“So, what’s on the menu for today’s breakfast?”

“Today’s specialty is barely boiled eggs from the roof that at least look like they aren’t cracked.”

“Ah, my favorite!”

Well, as it turns out, with my pocket money that I had stashed away for a rainy day I could only just barely afford an umbrella (so to speak). In other words, we could afford a week’s worth of rent for the inn we were lodging in, but that was about it. We had to drink water from the town square’s river, and as you can tell, the food isn’t anything too hearty.

Even still, we don’t know the language, so I doubt we’d get that far even if we had the money to hop on a transport wagon. To be honest, I was surprisingly quick to get accustomed to this new, more conservative way of life, but Marina wasn’t having any of it. Looking at her, she’s slimmed down an amazing amount in just a week, and her previous teasing nature was all but exchanged for one of a primal beast looking for survival and survival only.

“Say, Lune, why don’t we just stop by the plaza real quick? Y’know, take our minds off of the hunger?”

“No way!” I immediately objected, “You’re just planning on stealing the baker’s bread. I’m tolerant on a lot of things, but I will not allow us resorting to petty crime in order to survive.”

“…Weren’t you a gang leader?”

“Well yeah, but we were a… a good gang, I guess! We certainly had our gang disputes, b-but it was most always the enemy gang that were picking a fight with us! We never stole and treated the people who lived in our territory with great care!”

“Alright, alright, don’t get your panties in a twist. Oh, but wait, so does that mean you guys killed?”

Well, of course we did. As any gang should, for that matter. But it was either done in self-defense or if we had a REALLY important reason to do so. You have to be resolute as fuck if you wanna take someone’s life away from them, y’know? Ah, but if I told her that, she might start to feel threatened by me, so I’ll just give a white lie.

“Didn’t I just say we were a good gang? While I certainly can’t speak for the gang’s past records, but as far as I can tell, ever since we took over the BBG and TBL, there hasn’t been a single reported murder.”

“Seriously? Lame~!”

This girl…! You think killing someone is a joke or something?! A-Ah, calm down, Lune, the hunger’s getting to you…

“So what does MariLune have to say to us today? D’you think it finally unscrambled some instructions?”

“No clue, MariLu-err, that scrap of paper has been unscrambling for a week straight now. It’s probably still not finishe-”

I cut my sentence off at the end after inspecting the scrap of paper and witnessing a miracle unfold before my very eyes. It’s… unscrambling! It’s unscrambling right in front of us. Quickly, I need to check what it says, I don’t want it to suddenly change before we could extract any information from it!

“Climbing great heights and meeting a many great people, the protagonist finds himself gaining and losing interchangeably and hastily. With his companion, the protagonist must first go South and visit the Grys Royal Family in order to…”

…?

“Where’s the rest of the message?” Marina asked.

“I imagine on the rest of the page. Since we only have a small scrap of paper, it got cut off right around at that part of the sentence. That’s really damn unlucky.”

“Well, I guess you could see it like that, but remember that our names are Mr. and Mrs. Optimist! In a way, you could say that we’re lucky to even have MariLune with us, not to mention that it actually worked.”

Didn’t I tell you not to call me that?! If Cecily somehow heard this, the entire situation would devolve into a huge misunderstanding!

“O-Oh right,” I got an idea, “Since we’re faking our deaths to escape the ITA scot-free, how about we go the whole nine yards and change the way we’re addressed as well?”

“You mean a name change?”

“Exactly! It’d make it easier to move around, instead of being stuck in this little town in Boreal. Plus, we could continue our normal lives when we get back home without issues as an added bonus! It’s a two birds with one stone type of thing.”

Marina suddenly got extremely excited at my suggestion. It was actually kinda worrying how much she wanted her name to be changed. Does she dislike it that much? I think Marina’s a pretty fitting name for her, though… (I mean this in a purely wholesome and platonic way, Cecily! Please don’t strike me down with thunder!)

“That’s an awesome idea!” She jumped at me with a certain intensity, “Then I’ll be Mariabelle! Mariabelle Pandora!”

Mariabelle? Isn’t that name way too… princess-like? I can’t quite put my finger on it, but I just feel like it’s way too prim and proper for a rowdy seductress like her.

“And you’ll be Elle Gordon!” She then pointed to me.

…Eh?

“E-Elle… what? Come on, surely you’re not being serious here!”

“Why? It suits you pretty well. Despite being a man, you never accept my advances, hence the Elle. And Gordon because you always take the bigger half of our food supplies!”

Those are really shallow reasons!

I guess naming wasn’t one of her strong suits. I feel bad for her future kids (if she ever has any). Well, I guess I’ll have to be the man in charge of my own name. Let’s see, this is the name I’ll be using until I get back home. Who knows when that day’s gonna come, though, so I really don’t wanna get stuck with a name I personally dislike. Hmm, something cool, mysterious, but also gives off the vibe of an experienced traveler. Something that's as great and mighty as the high Sun above… Oh wait, I got it!

“Sol!” I proudly declared, “Like Abyssus Solis, the very center of the map!”

