a.n.

before you continue reading, i would just like to say this has been my favorite chapter by far to write.

OKAY HAVE FUN

niall p.o.v.

It's been two days since we have arrived. I have yet to go sight seeing and have a full conversation with Harry. I feel like the tension has increased greatly and I have no idea why. Or its just me. I don't know anymore.

It was seven o' clock in the morning and I was still in bed. I think Harry is in the kitchen because I have heard noise coming from the other room, kitchen-appliances-clanking-together noise. I didn't want to go out there to make my breakfast and have an awkward greeting. It's not how I want this day to start. My stomach was growling. I can't take much more of this waiting for him to get out.

Unfortunately, Harry doesn't come out of the kitchen so, I hop off my lazy bum and begin my way to the kitchen before I am stopped. Harry stands in the doorway, holding a tray. Eggs, bacon, toast, and tea.

"Oh. I didn't know you were up, I was going to surprise you with breakfast," he smiles sheepishly and holds out the tray. "It's all for you."

I was gobsmacked. He would do this for me? The only other person who would do this for me is my mother. Then I ask myself, why? Me, of all people. I wasn't complaining but, I was confused.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you." I smile and take the tray from him. "Did you, you, have breakfast, breakfast yet, yet?" I ask him, sitting back down in my bed.

"No."

"Eat with me, me, me." I look up at him and smile, patting the seat beside me. He gratefully smiles and takes the opportunity. My cheeks heat. Hes sitting so close. He takes a piece of toast and pops it into his mouth and moans softly. Dear me.

"I'm a pretty darn good cook, I'd say so myself." He proudly boast, taking another bite, smiling smugly. I smile in response. "Go on, try it," he says, gesturing to the bacon. I take a slice and bite into it. Holy cow. I've never tasted bacon this good in my life. I let out an involuntary moan, covering my mouth with my hand when I realized what type of sound I had just let out. My face turns bright red and buzzes with heat.

Harry doesn't seem to mind as he watches me, nodding to himself as if saying, 'I did good'. I mentally sigh in relief and continue to eat this delicious meal.

For the rest of breakfast, we ate in silence. Which, was nice, but I still wanted conversation amongst ourselves. I cleaned up the plate, tray and counters, making it all look spiffy clean. I smile when I'm finished and head back to my room.

"Get dressed," Harry says when I walk in. "I'll be waiting at the door." He walks past me with no explanation. I shrug and think nothing about it as I could dress into warm, comfortable clothes. Black skinny jeans, gray sweater and a black scarf. I go to the door, Harry opening it up for me. I mumble 'thank you' and walk past him to the elevator.

"What are we, what are we, we doing?" I ask him once we're both in the elevator. He looks down at me and smiles.

"You'll see." The elevator dings. We walk out and to the open world. People crowd the tight streets. I take an uneasy breath and follow Harry.

We walk around London for a bit. The whole time I follow Harry like a lost puppy. The people who go around us don't seem to even notice we're there, except, sometimes women notice Harry. It isn't surprising. Everything just becomes a blur when you look up at Harry. I don't think there are any words to describe him. He has this aura about him that just memorizes you and you have to take the time to look at him. I'm not the only one who sees that, too.

I run into Harrys back with an oof when he stops suddenly. He laughs softly at my mistake before pointing towards a building. The London Eye. I smile so wide I think my cheeks may rip. I've always wanted to go on the ride. I am soon the one leading the way as I make my way through the crowd.

"Wow," I gasp when we get up close. Its magnificent. I get in line for the ride when Harry tugs at my sweater and leads me to the front. I'm confused when Harry speaks into the workers ear. The worker smiles brightly and lets us in on the ride, alone, just us, nobody else.

"How did you-"

"Old friend, owes me a favor." Harry interrupts, showing his award winning dimples down at me. I look down and smile, my heart about to fall out of my chest.

The view is stunning. You can see on for miles. It takes your breath away. I'm literally speechless. We are about 100 feet in the air when I decide to walk closer to the windows. I look down and immediately feel dizzy. That was a mistake because we're high-really high. I stumble back and bump into Harry. I can't breath. I don't remember ever having a fear of heights. You've never gone anywhere high.

"Niall? What's wrong?" Harry starts to panic, as I do. I've seen enough, I don't want to be on this ride anymore.

"I-I-I c-can't, can't-" I wheeze and clutch to Harrys jacket. I want off. I try to calm myself down but my body doesn't want to do the same.

"Niall, Niall, look at me, look at me, please," I look up and look into his eyes. I almost lose the thought of what I was doing but the constant movement keeps reminding me where we are. I can't control how my hands shake and how I feel I'm about to cry. Harry wraps his arms around me tightly. My head goes into the crevice of his neck as he cradles me. I shake with anxiety, my legs giving out underneath me. We sit down, well, more like Harry sits down and I collapse on top of him, on the seat. My stomach drops as we reach the top and stop. Don't look, don't look, don't look.

"Niall, breath with me," Harry takes a deep breath and I try to do the same. My breath trembles, I can't even get a full breath in. I sob when my chest compresses. Harry squeezes me tighter as the ride begins to move again.

"Look at me, just look at me." I have trouble looking at him but when I do, I see him staring at me with something I can't quite understand, my frantic state can't apprehend much of anything at this point. I try to focus on him and nothing else but, it's hard. It shouldn't be this hard. Shaky gasp leave my mouth and Harry breaths deeply for me. "We're almost at the bottom, Niall, stay with me, you're doing great."

