/kommwoˈvɛːre/

(v.) to stir, to touch, to move to tears,

♡♡♡

When I saw you, I feel in love, and you smiled because you knew.

♡♡♡

In memory of Alan Rickman - you are my hero.

Always.

♡♡♡

She remembered.

She remembered how his touch felt like the spider web delicacy of warm breaths on a rainy morning; remembered how his lips felt like the cotton candy tickle of clouds and sugary tint of caramel.

She remembered Aaron.

She remembered the skies in his eyes and the slopes of his shoulders and the mountains of his back; relished in the curves of his collarbones and the arch of his neck. She recollected the smell of his chest and the smoothness of his hair and the point of his cheekbones and his porcelain skin and his his his –

She remembered how beautiful he was.

She remembered how his warm breaths always tingled the exposed skin of her shoulder and how the hairs on his arms always tickled her back and neck.

She remembered.

And now that she remembered –now that Aaron was back, she was drowning herself in him all over again.

It was never suppose to be this easy –I will lose him the next time I see him– never suppose to be some kind of pathetic apology stunt that could heal Rose's wounds that quickly.

But Aaron was different –he always was.

When she opened the front door only to see his eyes of lapis and cerulean, she knew what her strategy would be –Get out of here Aaron, I never want to see you again– and the memorized scripts that Rose said again and again in front of the mirror was just about to pass her mouth, already at the crevices on her lips –but she just couldn't say it.

His blue eyes held so much regret –so much despair, that no matter how much Rose tried to remind herself on what he did –He left you like you were nothing, he left you left you left you– the sincere guilt in his eyes blew away any thoughts of leaving that Rose stitched into her system for the past week.

She'd like to think that Aaron's eyes were her weakness –but then again, Aaron himself was her kryptonite.

Because he was the boy she loved; a little dark, a little rough around the edges, but beautiful all the same.

"Do you get it now Rose?" He said, swallowing harshly. "I never –I never want you to think that I would leave you like that." He took in a breath. "I would never leave you like that."

She traced the lines of his arms with the tip of her fingers, exhaling out a small breath. "Of course I get it Aaron," She replied. "I mean –I mean like that's fucked up in ways that my mental capacity can't even comprehend."

A small smile tickled his lips. "Did you just curse?"

"That's not the point right now,"

He was smiling now –smiling so brightly as though there was absolutely nothing wrong with the way things were. "Then what's the point right now?"

"The point is that I'm trying to be angry but you're making me smile."

He was smiling with his teeth now. "I missed your smile."

"But really Aaron? Does it have to be now from all times?" Even she couldn't suppress that smile anymore.

"God," He whispered, pulling her closer. "I missed you so much."

She nuzzled her head into the pillows of his collarbones. "I missed you too." She smiled again. "Like a lot."

"I'm sorry," He whispered in her hair. "I really am."

"I know you are," Rose said, lacing their fingers. "And it's okay –you're forgiven."

And when he kissed her that Monday evening, she remembered just how much she loved him.

∞∞∞

She couldn't imagine it.

She couldn't imagine the lonely slumbers and the static silence on the morning breakfast table as opposed to chatter filled air; can't even begin to picture the quiet days and the inked nights.

She couldn't imagine going through what Aaron had to go through.

It was all plans –all some sick game of Yes and No and some insane gambling of things with polished results, but ended with jagged edges and chipped corners.

"Are you okay?"

She didn't know the answer herself.

"Yeah," She answered quietly, letting out a small breath. "Just thinking."

Thinking of all the sleepless nights he had to go through; of all the dinners he had to eat alone, looking at the renaissance ceiling of history and polished gold as his companions –as somewhat of a presence that Aaron could feel.

She was thinking of how hard it must've been –of how she knew she wouldn't have been able to do what he did.

Aaron smiled lightly, his blue eyes shining. "Why do you look so troubled Rose?" He held her closer. "You'll get wrinkles like that," He joked lightly, kissing her forehead.

"How did you do it Aaron?" Rose whispered, her brown eyes stitched with incredulity. "How?"

"Do what?"

