《Finally Us》Insecurity

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It had been in the back of her mind for a while now and talking with him now, just made her want to do it even more. From the way she saw it, neither she nor Ross would be back in Los Angeles for months and after the new year, she was off to Italy almost immediately to film Soleste and he was back up in Vancouver. What was the point of having an apartment together when they would not be living in it for months upon end? Laura had mentioned moving out of the place during their flight back to Los Angeles from Toronto and now, on their flight from Los Angeles to Berlin, they were talking about it again. They had to do something, and she wasn't going to be throwing her money away on a place that neither of them were occupying.

His argument was that he'd still need a place to come home to when on break from Permafrost. Her argument back was that he could always go back to his parents, or crash on Riker and Rocky, or even better... crash Ryland's new condo that he had paid a pretty penny for. The youngest of the Lynch clan had just got his own place downtown that was just as gorgeous as the listing showed it was. Laura hardly believed it, but when they made the trip down there just the day before with Stormie and Mark, it was actually a really nice place. Maybe when she got a local job, they could explore getting a condo like that - one that came with it's own recording studio. How Ryland found that was beyond her.

Leaning her head back in the seat next to his, Laura listened to his argument about keeping the apartment. They still needed a place to come home to, there was packing all their belongings up and hiring movers to take it all to a new location that could be two miles down the road or fifty down the highway. She watched his hands fly all over the place as he made his point and how his lips moved a mile a minute as the words spilled out; but she wasn't believing anything he said.

"But isn't it better to be investing in a property that will pay us back somehow?" she pointed out. "I'm not talking about a house right now, but I don't want to be giving money away to a place that we're not going to be at. We can't sublet the apartment, Ross."

"I don't want to go back with my parents."

"I know, and I don't want to go back with mine," she placed her hand softly on his wrist. "But we need to come up with something or we're just throwing our money away."

They sat in silence for a while after that, his gaze staring at the tiny television that was flashing pictures of the news on the screen and hers following suit. They watched scenes of riots, of debates and of parades thrown for no other reason than to throw them while she thought of other options for their living situation. They would both be on the road until the end of October before he was back in Vancouver in November and after the new year, they'd head to three more cities for the movie's promo. They'd be out of the apartment more than in it and she didn't see the logic in putting money into something that she wasn't going to use. She bought her first piano when she was 17 and used that every day (or when she could get to her parents place - it wouldn't fit in the apartment), bought her new phone (even though it was now the grandfather to the newest version) and used that every day, and her car? Yea, used that every day. She'd rather have her money going into something that would give her something back. She wasn't asking him to get a house with her right now, but it wasn't not on her mind.

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She imagined that moment that would come. It would have four bedrooms, a basement that would double as their recording studio (a necessity for them both), a big kitchen that she could watch Ross work his magic, and a big enough master bathroom where she could have an actual clawfoot tub. Laura remembered her grandmother having one in her own home and she definitely wanted one in her own future home. She wanted a bit of land, but not a lot. She didn't want a palatial palace that screamed a celebrity lived there; she wanted cozy and something that said 'have a family with me here'. Nothing too far from things, but not a home on Highland Avenue either. Looking over at Ross again, she knew he'd be game for anything by the beach, and she would too. To see that beach smile on his face every day - the one that was a look of complete bliss - would not be such a bad thing at all.

Thinking about it even more, Laura knew she didn't want to spend over two million dollars for a property. Investing in a home is a big deal and it's an even bigger deal with you're already with the person who you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. Investing in a home was about equity and putting your stamp in the world as a family and knowing all the conversations and little fights they had had before about finances within the apartment - about the HOAs if they were converted to condos, about little repairs that the landlord would not wake up in the dead of night to come and fix (that one water leak was not fun at all) - and she could only assume he was on the same page as she was. She was confident that he was. She wanted to be able to paint the walls any color she wanted, blast music at three a.m. in the morning (within reason) and she wanted to have neighbors, actual neighbors that she could meet and get to know and become friends with. Not that she didn't have friends, because she and they did, but new friends were always welcomed.

Turning in her seat and looking towards the small window, she watched the plane glide over the clouds hanging in the sky - a sign they were closer to their destination. Over the next few days, they wouldn't be thinking about the apartment at all. They'd be in and out of German press and premieres before back on a flight to London in three days time. Maybe then they could revisit this topic and if he still wasn't budging, she could give him some incentive...it worked for her when she wanted to do the Flying Fish in Cannes, and for some other things. It could definitely work with making a big decision on their living situation.

It wasn't long after when they arrived at their hotel in Berlin, the paparazzi sending a million flashes their way as they entered the doors and escaped the circus that was literally steps outside. For this premiere, it would be her, Ross, Gale, Karen and Summer, plus Stevenson, who was arriving on a later flight because of a family commitment. While Ross was checking them in, she spotted the grand piano in the middle of the lobby and although she was tired and wanted to take a shower as soon as she could, she couldn't help but be pulled to the instrument. Maybe, just maybe, during this little downtime they had, she could spend it right there. On this bench; with these ivory keys. With no pianist taking residence, Laura slipped onto the black ebony pew and let her fingers slide over the white keys thinking about her meeting with Scott Borchetta just a few weeks ago and remembering his words.

