.

"in a very good way." felix nodded as he dove into changbin's arms. he buried his head in changbin's chest and nuzzled as close as he could.

"how much closer are you trying to get bokkie? i'm still human, you can't pass through me!" changbin teased through his laughter, but ultimately he of course threw his arms around felix.

"impossibly close. i want to stay in your arms forever." felix said as he smiled brightly with his eyes lightly shut, and basked in changbin's cologne.

"you smell nice." felix muttered.

"well that's good. i'd hope i wouldn't smell since you're pressed right up against me." changbin stated.

felix slowly pulled away from changbin and looked up at the latter with a glimmer in his eyes.

"you and chan can be friends again." felix said out of nowhere.

"what makes you say that?" changbin questioned out of curiosity.

"you're different, he's different. i believe we can all get through this now." felix said with a hopeful smile plastered on his face.

"of course we can bokkie, im sure i speak for both chan and myself when i say this... we would do anything to make you happy." changbin explained to the latter.

"you know he loves me?" felix asked, that glimmer starting to disappear.

"i've always known. that's why it was so easy for me to get jealous over you two." changbin shrugged, and felix began to pout.

"im sorry..."

"lix, you have nothing to be apologizing for... but you should go get back to chan. i'm sure leaving it at a kiss isn't the best thing to do." changbin suggested to the latter.

"you're right... you're right..." felix nodded, "i'll see you in a bit?"

"of course bokkie, i'll never be far." changbin said as he rustled felix's hair.

"you're cute binnie."

"go back to chan, i don't want to blush right now." changbin huffed, and felix began to giggle.

"byeee binnieee," felix sang as he skipped down the hallway. changbin smiled as he watched the latter leave, he was happy since felix was happy.

then his mind wandered back to the kiss and instantly his smile faltered as his thoughts turned dark.

chan and felix kissed.

it hurt changbin more than he wanted to admit, but he couldn't change it. it happened and that was that.

he walked down the halls of the hospital, searching for his other friends to distract him from the war within his mind.

"bin!" he heard jisungs voice call out, and instantly he put on a happy front to make it seem as though nothing was wrong.

it was best for everyone's sake if changbin concealed his emotions. like always, changbin had to be the strong one.

a.n.

i'm having a sleepover with the love of my life rn

do i propose now or later?