"Go through that," Rose replied softly, her bottom lip quivering. "You make it seem so easy."

Aaron smiled sadly. "It wasn't something so bad Rose –you eventually get used to it." He nudged the skin of her jaw with his nose. "Don't scratch it, it doesn't matter."

"Of course it matters Aaron –I mean, it is one of the most important things as of right now," Rose said firmly. "It –it means a lot that you had the guts to tell me something like that."

Aaron smiled that almost smile. "I would tell you anything."

"Anything?"

Now he was smiling. "Anything."

"Then did –" Rose gulped down a small breath. "– did you get lonely?"

Astonishment passed by his azure eyes before his lips bloomed into a some-what smile. "Yes."

She gripped his hand tighter. "I'm sorry."

He shook her off. "Don't be," He told her, smiling again. "I have you now."

"But –but you didn't have anyone before and I can't even begin to imagine–"

"I had friends," Aaron said. "And they are still with me now."

Rose let out a sigh of relief. "Thank God–"

"My friends are the characters folded between the pages of books, and my sanity was the spine holding us together." Aaron whispered to her, that subtle smile on his lips and those blue eyes twinkling and she couldn't couldn't couldn't –

"Before Andrew, Luke, Aiden and Tristan, I had Harry, Ron, Hermione and Neville; and before them, I had Oliver, Mr. Brownlow and Nancy." He continued, his eyes reflecting off the worlds he dived into when things were getting a little too hard for him to weigh on his shoulders. "I had them, and they had me and that –that was all that really mattered." He was smiling now, his right dimple indenting his cheek. "And now, I have you too."

Rose could feel her eyes watering. "Yeah, you do." She snuggled into him deeper, letting out a big exhale at the crook of his neck. "And I'm never leaving."

She could feel him smiling. "Then that's all that counts."

And they sealed it with a kiss as they always did.

∞∞∞

It felt like the night was never ending.

3:07 am and Aaron and Rose were still tangled limbs and warm breaths against each other in his bed; her hair mingling with Aaron's collarbones and his arm draped across her waist and her head nuzzled in his chest.

It was the cozy silence that settled down upon the pair, the only sounds being their constant breathing and Rose's spontaneous sneezes –Why are you sneezing it is not even that cold– and she would flash him that lazy grin –I guess your place is a little dusty– and it would be him with quirked eyebrows and challenging eyes –Do you even want to know how much I spent on cleaning materials?

His room was dark; illuminated by a few worn out candles –Aaron those candles look like they ran out of wax– and the splotches of light were enough to catch the yellow in Aaron's eyes –Those are antique Rose, you wouldn't understand.

Multiple blankets were draped upon the two; mixing in with their secret smiles and quiet giggles; his deep chuckles and her shy laughs.

It was the definition of shy when Rose was touching Aaron all over again, and she could feel how carefully he was touching her –as though he was scared he would touch her wrong.

"How is James?" Rose asked, her eyes flickering to the window when she could hear the pitter-patter of rain.

"He's alright," Aaron replied, giving her a lazy smile –Oh my God God God– "He wants to see you."

Rose smiled big. "Really now?"

Aaron nodded his head. "He asked about you multiple times actually,"

Rose could feel her cheeks burn. "That's really flattering –I can't handle this."

Aaron let out a small laugh. "He never shuts up about you," Aaron said. "And quite frankly, it's making me concerned."

Rose snorted. "Well if he is as cute as you are, then we might have a problem Sergeant."

Aaron grinned so brilliantly that Rose had to blink again. "You think I'm cute?"

"Adorable,"

"Rose,"

And she laughed, feeling his chest vibrate against her arm. He left a kiss to her temple then, letting out a small breath as he smiled. "But you still are adorable."

His lips flattened into a thin line. "I swear if you call me adorable one more time –"

Her soft giggle interrupted his playful sentence, because when Rose noticed how he was staring at her with the universe in his eyes and the secrets of time sprinkled on his lips, she could feel the breath clog her throat.

And the smile that adorned Aaron's mouth was one that completely demolished Rose's insides. And he didn't even need to say anything, because from the gentleness in his eyes and the softness of his cheeks and the quirk of his lips –it was all so crystal clear.

