《Everyone's a Catgirl!》Chapter 150: The Taming of the Shrew
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I saw a crowd gathering outside when we were coming up on Rājadhānī. Catgirls in colorful silks and sashes screamed at the top of their lungs. Their language was also just as colorful to match. Even from where I was, I could hear them.
“Fuckin’ pig!”
“My baby can’t eat because of you!”
“Down with the men! Down with the men!”
That last one had me feeling a bit apprehensive.
“Are you sure we’re going to be safe here?” I called. We weren’t riding far apart, but the wind had picked up just enough that we couldn’t hear each other very well.
“We’ll be fine! Their aggressions aside, no catgirl would dare harm a man,” Zahra shot back from my left.
“If you’re sure!”
Minutes passed, and soon we were at the front gate, along with everyone else. We hopped off the gigashanks, leaving them to Agni, and muscled through the crowd.
“Excuse me!” I raised my hand behind two other catgirls to get a guard's attention. “Can we get into the city by any chance? It’s important!”
The guard I spoke to had her hands full trying to get a pregnant catgirl off her. “Can’t you see I’m busy? Or are all men like Magni?”
“It concerns Magni! We must see him!” Tristan yelled beside me. A bark of laughter escaped the struggling guard’s mouth, and the other guard joined in. “Please!”
“Magni has made it abundantly clear that no one is allowed inside!” argued the guard. “Now that’s enough, get off of me!” Shaking her arm, she shoved a catgirl to the ground and retrieved a spear resting against the portcullis. “Or I’ll gut you all like lizards!”
Her warning put a few catgirls on the backfoot, but another, taller catgirl wearing an eyepatch over her left eye approached with seemingly no fear. Across her face was one of the most badass scars I’d ever seen. It traveled from halfway up her forehead, all the way down to her chin, following the contours of her face. She had muscles that would’ve put most men to shame, and they glistened in the early afternoon sun like a bodybuilder’s oiled biceps.
Holy mother of God, what is that?
“What do you think you’re doing, threatening your own kind? You have no shame,” said the burly woman. “These women have a right to be here.”
The guard hesitated. “I understand how you feel, but Magni has made it clear that no one is allowed into the city at this time.” She eyed a catgirl who was standing behind me, crying. “That includes anyone who lives here.”
“Magni is unfit to lead,” the burly catgirl said without restraint. “You know that.”
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The guard’s spear point met with the strong catgirl’s chest. “Don’t make me do something I’m going to regret.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it. Pray to Saoirse that she leaves a spot in heaven for you.”
“Who is that?” I heard Cannoli say from behind me.
I shook my head, not looking back. “I dunno. She’s something fierce, though.” Against my better judgment, I craned my arm over and rested my hand on her shoulder. This was harder than I’d expected, as she was over a head taller than me—a first for a catgirl. “Excuse me. What’s going on right now?”
The catgirl blinked, then pushed the guard’s spear away from her chest. A thin line of blood traveled the grooves of her skin as she turned around to face me. “Another man?” Her attention veered to Tristan. “And another… man? You are a man, right?”
Tristan leaned his forehead in his hand, and I stifled a laugh. “Yeah, I’m Matt. His name is Tristan. We’re trying to get an audience with Magni.”
“Good luck with that. In case you haven’t figured it out, Magni isn’t letting anyone into the city right now.” She motioned behind her at the portcullis. “There’s no getting in. Not for the foreseeable future.”
“Why do you think that happened?” Tristan asked, lifting his head.
The catgirl shrugged. “Don’t know. But I have a job to turn in at the Guild. Lot of good I can do out here. Pretty sure they don’t accept carrier lizards.” She smiled, jerking her thumb backward at the group of gigashanks. Tristan and I nodded like it was perfectly normal to hear. “It was a joke.”
“Oh, right. Yeah, haha,” I said nervously. “Of course.”
She frowned but gingerly offered her hand. “Jaya the Tempest. Nice to meet you.”
The Tempest? Where have I heard that before?
“Likewise,” I said, grasping her hand. And what a hand it was. As we shook, I was sure some of the bones in my hand would break. When she let go, I shook away the tingling feeling behind my back, hoping I wouldn’t offend her. “Well, there’s got to be a way to get in.”
“There’s always a way to get in.” Jaya crossed her arms. “Just depends on how many rules you’re willing to break.”
I wanted to sound as little like an asshole as possible, but I had to ask. “But we’re men. Wouldn’t this interfere with men's roles in Nyarlea?”
Jaya frowned, and a pause followed. Then she chuckled. “Well-spoken. Where did you learn so much? I’ve never heard of you.”
