September 26,2021

"One can still reach the foundation of success, while carrying the burden of fear and possible failure. But it won't be possible to climb with that load."

It was already 2 AM, with my eyes still resisting sleep. It has already been two days since my body got any proper rest, and tiredness was spreading within my veins like fire. I found myself doing house chores, reading, writing, and drawing all at once- anything that allows a human to fall asleep. The results were expected. Nothing worked. I did manage to sleep for three hours- and even during that, I was conscious of the surroundings.

At 7:00 AM, I prepared breakfast for Mia and dropped her at school. It was around the same time Ellena went to her job at the police station, where she worked restlessly as a criminal forensic. At about the age of 23, Ellena craved independence, which drove her to move out of her parent's house. However, the unshakable attachment she had with Mr Alfred and Mrs Evelyn, meant that she can not go to another neighbourhood, and settled in a different house beside them. I was still her neighbour, so nothing changed except for her self-satisfaction.

After returning home, I spent the day taking care of one-month-old Layla, who proved to be a quiet baby. It wasn't long before Mia disrupted the calm atmosphere, narrating how her day proceeded as she ate lunch. And while I've spent most of my life studying, I never felt bored at any instant. After a few hours, it was time for the kingdom's class.

I invited Ellena over to take care of the girls, and explained the 'situation', consisting mainly of lies trying to hide its actuality.

"Aryn, I'll be travelling for a week or two to Mark. His father is severely sick and he needs me to stay beside him. It was so hard to take a vacation from work, but I couldn't stay and leave him there."

Mark was Ellena's husband. An ambitious man, who ran after a job opportunity abroad, seeking a higher societal position. He later discovered that it wasn't only a job opportunity in the Uk, but an aid of destiny for his father, who has been diagnosed with Cardiomyopathy. And while there's no exact treatment, Mark believed that he owed his father hope in the form of visiting the best doctors and exerting himself financially.

"Ellena, I suggest that you just leave everything behind and spend as much time as possible with your loved ones."

"Is everything alright? It's nothing new really, and I've been used to it."

"I'm just saying it's not worth it. Anyways, I am really late and I need to go now. Goodbye, and I'm so sorry again for involving you in this."

"No, not at all. You know how much I love kids!"

A few hours later, I arrived at the kingdom along with Cooper. On my way to the class, an alluring melody suddenly began playing, involuntarily dragging me towards it. My feet unconsciously walked towards the source of the tranquil sound, as if the instrument had invisible strings pulling them. However, the path reached a dead-end soon, and my eyes still couldn't distinguish the mysterious violinist.

The music the violin radiated was soft, yet poignant. Everyone stood upright in straight lines like an army. No one uttered a word, as if afraid that their voice would block the path of the symphony. Even the wind was silent, bowing in respect. The music was like that calm breeze, harsh in spots and gentle in others. Or like the rain, drowning some plants and giving life to others.

"Excuse me, but do you know who is playing such music?" I asked one of the guards.

"That side is Mrs Giana's dorm. And this music plays once a year silently, and at exactly this time. It's such a meaningful melody, holding a thousand stories behind it. Only a person as old and experienced as Mrs Giana could narrate that many stories in a single piece of music," she replied.

Although I was probably running late for the class, my soul refused to leave before the finish of the melody. The moment the bow left its violin, no one clapped but instead, tears of admiration fell down their cheeks as they bowed. While the wind may have ceased transmitting the music, it planted faith to return again someday.

I walked towards my seat and grabbed the book. Louis came in almost no time and began his usual explanations. His voice was bold, like that of a King giving a speech. He didn't refer to the book, as if each sentence subconsciously flew in his arteries rather than his mind. However, his tone was too casual for someone aware of the destined fate in five years.

"And now Aryn, you told me that you read the first chapter of the book in prison. But to what extent did you read?"

"Nothing much really. Just the individuals responsible for the war and the reason why love may serve as a threat," I replied.

"Do you know why the war was caused in the first place?"

"No. I couldn't reach that part."

"Alright let's begin shall we?"

I nodded, unanticipated.

"So, 100s of years ago, the legal heir after King Zolas Lirgat was his eldest sister, Princess Luna Ligrat, given the fact he had no children. Soon, the King retired and Princess Luna became the Queen. However, she exploited the Kingdom's minerals and metals for the gain of money and power. The objective of that generation of protectors was forgotten- and thus the revolution against her began,

"Eventually after 3 years of revolution, Queen Luna got deposed, and an electoral college was forced to appoint a new heir, and break the hereditary monarch of the Ligrat dynasty. It was decided that the next ruler would be a pure-blooded protector at priority or a half-blooded protector. A protector's child would purely originate in the Kingdom, and thus a more rightful owner. On the contrary, a normal protector would have different origins," he continued, turning on the board to display images of the children.

"Unfortunately, in a single week, all heirs were killed brutally. The investigations revealed that Queen Luna and her husband were behind the horrible crimes, aiming to gain the throne back.

After the former King, Zolas, knew what his sister did, the war began between them. This resulted in the splitting of the Kingdom into Rizolir and Serevth. After the King died, his next elder sister, Queen Lilian took over and was fortunately as fair as her brother."

I never loved history classes. Details of who Death visited stung the heart, but a person forgets what he reads after an hour or so. Some people confuse the dates of world one war and two- and that's the truth. That brutal war happened on this land, and the spot I sat on maybe one a child collapsed at. And for what? Greed. It was unfair. If injustice could speak, it'd object despite being the cause.