"I love you," He whispered to her, and that in itself, was enough for Rose's heart to beat like a beast against her chest.

"W-what?" She couldn't breathe, couldn't breathe, couldn't breathe.

She was afraid she heard him wrong.

"I love you," He murmured against her cheek, leaving a lingering kiss there.

She was afraid she was imaging things.

She let out a choked breath. "Aaron you don't know what you're saying –"

"I'm not your childhood sweetheart, not even a football jock with a promising future, and I am most definitely not the guy you would typically look at," He said quietly. "I am just a fucked up kid who has absolutely no idea what he is doing," He said, his blue eyes drenching with honesty. "A fucked up kid who is hopelessly in love with you," He said softly, meeting her brown gaze as he sent her a small smile. "And that makes sense to me."

His palm then touched the skin of her cheek, his arctic eyes glimmering with devotion, accompanied by the lop-sided grin tickling his lips, before he closed his eyes and left her a kiss on her forehead. "I love you."

Rose could've actually died if she didn't inhale the biggest breath her lungs could take.

And Aaron wasn't fazed, if anything, he looked almost amused –that smile on his lips widening. He looked so delicate, so ethereal that even Rose's toes were reacting, and she couldn't breathe breathe breathe –

"I –my God I can't breathe –umm I have no –oh my God I think I'm going to go into cardiac arrest,"

He chuckled lightly, the small crinkles by his eyes catching Rose's attention. "I guess we're way past therapy and rehab now right?"

"Now it's only the ER."

He smiled. "ER we go then."

"Aaron," She whispered. "I –"

"You don't need to say it back," He said quietly to her, flashing her a comforting smile. "You don't need to just because I did –I –I just wanted to let you know." He gave their entwined fingers a squeeze. "Remember how I tell you everything now?"

Rose let out a squeak. "I really need to go to the ER." She nuzzled her face into his neck. "You sure?"

"I just said I love you and you're asking me if I'm sure?"

"I did say I needed the ER, blame my deoxygenating brain cells."

"I know love can be as pointless as it is to Nancy, and perhaps even as revolting as it is to Bill Sikes, but for me," Aaron whispered, smiling lightly. "I don't think it would be half as bad with you."

Rose could feel the veins and arteries in her become one.

She

"I love you," He repeated.

couldn't

"With all my heart."

breathe.

"I –I just hope you never regret me Rose," His voice became hushed, his fingertips flinching against her collarbones. "Because I can tell you now –I will never regret you."

She felt the urge to touch him –to reassure him that stuff like that never even crossed her mind. Her hands came against his chest, eventually wrapping around his shoulders as she pulled him into a tight embrace. She didn't even realize she was crying until she saw her tears create a patch of moisture on his shoulder.

"Aaron," She whispered. "Thank you,"

He rubbed away the tears cascading down her cheeks, smiling lightly. "For what?"

"For loving me," She was crying continuously now, sobs rattling her throat to escape but she was smiling.

"Sweetheart," He murmured. "I should be thanking you for letting me love you." He pulled her closer towards him, letting out a small breath against her hair.

"I can't stop crying,"

"I can see that."

"I'm just so happy."

"I can tell,"

She sniffled, smiling. "Narcissist much?"

"You know it."

∞∞∞

Rose thought it was inevitable really.

That she would memorise the way his eyelashes curled against the outer slits of his eyes; how she would notice the way his collarbones curved upwards when he was uncomfortable, and how when she was cuddled against him, she swears her fingertips can trace each and every dip and dent of his back.

It was inevitable that she fell in love with him.

But even so –it always seemed like love was never enough.

She never knew that the 4 letter word could make her chest brim with awe to the very surface; that the single syllable word can make her sanity wash down the drain and clog her pipe of breathing.

She never knew love could feel so beautiful.

That all the myths and fairytales were absolutely true about the fluttering hearts and heated cheeks; that all the songs and movies were right about the star gazed eyes and smiley lips. That there was nothing warmer than his body against hers as she listened to the constant Thump – thump of his heart.