“That was a fluke,” Ravyn chimed in somewhere from behind me. “He’s not usually like this.”
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I rolled my eyes. “Maybe Tristan’s rubbing off on me.”
Tristan rubbed the back of his neck, averting his gaze. “I echo Matt’s thoughts, though. I understand that this is Magni’s island and that his word is law. However, Matt and I seek an audience with him to begin reparation efforts to the other islands.” Tristan reached for one of her hands and pulled it out of the fold. “Please. If you can think of anything, it would help us so much.”
Jaya flushed, and a surprisingly feminine smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. “I-I’ve heard your plea, young man.” She swallowed visibly and shook her hand away from Tristan’s grasp. “But it’s not me who needs the convincing.”
Keke, Ravyn, and Ceres came to stand with Cannoli and me, each voicing their opinion in quick remarks.
“Why did he do this? Isn’t Rājadhānī supposed to be the capital of your island?” Keke asked.
“It is,” said Jaya. “But Magni is convinced there’s going to be an assassination attempt on his life soon.”
Ravyn rolled her eyes. “Fuckin’ paranoid royalty.”
“Squawwwwk, fucking dumbass, squawwwk!”
Jaya covered her ears at the sound of Ball Gag. The heads of a few other catgirls turned around to look at us briefly. “Your familiar needs better training.”
“You can tell he’s a familiar?” asked Ravyn.
Jaya nodded. “I’m a [Hunter]. [Hunter]s can detect the difference between all life.” She squinted at the blue parrot perched on Ravyn’s shoulder. “There’s a distinct aura of magic swirling around his body.”
“Oh, I can do that too!” Lara said with her hand held high.
Jaya smiled. “Are you a [Hunter] too?”
Lara shook her head. “Nope, I’m a [Conjurer]!”
At the risk of this conversation plummeting down another of Lara’s numerous rabbit holes, I spoke. “Keeping us on track, does Magni have any reason to suspect an assassination?” Not that I can blame anyone for trying to take him down.
“Of course not.” Jaya laughed. “He wouldn’t tell a soul anything. He hasn’t been seen outside of his, erm, castle in a month.”
“He has a castle?”
“No. The fool calls it a castle. It’s two estate rooms on top of one another. I’ve been in there a few times. It’s beautiful, but I’d seen better on San Island.”
“That sounds right about up his alley,” Agni said with a sigh. “Well, one way or another, I gotta get in there. I got gigashanks needin’ a feedin’.”
“Let me speak with the guard,” said Zahra. Before we could contest her, she shouldered her way past Tristan and me and passed by Jaya.
“I want to see how this goes,” said Jaya.
Just as we reached the guard, I realized how intimidating we might appear. We had eleven people if you included Jaya, all bearing down on this poor girl. Twelve if you wanted to count Ball, I guess.
“I demand to know why you won’t allow entry,” Zahra said. Her tone came off accusatory and provoking. I wondered if she was aware of that.
“Look, I just enforce the rules. It doesn’t mean I agree with them,” the guard sighed.
“I get it. You got a busy and thankless job,” I said. “But we need to get inside. It’s for the sake of everyone. We have to speak with Magni. A lot has happened, and we can’t see any way to move forward without him. Cailu… Cailu—” Fuck, what was that twat’s last name? Ah, what does it matter? “Cailu would be here, too, if he could.”
Mentioning Cailu seemed to catch the guard’s attention. “Really, I understand. But the moment I open this gate up, there will be a stampede. Even if I let you in, I can’t do it without letting everyone else in too.”
“Kathy, just forget it,” said the other guard. She threw her spear to the ground and began to walk away. “This isn’t worth the trouble anymore. I quit.”
“Seraphina, wait!” Kathy shrieked with her hand held out. Her shoulders slumped when Seraphina ignored her, disappearing into the crowd and following the stretch of wall protecting the city.
With one of the most exasperated sighs I’d ever witnessed, Kathy turned back to us and pulled on the winch hiding in one of the supporting portcullis towers. The crowd's banter died, and the gate began to open. “Have at it. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Magni’s not going to let you in without a fight.”
Catgirl after catgirl ran past us like they’d been starving for days. I pulled Cannoli’s arm so she stood behind me while the stampede of catgirls carried past us.
“T-thanks, Matt,” Cannoli squeaked.
“Don’t mention it.” I breathed a sigh. “I’ll be honest. I’m not looking forward to this.”
“Don’t worry, Matt. We’re behind you,” said Keke.
“Magni will see reason once we have discussed the more pertinent issues at present,” reasoned Ceres.
“Good. Let’s get the fuck in, then,” said Ravyn.
Alright then. No matter what happens, I’ve got allies at my side. Let’s do this.

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