"I... um..." I started looking back and forth. "I like..."

"Sorry, but she's mine."

I turned around to the source. It's-

"I'm in no way, shape, or form, yours," I practically screamed at the person who claimed me.

The boys who held me 'captive' faces recoiled in disgust at the person in front of them. I don't blame them. Not even Tsunade wants that perv.

"But Naruko~" Jiraiya wined.

A girl walked into the clearing and was looking back and forth. Her head went first to the two boys standing in front of me and then to the white haired perv who had steam coming out of his nose.

She shook her head and tsk'd. The brunette pulled out a sealing scroll slowly and began to pull something out.

"Luna, what are you-" I whispered, not wanting to draw the boys' attention towards her.

Luna brought out her hand and stuck it over my mouth. "Shhh." I nodded and she took her hand off of my mouth.

She finished pulling out the object and I practically had stars in my eyes.

"I would say use it wisely," Luna started, "but... give 'em heck."

I snatched the pink pool noodle out of her hand and gave the blue eyed girl a devious smile. "Don't worry, I will."

Luna gave me her own evil smile and brought out a camera. "I'm looking forward to new material for my documentary on the pool noodle.

"Kukuku~" she laughed as she melted into the shadows.

"Kukuku~" I repeated, turning towards my prey. "Oh boys~"

All of their heads turned toward me at once and I saw a visible sweat gathering on two of the three boys present.

"What is that in your hand Naruko?" Haku asked innocently.

Jiraiya began to cough a little, looking nervous. "Now, Naruko, you don't want to do this."

I pulled up my mask and held up all ten of my fingers. "I'll give you ten seconds to run."

"Why do we have to run?" Haku asked confused, as the two men- no, boys, grabbed his arms and began to run away.

"10," the men heard a sadistic Naruko yell.

The three boys burst out of the forest and ran into Itachi, effectively knocking all of them down.

"Why are you guys in such a rush?" Itachi questioned.

"That's what I was wondering!" Haku exclaimed.

"7." Naruko screamed.

Itachi's eyes widened. Naruko only gave people 10 seconds when she was going to chase them down or attack with a pool noodle.

"Pool noodle?" Itachi asked fearfully. Shino nodded fearfully.

"6."

"What are we standing here for? Lets go to the Uchiha compound and hide there!" Itachi hissed, running for his life.

"What is going on?" Haku cried as he was slung over a sweaty Jiraiya.

Everybody ignored the poor crying boy and ran into the Uchiha compound.

"1," they heard Naruko scream.

"It's too late!" Jiraiya hissed, not wanting to alert Naruko of their presence.

"Behind here!" Itachi hissed, gesturing toward a stack of crates. Everyone dove behind them.

"Why are we hiding?" Haku asked with tears streaming down his face.

"SHHHHHHH!" Everybody hushed at the same time. Haku curled up into a ball and cried silently.

"Have you seen an old perv, a boy in sunglasses, and a girly looking guy around here?" they heard a female voice ask. "No? Maybe you're covering for them. Oh well, I don't blame you. I'll just find them myself."

'Oh ship.' All but one boy thought.

There was a large explosion and people began to scream.

"Where's Itachi?" Fugaku yelled. "She'll calm down if we give him to her as a sacrifice."

"I actually wasn't after Itachi, but now that I think about it..." there was another explosion. "I have unfinished business with him!"

"What Jutsu is she using?" Haku questioned.

Itachi turned toward the poor boy with a haunted look in his eyes. He grabbed onto his shoulders. "That's no Jutsu... That is the power of a single pool noodle, a technique created by both her and Orochimaru."

"What's going on here?" They heard the voice of old Hokage questioned. "Naruko has a pool noodle?!" Everything went completely quiet for a second.

"Did he stop her?" Shino wondered.

"Naruko... calm down." There was a large boom and more screams were heard. "Come now Naruko, it's your Hokage speaking to you... no... don't come any closer! Ahhhhhhhh!" There was another large explosion.

Everyone behind the crates were crying now. What do you expect? Not even the Hokage could calm her!

Haku suddenly stood up. "I'll distract her and you guys run."

"Haku you can't-" Shino started, but was interrupted by another explosion.

"I don't completely understand what going on," Haku stopped and used his arm to stop the debris from another explosion from entering his eyes. "But you guys do. This is the only way I can help you guys."

He turned to his fellow scaredy cats and gave them a thumbs up with tears in his eyes. "If I don't make it out alive, be sure to lay flowers on Zabuza's grave once a month for me. Kay?"

Shino, Itachi, and Jiraiya nodded and saluted him as he ran out into the battlefield.

"Hey Naruko, what ya doing?" Haku asked as he faced an angry Naruko weilding a pink pool noodle.

"Where are the rest of them?" she questioned.

"They... uh... left me behind," he laughed.

Naruko didn't looked convinced. "Tell me or..." she used her pool noodle to cause another explosion. "Get out of my way!" she screamed, charging at Haku.

"Time to go, why is that, he has distracted her effectively," Shino whispered.