She never knew love could be so strong that it tore down walls and softened even the most toxic of hearts.

She never knew that she could ever love someone as much as she loved Aaron.

Looking over to see his blue eyes still veiled shut, she carefully crawled out of bed –taking extra care to not wake him up.

And when she finally freed herself from his grip, the cold floor tickled her feet as she let out a small yawn and stretched; double checking that Aaron still didn't wake up.

Her movements halted when she heard Aaron stir, biting her lip in anticipation as her movements became quiet and soft; almost tiptoeing on his wooden floor when she heard him let out a sigh –Please don't wake up don't wake up don't wake up–

And then he opened his eyes.

She watched as his eyes darted to the other side of the bed, noticing how he sucked in a breath when he realized it was empty and then –

His eyes looked so alarmed; wide with panic as they settled on her, all previous sleepiness in them gone as she saw his chest frantically moving up and down.

"Are you leaving?" His voice –his voice held this wild hysteria, this urgency as he let the question out.

It was so soft, but so frightening at the same time.

"Are you?" He whispered again, the blue of his eyes shimmering against the darkness of dawn, his Adam's apple bobbling up and down.

"No," She told him, smiling. "I was just going to make some breakfast silly."

His hands were trembling.

He exhaled out a long breath, shaking his head before he told her. "Come here,"

She quirked an eyebrow, shaking her head. "But breakfast–"

"Breakfast can wait," He then pulled her back in against his chest, a smile of his own blooming on his lips.

Rose laughed. "Really Aaron? Very mature of you,"

"I know," He then let out a small yawn. "And the audacity you have for making me get up this early."

She shrugged. "I'm hungry."

He let out a quiet laugh, his soft lips pressing a gentle kiss to her temple. "It's five in the morning Rose, sleep a little more."

"Today is a school day dweeb."

He peeked at her through one eye. "I noticed." He grinned. "Your point?"

"You always make me miss my classes –like Jesus Christ Aaron this is not a drill."

His smile widened. "You know you love it."

She narrowed his eyes at him. "You wish–"

"Now close those eyes of yours and get some sleep."

"But I'm hungry–"

He let out a chuckle before he sat up, rubbing his eyes. "Then let's go see what we can make okay?"

"Alright, but I am not touching your forsaken toaster,"

Aaron smiled lightly. "But I kind of miss your burnt toast."

She never knew that she always loved Aaron more than love itself.

∞∞∞

"Jason is Aiden's younger brother," Andrew said. "The moronic idiot who forgot he was right handed and started writing with his left."

"You know I can hear you when you talk shit about my bloodline," Aiden said. "And so let me add to the conversation –he once mistaken shaving cream for shampoo and it was not a happy day for my Mom."

Tristan rolled his eyes. "Can you tell they're related?"

Rose –on the other hand– was ecstatically beaming. "You have a little brother? That sounds adorable." And she squealed –like literally squealed.

"For fuck's sake," Aaron muttered, gulping down some water. "Here we go,"

"Please," Luke cringed. "Jason is anything but adorable. That little shit can go a whole week without changing out of his jeans and terrible purple shirt." He shuddered. "I've had the pleasure of entering his cave."

Tristan quirked an eyebrow. "And by cave you mean room?"

"Don't even try to say it –it stopped being a room when he started collecting rocks as a hobby."

Aiden shrugged. "In my offense it's more of an outdoor garden than a cave –but whatever suits your preference."

"A garden with about 3 trillion corpses of millions of species of insects and scattering of rotten pizza and leftover spaghetti," Luke added. "Very fitting."

Lana grimaced. "Christ,"

Andrew chuckled. "You didn't even see his closet yet."

Rose pursed her lips. "I want to cry."

"You will when you open his closet and the stench of his body odor hits your face."

Aiden nodded his head. "We can use that shit in the military as stink bombs."

"Oh for fuck's sake."

∞∞∞

Aaron always made Rose feel beautiful.

Any chance he got or any opportunity he saw, he always took it. Even if it was just a simple You look nice or a I like that shirt on you, Aaron always found any excuse he could to drizzle across Rose a shower of compliments.