The moment my mom awakes I run outside to tell the nurses she's awake and only a few seconds pass before two nurses and a doctor come in to check on her and ask her a few questions, mostly about how she feels.

After the explanations of what to do for her and the necessary medicine to help with mostly the pain and healing, they leave us alone once again.

I ask Mrs. Pemberton, who was here with me to take Chris outside while I talk to my mom.

I take a deep breath, as to be calm. I don't even know what to say, let alone where to start. There are so many things I want her to know, now that she's sober. How much she hurt me, how much I needed her after my dad died, how her absence affected Chris.

But maybe right now isn't the time to pour out all my feelings out there. I have to be responsible and do what's right.

After a few minutes of silence of her just looking at me, like she's seeing me for the first time, like I'm a whole different person. While I still deliber in what to say.

She opens her mouth to speak. What? I have no idea, but I'm not gonna let her talk yet. I have been listening for a year, now it's her turn to listen.

"What were you thinking?! Not only did you put your life in danger, with the possibility of leaving your children orphans, but you put other people's lives in anger! I mean, what were you thinking?! How could you be so irresponsible? Did you even think about Chris? I'm not even gonna talk about me, but I would expect you to consider that. So tell me! What the Hell were you thinking?! I mean, obviously you weren't, you were probably too damn drunk to even realise what you were doing!"

I let out a breath after that. It's not everything I want to say, not even close, but it'll have to do for now.

"I'm sorry, honey. I'm so so sorry," she says, with tears coming down from my eyes. "You're right, I didn't think. I have been a terrible mother these past months and I am so sorry. I didn't know what to do so I resorted to alcohol, and I know that's not an excuse, but I want to get better, then I'll ask for your forgiveness."

Great, now I'm crying, too. For the first time, since my fathers passing, she looks like the mother she once was. The mother I lost. And I want her back so bad, that I consider forgiving her just then. I crave the comfort of my mother.

But I can't just forgive her. I need to make sure she gets better first and the help she needs, only then will I consider forgving her, if she proves herself to be worthy.

"Chris wants to talk to you, I'll bring him in. I need some air."

With that, I exit the room, ignoring her calls of my name. I can't talk to her right now, I just need to breathe.

I come face to face with everyone else that was waiting in the waiting room. Everyone looks at me differently, some with sadness, some with sympathy, but the one that speaks to me the most, is the amount of worry Leo is in, he looks at me as if he just wants to hug me and scare away all my problems.

"Chris, come on," I call out to my little brother. "Mom wants to see you."

I go with him inside, but leave him in the care of my mother. When I go outside, I ask Mrs. Pemberton if she can look after Chris for a while.

I make my way outside, well aware that Leo is following after me.

When I get outside, I go to a bench on the little graden next to the entrance and sit down. Leo sits down next to me.

He puts an arm around me and I lay my head on his shoulders, putting my arms around his torso. We get a few dirty looks from some of the people going in and out of the doors, but I just ignore them. Leo seems to do so, too, because he just kisses my forehead.

"How are you holding up?" He asks softly.

"I don't know," I answer, letting a few tears drop. "She appologised."

"What are you gonna do?"

I just shake my head in response. He seems to get the message as he pulls me closer to his side and we just sit there until I manage to calm down.

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When I go back to the waiting room, I thank everyone for coming, but I felt bad for them just waiting here without doing nothing, so I asked them to go home. Only Leo stayed back and Chris, too seeing as he's going home with me. Macy and John got here sometime while I was outside, but I told them to go home, too. They were hard to convince, but they enventually went away, after a lot of convincing and reasoning.

I go back to my mom's room to get Chris, seeing as visiting hours are ending, but this time Leo comes with me.

Inside, Chris and mom are both laying on her bed, her arms around him while he sleeps away without a care in the world, while mom runs her hands through his hair.

"I'll get Chris, we'll wait in the car," he goes to the bed and picks him up, my mom looks at him weirdly but doesn't say anything.

He stops in front of me before exiting and I check to see if Chris is still asleep. When I see that he is, I rest my hand on Leo's cheek and whisper a "thank you". He shoots me a wink and goes outside with Chris.

Once the door is closed, I turned to my mom.

"Who was that?" She asks. She's seen him before, she was probably just too intoxicated to remember.

"Leo," I answer vaguely.

"He's very handsome. Is he your friend?"

"No, he's my boyfriend."

"Oh...does he make you happy?" She asks.

"He does, yes, very much," I answer, honestly. "He's been there for me these last few months, every single time I needed him and I love him very much."

"Then I'm glad he was there for you when I wasn't," she says with once again tears in her eyes. I can see in her eyes yhat she feels guilty beyond belief, but I can't find it in myself to forgive her just yet. I don't know if that makes me a bad person or not, but I just can't, at least not yet.

"Yeah, but that's not what I'm here for. I wanted to know what you want to do once you get out. You said you wanted to get better and I'm all in for that, so, I guess what I'm trying to ask is, would you like me to sign you into a rehab facility?"

"Oh, Matt, don't worry about that, I already spoke to the doctor. They want to keep me in here for one more night, but they'll release me tomorrow and the hospital already talked to me about it and I'm already signed in one, it's in the next town over. Will you be ok on your own for the time being?"

"We've been doing just fine for the past months, we'll manage," I can't help it, I let a bit of the bitterness slip into my tone. I regret it for a bit when I see the look on her face. I mean, she's my mother, but then I remember all the awful things she's told me.

"You're right. There's money in the safe in the attic, the code is still the same, it should be enough," she says.

"Ok, well I'll see you tomorrow."

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My mom comes home the next day to get some clothes, anything other than that will be provided by the facilities.

Leo stayed with me through the night, he's been my rock now, more than ever and I love him for that. I told him to go home after my mom got home, I would have to drive her to rehab, I figured Chris would want to say goodbye to our mom.

We are currently standind outside, my mom is at the entrance signing the needed papers while I'm sitting with Chris, waiting for her to finish signing in.

"Well, that was everything," she says once she comes back to join us. "I guess I'll be going, then. If everything goes according to plan, I'll stay in for two months, see how frequently I suffer from withdrawl, how many times I'll want to relapse and according to that they'll decide when to let me go."

I nod, following her explanations about the procedure.

"I don't know when you'll be able to visit me," she continues. "I'll suffer the normal symptoms of withdrawl, one of them is mood swings, maybe irritability, I don't want to snap at any of you, not anymore, but I'll call. Will you visit me?"

"Of course," I answer. I'm willing to forgive her, she knows that. But it'll take time and it'll take effort, but obviously I'l eventually forgive her.

"Ok, then, I guess I'll see you when I see you. You have my credit card, too. If you need anything else, just ask."

I nod once again, not really knowing what else to say and she leans down to hug Chris goodbye and then me. He doesn't fully understand what is going on, he mostly just knows that he won't see mom for a while and that makes him cry.

She had to go in eventually and Chris left with a promise from me that he could have pizza and ice cream for dinner, so I texted Leo to meet us at a local pizza restaurant close to our school.

"Hey," Leo greets with fist bump with Chris and a peck on the lips for me. "How are you holding up?"

"I don't really know how I feel, to be honest, still processing," I answer honestly.

"That's fair, come on, let's go sit down," he holds my hand and guides Chris and I to a little booth in the corner, where we end up spending the rest of the night.

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