the boys sat in silence after seungmin had left, hyunjin fiddled with his thumbs due to his rising anxiety.

"i have to go after him..." hyunjin stated.

"what? why? you're dating me remember? not him." jeongin looked at hyunjin as if the boy betrayed him, and in a way he actually did.

"i hope you can forgive me jeongin. i love you, i really do, but seungmin is still my best friend." hyunjin said as he placed a quick kiss to jeongins cheek before he too left the dorm.

jeongin sat there only for a moment before he left as well.

"well this did not go as expected." chan stated with a frown.

"this is why i hate parties. drinking is so dumb. all of us are dumb." jisung let out a heavy sigh as he rested his head against minhos shoulder.

"felix, are you okay?" minho asked as he looked over at the boy who had tears filling his eyes.

"mhm..." felix nodded.

"come here," changbin grabbed felixs wrist and pulled him into his bedroom, "why are you crying?"

"b-because you're mad at me." felix let a tear roll down his cheek as he felt his chest tighten.

"you're right, i'm pissed. you and chan are always together. it's like you don't even care about me anymore." changbin began to raise his voice, only scaring felix further.

"i-i do care about you, i p-promise." felix stuttered out nervously

"you can't even say it without stuttering, how can i trust you? huh?" changbin hit the wall beside felixs head, cashing the boy to let out a slight screech.

changbin looked at the terror in felixs eyes and felt the guilt start to consume him, but he couldn't stop. he was far too drunk to make any wise decisions.

"just get the fuck out felix, you belong with chan." changbin pushed by felix and went to lay on his bed, but felix wasn't giving up that easily.

"why do you do this to me everytime you get drunk?" finally felix found his courage and let out all he had weighing him down, "you blame me for all of our relationship problems and then you say studf as if you don't deserve me. and maybe you don't deserve me, but why don't you fix yourself instead of continuing to be a jerk?

wouldn't it be be easier just to be nicer to me? to comfort me when i'm sad? to be there for me when i need you?

why do you push me away every chance you get? how is this fair to me? do you not love me anymore? do you want us to break up?"

"no lix, i never want to lose you... but i don't deserve you." changbin stood up as he rushed back over the boy, placing his hands on each of his shoulders.

"stop saying that and start doing things to change it! stop being a dick all the time and just be nice to me! that's all i want, all i want is your fucking kindness." felix cried out. hearing felix curse was not typical, making changbin realize how badly he was hurting the boy.

"FUCK!" changbin scteamed out as he grabbed at his hair.

"changbin," felix placed his hand gently on changbins arm, trying to calm the boy down.

"changbin, you're drunk. just calm down, we can get through this. you just need to stop drinking, don't you see what it does to you!" felix stated.

"you're right, fuck lix... fuck... im so sorry." changbin now began to cry, feeling way overly emotional from the alcohol in his system.

"just calm down, okay? i don't want chan, i don't want anyone but you. got it?" felix said as he looked into changbins eyes.

"i got it lix... im so sorry." changbin sighed as they began to rest their foreheads against one another.

on the other side of the bedroom door, chan, minho, and jisung sat there in an awkward silence.

"did we have to play drink or dare?" minho asked as he face palmed, "i feel like we're all stuck in high school."

jisung just rubbed the letters back softly, agreeing with him, but he didn't want to make chan feel guilty for the game suggestion.

"im sorry... i just thought it would be fun to loosen up for once." chan sighed.

"you know that's not true, you were hoping someone would dare you and felix to kiss." minho glared at chan.

"you're drunk min, don't say stuff you'll regret." chan informed the boy before walking away to go sleep in his room.

"i guess its just you and i now." jisung sighed.

"im sorry my prince, you deserved a better celebration than this... i told the boys to get you cheesecake if you want to have a slice of that." minho tried to cheer the latter up a bit.

"yeah, let's go eat." jisung smiled as he grabbed onto minhos hand, leading the two of them into the kitchen.

a.n.

changbins little drunken episode was based on something from my own life

please don't hate changbin y'all

he's a very self destructive drunk, but he's not actually abusive or anything

he would never hurt felix, he's just super insecure and jealous so when he's drunk it all gets heightened