“Eh? What kind of name is that?”

“It’s cool and mysterious! It’s a name that stands atop anyone and everyone triumphantly!”

Marina’s expression suddenly went from one of disinterest to one of great amusement. She got close to me, as if she wanted to lean in for a kiss but stopped midway.

“Well, I just can’t get ‘Lune’ out of my mind, but I’ll amuse you while we’re around other people. From now on, you’re Sol Pandora… darling.”

“E-Eh?! Who said we were married?!”

“Married?” She gave a confused reaction, “I never said we’re married. Who says we can’t be siblings? Unless of course, you want to…”

“NEVER!” I backed away with a flushed expression, “And what kind of siblings address each other as ‘darling’?!”

Marina chuckled at my words, realizing I saw through her teasing, “Heh, we’re both in the ‘Only Child’ faction, so I wouldn’t know~”

Dammit, I’m dancing in the palm of her hand, I can’t let this go on. I gotta straighten up my act, or she’ll just continue making fun of me for the rest of my life!

“Marina…” I leaned in close, surprising her with my sudden action.

“Fueh…?!”

“…”

Ah crap! I just wanted her to back away, but now it looks like I’m leaning in for a kiss as well! With the way we’re situated, there’s just no other way of looking at it! I hope she doesn’t find what I did creepy-WHY ARE YOU PUCKERING YOUR LIPS OUT, WOMAN?!

This isn’t right, this isn’t right… Ooh, I shouldn’t be doing this with her, but the mood is set up this way, plus we’re both in a delusional state from the hunger… W-Well, one quick peck wouldn’t hurt, right…?

“…?” Marina still waited for me with her lips puckered out.

“…Ngah!” But in the end I still backed out, “…I-I just wanted to scold you for always teasing me. I’m sorry for causing a misunderstanding.”

“Hmph!” She made a disappointed face while turning away, “What kind of husband doesn’t kiss his wife? That won’t do, darling!”

“O-Oi?! Didn’t you say our fake identities were siblings, not lovers?!”

“Eh, same difference.” She said as she opened the front door cooly.

“It isn’t though!? H-Hey! Where are you going now?!”

“To the fountain, I wanna get something to drink before we depart for Centralis. We’re apparently destined to get rich if we go meet the Gryses, remember?”

This girl…! Making me risk my healthy relationship with Cecily before just waltzing out of the house like it’s no big deal…! Well, at least she finally snapped out of her tease display and is actually doing something productive for a change…

I was now left all alone in the house, with nothing to do. But damn, I’m a young man who just endured absolute torture by the hands of that damned succubus. Because of that, my little guy can’t sit still! Hmm…

“…R-Rubbing one out wouldn’t be c-cheating, right?”

***

After a delightful, yet vigorous chicken-choking took place, I felt a lot calmer about the entire situation. That thing I heard about Post-Nut Clarity really does work, huh? I feel like I’m on top of the world!

“Honey~! I’m hoome~!” The front doors burst open, and the young lady whom I fantasized about just minutes prior came in while carrying two bags.

“Isn’t that something the husband says, though?”

“Never mind that, hubby!” She said as she shoved the two bags in my face, “This is more important! I got us some bread!”

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing! The nerve of this woman, and JUST when I told her about my conscience regarding food theft.

“Marina! Did you even listen to a word I said?!”

“I did, and I offer a counter-argument.” She said as if she rehearsed this, “I heard what you said loud and clear, and I found a loophole in your logic. You see, if I’m the one who steals the food, then you can just enjoy the food without having to feel bad about it, since you’re not the one who did it!”

“What kind of logic is that?!” I continued berating her, “That’s it! Do whatever you want, but I will absolutely NOT be partaking in eating stolen food.”

“Really? Cool, more for me! Man, I’m starving…” She said as she happily munched down on her loaf, “Mmm! Delicious! I really went out of my way to stealthily take this without being noticed, so absolutely no one would care if you were to join me.”

I know what she’s doing. She’s trying to tempt me into eating as well, and she’s definitely not holding back either. From guilt-tripping me by telling me how hard it was for her to accomplish this, to reassuring me that I’m not stepping on anyone’s foot if I really were to take a bite myself, the whole nine yards!

“Alright, now that I ate my share, I guess I wouldn’t want your share to go to waste…”

I struggled internally with all my might, before heading off to sleep. When in doubt, sleep the hunger away! That’s the tried and true method, after all!

“Ah, shucks!” Marina stopped before she bit down on the other loaf, “I’m really full from my share. Unless someone was willing to eat it themselves, I guess I’ll have to throw it away… What. a. shame.”

“Marina?”

“Hm?”

“…I’m gonna take a short nap right now.”

“Oh, alright.”

“…Marina?”

“Yes, Lune?”

“…Leave some for me when I wake up, okay?”

She giggled at my sheepish and frail plea, as if she finally won a huge victory.

“Of course, dear.”

Nghh…! And knock it off with the ‘dears’ and ‘darlings’ already! Geez!