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Show me two more songs, he had said. If they're as great as I know they will be, we'll work on a sophomore album.

His words had been music to her ears and she had wanted to share it with Ross immediately...although then, he wasn't exactly talking to her. Joining him and the others on the elevator and bidding them goodnight as they got to their room, she couldn't hold it back from him any longer.

"I met with Scott last week," she non-chalantly brought up, making him stop unloading things and turn around to stare at her. "We weren't talking then and I wanted to call you and tell you everything the moment I got out of the meeting..."

"You should've called me either way. This is great news, Laura. What'd he say?"

"I showed him the stuff that I had and he liked it. I'm technically back in, but need two more songs to present."

"Laura, that's fantastic."

"Really?" she couldn't hide her smile from him. She had half expected him to have more of an attitude about it, seeing as she had kept it from him for this long. But that was hardly the case at all. In between promoting the new movie, memorizing new lines for Soleste and him talking about his own music with R5, it hardly seemed like the time to bring it up. But she was glad she did.

"Yea. You're such a great musician and I'm excited for you," he tucked a chunk of her hair behind her ear, and placed a sweet kiss to her lips. "I'll never not be proud of you. You'll be on your final album in fifty years and I'll still be wearing my number one fan tee shirt."

If there ever was a line to get her into bed, that would've been it. Laura scrunched up her nose at him, holding back the urge to do just that before a big smile appeared on her lips. "10,000 points to Hufflepuff."

"What? I'm so a Gyffindor."

"Mmmm, no. You're a Hufflepuff through and through. Dedicated, loyal, kind and have the tendency to sweep me off my feet with one look. Hufflepuff."

Ross shook his head, kicking off his shoes after placing his own suitcase on top of the dresser across the bed and shedding his jacket. "If I'm Hufflepuff, you're a Ravenclaw."

"I was sorted into Gryffindor, thank you very much."

"You actually did that?"

"Betcha ass I did. Like I'm going to The Wizarding World of Harry Potter and not getting sorted?" Laura rolled her eyes, escaping into the bathroom. "You've seen my scarf and robes too."

Ross flopped back on the bed, already stripped down to his boxers and ready for a full night's sleep before tomorrow's spectacle. "I never thought I'd be in the middle of a fight about which Hogwarts House we'd be in."

"Fight?" Laura came back out, dressed in her own pajamas, but not ready to go to bed just yet. A long flight and laziness equalled the need for room service and she was hoping that she remembered some German from when Vanessa took it in her high school years and it's all she would say around the house. "This isn't a fight. A fight would be if you said I belonged in Slytherin."

Ross laughed, moving over and under the blankets on the bed. "Never," he said, smart enough to know never to put her anywhere near that house. "But you're a Ravenclaw."

She stuck her tongue out at him, whipping out her lotion and rubbing it over her legs and arms before sneaking the menu from the desk and heading over to the bed. Once she ordered a little midnight snack and the background noise from the television was lowered from the remote in her hand, she hopped on her knees towards him, kissing him before he probably knew what was happening to him.

"Thanks for being supportive about my music."

"I meant what I said. You are an amazing musician," he paused, getting comfy on his side of the bed. "I remember annoying Riker so much on tour because I was playing 'Layover' and 'Rose Water' to the point where he was starting to play the chords on stage."

She held back a laugh. "Really?"

Ross nodded, his eyes becoming heavy. "Yea. I remember going into 'What I'm Missing' and he was playing 'Rose Water' instead."

"I shall tease him immensely for that when we get back."

+++

The days in Berlin had passed fast, so fast in fact that they were all back on a plane headed to London in just the blink of an eye. With Laura off in her own world, doing her thing to memorize her initial lines for Soleste, Ross had switched seats with Karen so he could sit next to Gale. Since Toronto, he and Laura been constantly asked about their relationship and Gale was always the one popping in with the same thing he told press in Toronto. While Ross had been okay with that one instance, it was to the point where it was getting on his nerves and he was close to losing his cool with certain reporters who were insistent on getting the juiciest answer possible.

He recalled one just a day ago in Berlin who wanted to hear every single detail about how it all happened and nothing about the movie. The movie was what they were there to promote and he wasn't going to budge and give anyone access to his relationship with Laura. They wanted to hear about how they approached the sex scene and how their actual first kiss was something they did in character. They had wanted to know how he had tried to get her shirt off before she was ready for it while running lines. They wanted to know how she knew it was something more than just their characters falling in love and they most definitely wanted, or in their words, needed, to know about how he pushed her up against a wall and they both decided right then and there that this was going to be it for them. It was something he wasn't willing to budge on and telling media about the inner workings of their relationship was just not going to happen.

So when Gale started to speak up for the both of them on most of their interviews and junkets, he was appreciative, but needed to let him know it wasn't necessary.

"So, you don't want me to say anything?"

"I, we, appreciated, but you don't have to," Ross explained, watching Gale fold up the newspaper in his hands. "The media knows just what they should. That I love her, she loves me and we're happy."

