changbin and hyunjin went running through the hallways of the hospital in search of felix. changbin didn't care who he ran into or the guidelines of the hospital he was clearly ignoring, he only cared about one thing in that moment.

that one thing was seeing felix.

he had to see felix for himself to convince his brain that the boy he loves was truly still alive. changbin would not stop until he found felix.

"changbin, hyunjin," jeongin's voice called out from down the hallway.

as soon as changbin saw the boy calling for them, he went into a full sprint down the hallway. as changbin went to run into the room, jeongin put his hands out on the boys chest to stop him.

"you can't go in just yet." jeongin told the boy.

"why can't i?" changbin asked angrily.

"felix's grandmother asked me to tell you to wait for her." jeongin explained.

"have you seen felix?" changbin questioned, grabbing onto to the boy's shirt collar, shaking him slightly.

"get off of him changbin!" hyunjin shouted as he ripped changbin's hands off of jeongin and stood in between the two boys.

"i-i'm sorry jeongin... i-i don't know why i did that." changbin stuttered out.

"you're worried about him," jeongin sighed, "it's okay bin. i get it."

before changbin could respond, felix's grandmother stepped out of the boy's room and into the hallway with jeongin, hyunjin, and changbin.

"are the rest of your friends coming?" she asked as she wiped away her tears.

"they'll be here after school." jeongin explained.

"r-right... you all should be at school..." she trailed off thinking abut how today should've been just another school day for felix.

she then shook her head to snap her out of her thoughts and back into reality.

"there's something you boys need to know before you witness felix in his current state," felixs grandmother started, "he has a scar... a very big scar... and it probably won't ever heal completely..."

"it's just a scar, he's still beautiful." changbin spoke up, bringing felixs grandmother to tears.

"i want to hate you but i can't when he loves you so much." she spoked as she wiped away her tears.

"im sorry for hurting him." changbin frowned, knowing exactly why she wanted to hate him.

"if you blame yourself for him being here, don't. this is no ones fault, you hear me?" she said to changbin with a stern tone of voice.

changbin just nodded in response, even though he secretly blamed himself, but he mainly blamed chan.

"but... when you go in you will see his scar from what he tried to do to himself. it's going to hurt to see him like that, and it'll hurt even more because you can't talk to him right now.

he's not awake, and the doctors don't know when he'll wake up.

all they know is he didn't suffer any brain damage, and they don't even know how he didn't. they said he's extremely lucky to be here with nothing else but a scar." she explained to the boys.

they all nodded with melancholy looks plastered on their faces. they felt the depressing air suffocating them as they stood just outside of felixs room.

they knew once they walked into that room, nothing would ever be the same.

"you boys may go in whenever you're ready. i'm going to go grab something to eat with my nurse so i can take my pills, please stay with him until i come back." she asked politely towards the boys.

"of course, im not leaving his side." changbin stated befor walking into the room.

a slight smile formed on felixs grandmothers face as she walked over to where her nurse was waiting for her.

she was the one who found and saved felix. thanks to her, he was still alive.

once felixs grandmother was off with her nurse, the boys finally made the decision to walk through the door into felixs room.

jeongin was first to enter, then hyunjin, and lastly was changbin.

each boy was horrified and saddened by the sight of felix.

his scar was prominent and showed exactly how desperate he was to escape this life.

"it's okay felix, you're still here. keep fighting, please. i'm here for you." changbin said as he sat on a chair at felixs bedside and held on tightly to the boys hand.

"he's still in love with him, isn't he?" jeongin whispered to hyunjin.

"you don't even know the half of it." hyunjin sighed, "i wish he knew his worth."

"who? felix or changbin?" jeongin responded.

"well, both of them. changbin doesn't believe he deserves to be happy or to be loved because of something that happened years ago.

and felix... well felix is in the hospital right now because he tried to take his own life. he clearly doesn't see his worth and it really hurts me to know that." hyunjin explained to jeongin.

"do you see your own worth?" jeongin questioned.

"maybe with your help i can start to." hyunjin smiled shyly at jeongin.

"is this your way of admitting you like having me around?" jeongin teased with a smirk.

"it is," hyunjin gulped from his rising nerves, "i just don't want us to end up like changbin and felix."

"denying our feelings to the point of destroying ourselves?" jeongin asked, being rather blunt.

"exactly..." hyunjin frowned, "let's go sit with changbin, it's not good for him to be alone right now."

"good idea," jeongin agreed as he walked over to felixs bedside, trying to ignore the fact he and hyunjin just admitted that they have feelings for one another.

however, it was true. they didn't want to end up like changbin and felix. they never wanted to feel broken beyond repair.

it was how felix felt. it was why he saw this as his only way out of that feeling.

it hurt felixs friends to see him lying in hospital bed from trying to take his own life. it was the one thing none of them ever expected to have to do, yet there they were, silently begging for felix to wake up.

a.n.

devil juyeon is a concept

AN ADORABLE CONCEPT

LOOK AT THIS CUTIE

WHATTT

if you don't stan... GO STAN YOU COWARD

my biases are changmin, juyeon, and sangyeon 🥰