"No, we can't just leave him behind," Itachi whispered back with tears in his eyes.

Jiraiya put a strong hand on Itachi's shoulder and gave him a hard look. "We can't just let Haku's sacrifice be in vain. Let's go."

Itachi wiped his tears away and nodded.

"Let's hurry."

The three boys abandoned their hideout and headed towards the Forest of Death. None of them realizing that it was probably the worst place for them to go.

"Kurama," Naruko called out to her Fox.

Kurama whimpered.

"Come out in your small form and sniff out those boys," she said with no emotion in her voice.

Kurama yelped. 'I hope Sasuke got away...'

A small, one tailed fox poofed into existence in front of Naruko and sniffed the ground. Kurama inquired, running towards the forest.

"Perfect," Naruko smiled, running behind him.

Now Back to Our Poor Boys...

"I'm starting to think that this wasn't a good idea," Itachi said as he killed his 3rd giant cockroach.

"No, this is perfect," Jiraiya exclaimed. "There is no way that she can get to us in here!"

"Would you like to test that theory?" Naruko asked, raising her pool noodle.

"Run for your lives!" Jiraiya yelled as a chunk of the forest behind him exploded.

"You guys continue without me," Itachi stated solemnly, turning towards Naruko. "I'll deal with her."

"No," Jiraiya argued. "You're still young, you need to live your lives. Please don't argue with me!"

"I wasn't going to argue, I was going to say that it was a good idea," Itachi stated.

"Good luck," Shino murmured as he hopped away with Itachi.

Jiraiya turned slowly towards Naruko. "Now darling, I'm your godfather..."

"Shut up," Naruko stated, using her pool noodle to get Jiraiya into a choke hold.

...

"I have an idea," Itachi suddenly yelled as they jumped away.

"And that is?" Shino asked.

"Have you ever heard the expression, 'You're not you when you're hungry'?" Itachi questioned. Shino nodded. "So all we have to do is give her a Snickers bar!"

"Not it," Shino murmured, raising his hand.

Itachi rolled his eyes at his Junior and pulled out a sealing scroll. With a poof, a Snickers bar came into existence.

'This should stop her.' Itachi thought while coming to a halt.

"Why did you stop?" Naruko questioned, raising her pool noodle.

"You're not you when you're hungry," Itachi stated, throwing the Snickers bar at her. "Eat this!"

Naruko caught the snickers bar and looked at it. "What is this?"

Itachi began to sweat. "It's a Snickers bar..."

"I'm allergic to nuts," Naruko deadpanned. The kyuubi chakra surrounded her and there was a dangerous glint in her eye. "You dare try to kill me with this?!" She screamed.

"No Naruko, I promise that-" Itachi yelled, falling to his knees. However, Naruko wouldn't listen.

She brought down her pool noodle on top of Itachi and there was a huge explosion.

Shino got a chill down his spine. "For some reason," he stated out loud. "I feel as if Itachi's plan didn't work."

Shino suddenly got a great idea and began to run towards the village and into the one place that would calm Naruko down.

Ichiraku's Ramen.

"One miso ramen, and quick!" Shino yelled, becoming completely out of character.

Teuchi nodded and got straight to work. A few minutes later, he placed the ramen in a to go box in front of Shino.

"Good luck," he stated. "Save this village and yourself."

Shino nodded and paid the poor man. He then began to sprint towards Naruko.

Shino came to a stop when he saw Naruko. "Naruko, I'm sorry for the way I've acted. I bring you a peace offering," he stated, bowing a 90 degree angle and holding out the peace offering.

"Is that... Miso Ramen?" Naruko questioned, inching forward. Shino nodded vigorously.

Naruko's pool noodle crumbled to ashes as she ran over to grab the Miso Ramen. She broke the chop sticks and with a thank you, she began to slurp down her food.

"Ah," she sighed in contentment. "Plus 100 points for you Shino, but minus 50 for making me angry."

Shino just nodded, not knowing what the heck she was talking about.

"Naruko, that was the best content I've got from you yet!" Luna yelled, jumping off a roof of a crumbling building. "Now I just have to- hey!"

Shino grabbed the camera from her and made some of his bugs destroy it. "No has any need to see that. Why is that? It's because I said so."

"Are you just going to let him do that?" Luna screamed at Naruko.

Naruko just shrugged and walked off, thinking about all the points that have been given out.

Shino: 50

Haku: -30

Gaara: 20

Sasuke:

Naruko then shook her head. "Why'd I put him on the list?"

Hinata: 40

'Shino's in the lead, eh?' Naruko thought. 'But it's not over yet. Believe it'

{December 19, 2018}

Thank you weirdly_lazy for editing!

I'm so sorry for the very late update. I had finals yesterday and I've just been busy. Luckily I did pretty good on my finals. I got a 93% in Biology, a 97% in English, and I have no idea what I got in World History. I probably failed it to be honest.

Anyway, thanks for your patience.

Oh, and this chapter is for our last contest winner... SplodingKitten!