Gale smirked. "I'm glad you both are still together and happy, but from experience, the questions aren't going to stop."

"I figured they weren't. I just don't want you always having to say something for us."

"I don't mind, you know," the elder actor told the younger, seeing his frustration about the situation in his eyes. "Ever thought of just giving them one little thing so they back off? It works."

Ross shook his head no. He'd thought of that; he'd thought of telling reporters about a little bit of his relationship with her, but then he nixed it. If he told them one thing, there'd be another thing they'd want to know and he wanted to keep it all too himself. He was selfish, he thought. Extremely selfish. But he was allowed to be. After waiting all this time to have her all to himself, that's what he was going to do.

"If I tell them one thing, they'll want another."

Gabe shrugged his shoulders, getting both sides of the reasoning. "I get it. Just...think about it. It doesn't have to be your entire history with her, because most of the media already know you two with the show. But, just a little thing, like how she snores or the gross way she spits. That's one way."

Ross chuckled, and those would probably work, but he couldn't tell a lie about Laura. She neither snored - at least didn't snore loudly - nor spit grossly. At least, he'd never seen her do that. For as long as they had been together and had known each other, he'd never actually been on her schedule with getting ready for bed. He was the one waiting last minute to brush his teeth while that was the first thing she did after eating almost anything - which explains why he was the one undergoing a root canal or two last year versus her getting a gold star and sucker from her own dentist. There wasn't exactly anything gross he could think of about her...except maybe...nope, there was nothing.

The rest of the flight didn't last long. Gale was back reading his paper while Ross anxiously flipped through the on-board magazine before they touched down on the tarmac. Their time in London would be a bit more spread out than in Berlin. They actually had a day or two to rest and sightsee, if they had wanted to. Seeing as he, and Laura, had been to London more than once and knew all about the touristy areas and the hot spots that everyone was likely to go to. He was already thinking about The Dublin Castle and Rough Trade in between their press interviews and photoshoots that were supposed to look like candids for print magazines.

Looking at his schedule once they got into their room at the hotel, he wasn't exactly sure he was prepared for all the things the entire cast was going to be doing. There was the big dinner the next night (after a full day of rest because Paramount liked them), then a full day of photoshoots for InStyle UK, i-D and Wonderland with the interviews the following day. The next day was the photo call and press conference with the premiere following; and the day before he was off to Oslo and her off to Miami, was another off day.

"Well, my dad just said that I suck at Italian," Laura threw her phone down after checking in with her parents like she always did. Even though she was way past the point of having a curfew and having to be home at a certain time, she always checked in with her parents when she was away internationally. He loved that about her. He, well, he wasn't that way. He probably should be, but he wasn't.

"But, you are Italian."

"I know!" her hands flew up as she took a seat next to him on the bed. "But, he probably has a point. He is actually Italian and I'm the one who chose to study Spanish in high school."

Ross leaned over and kissed her temple. "I'm sure you don't suck at Italian."

"Let me prove you wrong..." she joked. "Call your mom."

"I called her before we took off."

"You should still call her." She paused before taking the schedule out of his hands. "Is it bad that I'm already tired just looking at this?"

He nodded, pulling off his shoes that he should've done before. "It's okay, I'm tired too. I just hope no one asks about that article anymore."

She offered him a small smile. "I heard you talking with Gale about it a little."

"You heard that?" he turned to her, as she nodded. "Did you also hear him telling me to say something gross about you?"

Laura chuckled. "Yea. I would totally point out my weird thing about how I snack on grapes."

Ross laughed, forgetting about how she had to take off the actual peel of each individual grape before tossing the fruit into her mouth. To be honest, he had forgotten about that. It had been far and few between that he had actually seen her eat grapes, too. "That's not gross though. It's adorable."

"To you. To everyone else, they give me once overs and 'what the hell' looks."

Ross shook his head, getting up from the bed while heading towards the bathroom. "Still adorable."

+++

She saw the looks the reporters were giving her. The up and downs and the hesitation flickering in their irises. She knew what they wanted to ask, but knew they'd been warned not to. A part of her wanted to just let them go ahead and ask - ask about the story that was completely falsified and almost cost her the only relationship that actually mattered to her; but then again, she didn't want to get back into it. She had faced it, they had faced it, it was old news and everyone needed to move on. Laura was glad that she was in the round tables with Jenna and Summer and on top of asking the basic questions about the movie, she knew that if a question did indeed come up about that article, that those two would have no problem shutting the interviews down at that moment.

Laura, when you first signed on for this role, did you have any idea it would reunite you with Ross?

She smiled at the reporters' question. If she could count how many times she'd answer that, she'd probably have a million dollars. She shook her head anyway. "No, none at all. The project was so super secret at the time I auditioned and I don't think any of us really knew what the movie was even about. I just knew that Stevenson was attached to direct and I've waited a long time to work with him. As far as reuniting with Ross, that actually took me by surprise," she rattled off, smiling as she remembered the moment she saw his hair from across the hotel room when the entire cast first gathered.

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