But those children, this kingdom, and even the unsaid words of injustice lay in the future. The inevitable fate, that somehow every person was ignoring. They're talking, walking with the same emotion of a newborn child- that is none. The protectors, guards, and authorities acted no different than those outside of Rizolar.

"But what about the future? Earth is dying, and I came to this class here only hoping that you'd lead me on some path of a solution," I asked

"I gave you the chapters and the research. I will just strengthen your foundations and you'll have to learn the rest on your own, and perhaps search for a solution. As for my opinion," he answered.

For a few, long seconds he paused with doubt in his eye. That confidence he had suddenly faded, and this time his words weren't flowing in his arteries. They were built for long years, and despite their sturdiness, Louis still had some reluctance pronouncing them.

"Well, if you look around you, mankind's activities destroyed almost everything from oceans to forests to the air we breathe. Everything has a limit to patience, and Earth reached hers. I see that it called for that supernova, and asked it to take its life. Perhaps, Earth is committing suicide."

The lake was still, there was no wind, no falling leaves, and no one except some guards, and there was silence. My brain couldn't interpret his words, and accordingly, let go of the imprisoned words. His voice remained as loud as a King's, but Kings don't give up their nations, which was something Louis did a long time ago.

"Anyway, we're done for today. You'll have a test, next week, about the first 20 chapters."

I stood up. Suddenly, I felt that energy was slowly leaving my soul. Breathing became impossible. My vision blackened- and everything rotated in an endless motion. The pain escalated to my limbs, paralyzing them. Occasionally, a few coloured, blurred visions appeared. And in that, Louis looked terrified. It was that look doctors gave when complications occurred. Terror. His lips were moving, but my ears couldn't detect any sound.

My body felt so heavy that my feet could no longer support it. Still gasping for breath, my foggy vision could see the world rising and an agitated motion. The last thing I felt was the damp grass against my cold figure—all in a few seconds.

After an unknown time, I gradually opened my eyes. Four white walls surrounded me. An IV needle was attached to my pale hand, my vitals were all normal, and everything was normal. 'Was it?' I asked myself. A few seconds ago, it seemed like air left the universe, and now it was claiming to have never done so.

I heard a polite knock on the door. Louis entered, with evident worry on his face.

"Can I speak to you for a few minutes? If you feel too tired, I can delay it," he said.

I looked at him, not forgetting his earlier words, and nodded.

"Listen to me. You've been through exceptional circumstances, so you can't expect to give a normal reaction. And this is what I wanted to tell you. The doctors said nothing is wrong with you physically, it's purely psychological, " he said as he handed me a glass of water.

"We have very good psychologists here, who will be more than welcome to help you through your struggles. That doesn't mean you're crazy. It doesn't mean you're weak either. It means you're strong enough to stand up again."

There was a long pause, and my only response was to look into his eyes and try to search for an answer.

"Anyway, I'll leave you to think about it. Here's the psychologist's number. In case you wanna call her, there are nearby phones for internal communications."

He placed the card on the table beside me and left, leaving no pressure to reply. Mia and Layla, we're waiting for my return. Maybe I saw in them the kids I'll never have, or perhaps it was my sympathy with Mia, but a strong bond linked me to those girls. Then, there is entire humanity to save, whom everybody gave up on.

A protector seeing a psychologist - I don't think I've read it anywhere. I was afraid of being judged and that, in turn, affecting my authority over how people accept my opinions.

It wasn't long before I left the hospital and went to rest in my dorm. Pamela- the guard in front of my dorm- handed me a letter before returning motionless again. The letter invited me to a meeting 'Withdrawal and Unity', which is in two weeks. I left the invitation on the table, not bothering to understand it.

Cooper lay beside me in bed. Again, my body managed to get an hour or two of rest before diving into 'Rules of Death' again. It was hard to focus, and the words were as condensed as if the Sun fit into Earth. Not wanting to go home, I went for a walk considering that the girls were probably in good hands with Ellena.

My eyes immediately fell on Devlin, who was standing like a statue in front of the central pond. She stood at the only edge having dead flowers, which permitted a narrow view of the Eastern kingdom. A few meters ahead stood the Limefall fence, with thin wires jolting out of its rusty-pointed bars. There were many guards- except they had a moon tattoo on their necks, unlike the ones at the entrance.

There was sophistication engraved in the mystery surrounding every corner, place and person. Only a meticulous person would carve his way to the bottom of success. And if he were to rise, he'll need to use sticks of skill and will to climb. It was only now that Aunt Giana's words played in my mind. "You have to put your soul into it," or so she said.

I went to one of the guards and inquired about those phones Louis told me about. My palm held the white card from my pocket, and my fingers automatically typed the numbers. I realized that the fear of judgment didn't collide with my sticks of will. I won't be able to climb with the burden of my past, which will become a heavy load to hold, and the greatest barrier to return me to the initial point.

"Good Morning, who's with me?"

"Am I speaking to doctor Sophia?"

"I'm her secretary. Do you wish to make an appointment?"

"I'm Aryn Anderson, a protector in the kingdom. I'd like to book an appointment with Doctor Melinda as soon as possible if you don't mind," I answered.

"Alright. Give me a second to check Doctor Melinda's schedule."

"Unfortunately, these upcoming weeks are very crowded. The nearest date is in three weeks on October 20, at 12 PM. Does this suit you?"

"Yes, it does. Thank you very much."