Chapter 73

7 Silver

“Welcome aboard the SpineSplitter,” I said, greeting a very grumpy GloomGlower.

“Ogo,” GloomGlower said. “Let’s talk. You’ve been ignoring me.”

“Right this way,” I said.

GloomGlower had to hustle to keep up with me, even with my slow strides. The diminutive goblin was in a foul mood. I was used to shouting back and forth with him. The king was quiet this time.

We talked over hollowed tusks of orc ale. Bitter orc ale. GloomGlower made no complaint, but I already knew he didn’t like it.

“How dare you,” GloomGlower said quietly. “You go around my back and deal with the Thrush monster? What do you think this is? That’s the first matter. The first problem between us. You think I don’t have ears? You think you can hide things from me?”

“Who told you?”

“Voices carry, stupid. Orcs aren’t the quietest bunch.”

“Don’t underestimate me. I’m not stupid.”

“I know how to push your buttons.”

“Try me!” I bellowed.

“See? You’re already losing your temper. Tsk, tsk.”

I stared him down. GloomGlower was having none of it.

“You can’t threaten me,” he said. “We need each other. You need me for goblin spit beer. I need you to buy it from me.”

“I’ve already made a deal. Half of next month’s production will go to us. After that, we’ll be buying everything Hawkin brews.”

“That’s not up to Hawkin, or Thrush,” GloomGlower said. He slowly smiled. “Where do you think he gets the ptooey from?”

I raised a brow.

“That’s right,” GloomGlower said. “He gets it from me. Do you know how to brew spit beer without ptooey?”

“No. How?”

“Read between the lines, stupid! You can’t!”

“Call me stupid one more time, and I’ll hang you by the balls.”

“You don’t want to threaten me,” he drawled.

“What do you want, king GloomGlower?”

“Calling me king! Now that’s a bit better isn’t it? I’ll tell you what I want; your majesty wants things to be right between us. I don’t want Thrush to sell you any beer. I want it all to go through me first.”

“That’s not my problem,” I said. “If you won’t sell ptooey beer to him, then we’ll just buy whatever else he brews.”

I rose to leave. GloomGlower squirmed in his seat.

“N-now hold on a minute Ogo—mighty Ogo. We might have gotten off on the wrong toe. Let’s have another round to drink and let’s discuss things further.”

We drank.

“I need my own supply for the goblins,” GloomGlower said as a matter of fact.

“I need the fifteen thousands barrels FlyBooger promised me you’d have,” I said with an edge.

“You know very well Hawkin can’t brew nearly that much.”

“He’s increasing his production every month. He plans to keep doing that. I spoke to him the other day.”

The conversation promptly escalated into a shouting match. I fought to have the right to receive all the beer Hawkin could produce, and GloomGlower threatened to withhold ptooey. After the fifth time we circled around in our arguments, we sat down for another drink. We glared at each other for a few minutes until we cooled enough to talk again.

“The only way forward is to split the beer half and half,” GloomGlower said. “I need half of what I get for my goblins. I’ll sell you the other half I get.”

“I’m not going to pay more from a middleman,” I said.

“Ogo. We’re ripping these guys off. We’re paying scraps for the beer. What’s a few more silver going to cost you when you buy from me?”

“More silver is going to cost me more silver.”

“I won’t raise the price on ptooey. I swear it. Cross my heart. Why don’t we settle in the middle. You buy half the beer from Thrush. I buy the other half. Then you buy what I offer you for, let’s say, ten silver per barrel.”

“I’m not here for your jokes,” I chuckled.

“Eight silver.”

Eight silver is one more than I’m spending when buying from Thrush. Which means that GloomGlower is buying beer from them at an insanely low rate.

“Five silver,” I said.

“What!” GloomGlower said. “That’s out of the question!”

“I’m not buying,” I said. “I think we’re done here.”

GloomGlower began to panic. He began pleading with me. That’s when I knew I had him exactly where I wanted.

“Tell you what,” I said, “I’ll go as high as seven silver per barrel with one condition.”

GloomGlower mewled like a cat’s warning. “I don’t like conditions,” he hissed.

“It’s an easy condition.”

“I’ll consider it if you’re serious.”

“I'll buy the beer from you at seven silver per barrel if your goblins transport all the beer down to the port.”

“The port? That’s what the drills are for?”

“The shore,” I said, ignoring the rest.

“That’s it? That’s your condition?”

“That’s my condition.”

“Pick my nose! You have a deal!”

We shook on it.

After GloomGlower was escorted off my ship, I crossed several gangways to find Haf. He was napping below deck in his cabin. An oil lamp cast an orange light through smudged glass. I woke the orc up to update him.

“Wait,” Haf groggily said. “This doesn’t make sense. You’re paying seven silver per barrel from both Thrush and GloomGlower?”

“That’s right, and we don’t have to worry about transporting the beers down to the port. GloomGlower’s goblins will take care of that.”

“Wait a minute, I’m still stuck on the fact that GloomGlower is a middleman, and you’re paying the same price from both.”

“The one explanation is that GloomGlower secured a low rate from Thrush. We orcs came second, and either Thrush learned from his experience with GloomGlower the swindler, or I couldn’t negotiate well enough.”

“The bottom line is that it’s still an excellent price,” Haf said with a yawn.

“Every silver counts,” I agreed. “Putting the work in now will make us that much richer in the end.”

“Buto and Ugu are content with your plan. It’s a good one this time.”

“I’d much prefer a consistent trade route than raiding the goblins,” I said.

“I’d prefer a fist fight,” Haf said.

“That depends on Hawkin. If he can increase his production every month, we’ll profit long term. If he can’t, it might come down to fighting.”

There came a lull in the conversation, no doubt from both of us salivating at the prospect of battle and wealth. When another yawn struck Haf, he said, “How’d the hunt go?”

“Days of nothing. Not a footprint, not a whiff. There are no animals for days.”

“Odd.”

“I felt uneasy for the first day and a half. After that, I still had hackles the further we hunted, but they weren’t as spine-chilling.”

“It’s got to be magic,” Haf said after a pause.

“I’ll bet you the human is using magic,” I said.

“Could it be Thrush?”

“A monster? No.”

“How are things with the port?”

“We start tomorrow.”