I look at all his features. The freckles I hadn't noticed before, the acne on his forehead, his plump and pink lips, his rosy cheeks, the natural highlights in his hair, and his eyes. His eyes. They are the lightest of greens. I think of the color green; grass, leaves, apples, plants. All of which hold beauty in a certain light. But Harrys green eyes, they hold beauty all the time. I can't stress enough how beautiful he is. He is absolute perfection.

My breathing has calmed down and I'm left sniffling. Harry helps me out of the ride, finding a near by bench to sit on. The breeze feels nice against my hot face. We sit next to each other but, Harry has his arm around me, tight. I rest my head against his shoulder, knowing this may be the only time I get to have him hold me in some type of way. I close my eyes and take in as much air as I can. It's hard to concentrate on breathing normally when his hand is rubbing up and down my arm and I can feel his breath on top of my head. This is what heaven feels like.

"You okay, now?" Harry ask gently, his lips sinfully close to my ear. I nod my head and smile contently. "You wanna go back to the hotel?" I shake my head, wanting to keep going on our adventures; hopefully not as frightening. "You want to find a place to eat?"

I find the energy to say, "n-not right n-now, now," and cuddle further into his arms. He accepts and we stay in that position peacefully.

✿

We must have stayed in that position for an hour before hopping up and walking to the closest bridge. It wasn't that bad of a walk. Harry made it pretty bearable. As we would be walking, he would brush his hand against mine, as if to remind me he's here. Complete bliss, it was. The wind was slowly picking up by the time we got there. Birds were soaring across the sky, singing amongst themselves. It was marvelous.

We were both standing near the edge of the bridge, watching the scenery when Harry turns to me.

"Have you ever had a job?" He ask randomly. I tilt my head slightly, shaking my head. He smiles slightly. "What's your favorite color?"

"Green." I say, blushing slightly. He would have noticed my blushing but, since my cheeks were already red from the wind, he didn't.

"Mines blue." He puts his hand on my cheek, his thumb brushing against the skin. "Like those eyes of yours." My heart jumps along with my stomach. Is this real?

"Uh, I-I- t-thank you, thank you." I manage to say, bowing my head. He chuckles softly, removing his hand.

"Want to head back to the hotel, now?" He ask. I nod in response, still not over his hand on my cheek. I can still feel the warmth.

The way back isn't bad. It wasn't short but Harry would 'accidentally' bump into me and I would have the energy to keep going every time. I still have no idea what exactly happened on the bridge. All I know is it was amazing.

The elevator in the hotel dings as the door opens to our floor. Harry walks out first and I follow. He opens the door and holds it open for me. When I walk in, Harry quickly but gently squeezes my side, making me squeal and giggle. I dash past him, still smiling. I must look like a tomato at this point. I take off my scarf and change into sweatpants while in the bathroom. When I come out, I'm still smiling fondly. What is up with Harry today?

Who cares.

I walk to the window in the bedroom, watching the ant like people walk beneath. They all seem so small from here yet half of them are probably much taller than me. Perception is a weird thing. It's used everyday whether we know it or not. You could use it in a meaningful way or like the way I'm using it now.

"What are you looking at?" Harry ask behind me, his chest painfully close to my back. I can feel the heat radiating from him.

I gulp, "those people." I point down into the street. He hums and hands me a mug filled with hot chocolate and marshmallows. I smile gratefully up at him and he smiles back. We stand quietly, staring out the window. A few minutes pass when I hear a muffled breath being taken, almost as if it was shaking. Next thing I know, Harrys chest is partly pressed against my back and his arm is wrapped around my waist.

✿

harry p.o.v.

Holy sh*t, I'm actually touching him. I can hear my heart beating so loudly, so loudly Niall could probably hear it. I'm trying to calm my rapid breathing. It's hard to do. Niall sucks in a quick breath, tensing up. Oh god, am I even doing this right? I slowly start to run my hand up and down his side, trying to get him relaxed so I know what I'm doing is alright. But he doesn't. Instead, he pulls away from me and turning around.

"What are you, what are you, you d-doing, doing? Is this, this a game, a game, a game? First, first, y-you're, you're hugging me, me, cuddling with me, with me, and now, and now you're acting, acting, acting like we're in, in a r-r-relationship, relationship. What's going on, on? You used to, used to hate me." Niall quivers with his breathing. A weight in my chest appears, weighing me down so much I could drop. He thinks I hated him? I'm now having trouble breathing.

"I didn't hate you, I never did. I was just conflicted-"

"Conflicted?"

"-about my feelings for you." Niall shuts his mouth, his hands scratching at his forearms. I grab them with my hands. "I didn't want to get too close to you. But now I know the truth, and I finally accepted it and I had no other way to show you except this way." I lead him to the bed and let him sit down, his forearms still held in my hands.

"You could, could have just told me, told me, told me." He looks away from my gaze, his interest now on the window.

"I like you. How was that?" I smile wide, hopefully easing his heavy heart. He looks at me and gives me a small smile, blushing a bit.

In all honesty, I probably wouldn't have invited Niall to go with me to London if it wasn't for David. He had randomly came to my work one day, papers in his hand. It was documents from Nialls diagnostics when he was young. I didn't believe he had OCD until then. It was ridiculous of me to assume he was lying and to be so cold to him. It's not so easy for me to believe everything everyone says all the time. After that, I realized there wasn't anything else holding me back from going for it with Niall.

"I like, I like you, too, too."

✿

a.n.

i just realized on october 22 this book will have been up for a year

thats not good omg im so sorry

ive been dragging you guys over this book for almost a year

and were only on chapter 17

:0

asjkdhkjfhhkbdviabsiuaehrnocmalskxmoneiwoeihtoiognonv omg

few more chapters :(((((