a.n HEY GUYS WOW I MADE A QUICK UPDATE RIGHT, well youre right but also because its PROCLIVITY WEDNESDAY im making it a new thing. anywho, if you guys can get 200 reads, 40 votes and 10 comments on this chapter ill make it a double update so you wont have to wait till next week. WOW ISABEL YOU WOULD DO THAT FOR US why yes, yes i would

anywho, enjoyyyyy xxxxxx.

niall p.o.v

"I'm confused," I whispered to Bonnie, her eyes staring up at me. I couldn't take her seriously, especially with that cute new sweater. Though, I try, "I shouldn't, shouldn't be attracted, attracted, attracted to a guy, guy. I should have feelings, feelings for a girl, right, right, right?" Bonnie just shook before walking off into the living room. I lay down on my bed, resting on my back. My life is a complete mess right now, my schedule is ruined, I have been cleaning up unholy messes, my repeating has gotten worse since that isn't my main focus right now.

I need somebody to talk to.

I decide to dial up my mum. Being the protective mother she is, she answers on the second ring, "Hi my darling!" She excitedly answers.

"Hi, hi, are you busy, busy, busy?" I scratch my frearms, hoping she isn't at work or at something important.

"No, never for you. Why? Is something wrong, Niall?" I can practically see her pacing the room.

"Nothings, nothings really wrong, wrong I just need, need, need someone to talk, talk to,"

"Spill your heart out, I'm listening," she says softly.

"There's this guy, guy, guy. I'm so confused mum, he's a complete, complete jerk I mean he thinks I stutter, stutter, stutter for the fun of it, I even told, told him I had OCD and he thought I, I, I was joking. Who does that, mum, mum? But then when, when, when I found this dog, dog on the side of the, the street, I kinda freaked out and Harry was, was, was, was there and I invited him, him into my house because, because I had no idea how to take care, care of a dog and he gave me advice and then the next moment I was staring at him and he looked so attractive, attractive, attractive, attractive to me and I accidentally said it out, out loud and he said he didn't swing, swing that way and I got embarrassed and it was awful because, because I said that to a guy and I should be liking girls, girls, girls not guys," I took a deep breath, almost panting from saying that all in a couple sentences. I spilled my heart out and saying it all made me feel so much better. Its like a weight was lifted.

"Wait, before we go any further, are you saying you like boys?" I heard my mum say faintly over the line, like she was breathless.

I had to think a little about that. I have never had an interest in girls. Though, I never really had any body interested in me, it just never felt right. But I always heard that boys liking boys was wrong, or girls liking girls. So I always assumed when I found the right girl, I would feel something.

I never felt something for anybody until now. But I don't even know why I'm feeling this way for him. It's just there.

"I-I-I d-don't, don't k-know. I don't even, even, even know how, how I'm feeling, feeling. Is this even legal, legal?" I scratched at my forearms even harder, most likely leaving marks.

"Niall, calm down. Take deep breaths," I followed her instructions, "if you like boys, and that's how you truly feel, that's how your heart feels, then that's the best thing for yourself. Love is not narrow minded. Love is open to anybody and to anything. People can not say who you have to love and who you can't. I know it's hard to be open about this, especially when you've heard different. But honey, I'll always be here for you, I'll always support your love. And about this guy. He may have never come in contact with somebody with a disorder before, I'm not saying he's right for saying you don't, but may be he's confused. He also may be confused about how he feels. If you have actual feelings for Harry, don't let anything hold you back. But if he does hurt you, I'll make sure to kick his butt back in place," by the end of it, I was were crying. That was the most inspiring thing I've heard. This was an eye opener for me.

"T-t-thank y-you, you," I smile so brightly I feel as if my cheeks will rip. I don't think I can even begin to think of words to thank my mother for the words she's given me. Her speech as given me strength, enough strength to be confident in who I like. I like boys.

"Are you crying?" I hear my mum sniffle over the line, laughing slightly.

"I'm crying because, because I'm not confused, confused anymore. I feel as if, if I broke through chains, chains and I'm-I'm s-so happy," I jump up out of my bed and pull on some sweatpants, "I love, love, love you, mum. I have to, to do something. Bye," I put on a jacket and practically run out the door after petting Bonnie for a few seconds. I know I am ending it quick but I just have to do something. That and I'll call my mum back later so win win.

"I love you too, baby. Before you go, if you need anything, I'll be here. I'm also here for dog sitting," she laughs before saying good bye and hanging up.

I shove my phone in my pocket and run as fast as I can towards the park.

I see a figure sitting on my bench and I immediately know who it is, "David! David!" I shout, waving my hands up in the air.

He looks up at me and waves back, almost unsurely. "Uh, hi Niall."

"I-I-you won't, won't judge me right? Are you open-open minded?" I stop in front of him and pant slightly. I really need to get into shape. But I hate sweating.

"Yeah, yeah I guess. Why ask?" David nervously scratches the back of his neck.

"Okay, okay, I-I need your help."

"Okay, what's up?"

"I like boys, boys," I smile brightly and take a deep breath. It's out there.

David's jaw drops and he stumbles over his words, "you're gay?" he practically shouts.

I begin to scratch my forearms, "y-yeah, is that, that okay? Can we still, still be f-friends because I need, need help." I begin to second guess my out burst.

David blinks and looks away for a moment. I ruined our friendship, didn't I?

He soon begins to nod his head, "hey, I'm okay with it as long as you don't make a move on me," he looks up at me and smiles, his smile almost as big as mine. "But you said you need help. Do you need help with liking boys..? I know I'm your friend and all but I don't want to experiment."

"What, what, what? No!" I scrunch up my nose at the thought, "thats, that's weird."

"Then what's the problem?" David sighs in relief, leaning back on the bench.

I sit down next to him, whispering, "there's this, this guy. And I, I thought, thought since you're a guy, guy, you could help?"

David whispers back, "I don't know if I can help but I guess I can try. What's the situation?"

"He doesn't, doesn't really acknowledge me, me. He thinks, thinks I'm faking the OCD, OCD O-C-D-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. He thinks you're faking? I don't think you should-" David raises his voice before I interrupt.

"Shut, shut, shut it. I wasn't, wasn't finished." He nods, "don't focus, focus on that. I need help, help with him noticing me."

"Well, does he even know your name? Let's start there." David rubs his chin as I nod. He better know my name, I told him last night. "Okay, good. How did you meet him? Have you contacted him since then?"

"I bumped into, into him and spilled, spilled, spilled coffee onto him, him. And I saw, saw him yesterday and last night. Last, last night I found a dog, dog and he went into my, my house and gave me advice, advice."

"He went into- okay that's a good start? Yes, no?" David says uneasily.

"Eh, I accidentally said, said he was attractive, attractive." A blush most likely appears on my face as David begins to laugh.

"Okay, okay. What did he say?" David shakes his head to himself.

"'I don't swing, swing that way, way.'" I cringe at the memory, worst by far. I still can't get over it.

"Wait, if he's not gay, then I don't think you have a chance bud." David sighs, and seems like he's going to continue but I immediately cut in.

"Can't we just try, please? I just need to try with him, okay?" I scratch my forearms and look down at them. I haven't felt like this for anybody and I don't know why it's him. It just is, so I'm trying no matter what.

"Okay fine. Do you know where he works? May be then you can chat with him and I'll be your side kick."

I nod, "you want, want to go right, right, right now?"

David shrugs before standing and holding a hand out for me, which I decline to. "Let's go get your dream boy, buddy." I hope he pushes aside the fact that my 'dream boy' is his friend, Harry.

a.n before you guys click off, am i moving the story too fast? i need constructive critisism pls

hope you guys enjoyed

stay fabulous, my friends x.