It's been over two weeks since Mandy and I had last seen each other. She hasn't called, she hasn't text me back, I had recently just sent her another message, and still no response. I thought maybe I did something wrong, or did I? I took a deep breath and slowly sighed. Mandy is one of my closest friends, she always gave me the best advice when it comes to pretty much anything. I remember Mandy helping me prepare for the bar exam, and how she told me to take some deep breaths, and follow my gut.

It was the tenth message I sent to Mandy, and I seriously don't know what I did wrong. I was beginning to feel really depressed, like this darkness was still controlling my life. Until the next five days are one heck of a ride for me.

I was trapped in bed feeling severely depressed, and I couldn't get out of bed.

I had to call in work so many times that I cosine make it to work, but then the law firm told me I was taking to many off days, and that they needed me back to work. So I came to work feeling severely depressed, that I just couldn't bare the pain. The heartache, where my heart was just aching, and I felt so bad. I didn't think I could attend another trial, and I felt so lost. I was worried about Mandy. I don't know if she's mad at me or something. I tried to FaceTime her one time, but she didn't answer. I had on these shades, and I was covering my depressed eyes.

At the building entrance, or in Federal Buildings with multiple tenants near the entrance to the courtrooms, I pass through a screening station. This station is staffed by Court Security Officers (CSOs). I can expect the Court Security Officers to check the contents of my briefcase by passing them through an X-ray machine. I can also expect to be required to walk through some form of metal detection equipment. My items I brought with me will be identified in this screening process. One court officer who I am good friends with, John Sully, told me to take off my shades. I then took my sunglasses off, and John noticed I didn't look like myself. I put the glasses, my briefcase and other objects in the tray. I was told to empty my pockets.

Eventually, my items were scanned through, and I was being checked out by a different court officer. She told me to lift my arms and hand as she scanned me through. I never really liked going through security, even though it's for safety.

Jacob was helping me clean the yard, picking up leaves, tree branches, pinecones, and I mowed, Mrs. Hutchinson was sitting on the porch knitting, since it was one of her favorite things to do. She even told me a story once her mother had made a quilt. I was exhausted from working, even though it's cold outside, Jacob followed me from behind as I sat down on one of the porch chairs and Mrs. Hutchinson was humming. I had a lot on my mind. I eventually told Jacob before he sat down, to get the hot cocoa from the kitchen.

One for me, Jacob and Mrs. Hutchinson. I even taught Jacob to be extremely careful when it comes to hot objects, and to not burn himself. So Jacob went inside the house, and I watched him do so. I made sure he went inside all the way, and the door was completely shut.

I sighed, turning my face to Mrs. Hutchinson and she were humming, while continuing to knit. I didn't know how to explain to this thing I had on my mind, I haven't been able to think clearly because of it. Mrs. Hutchinson then just looks at me, and she could tell I had something on my mind. I cleared my throat, and Mrs. Hutchinson then laid down her knit on her lap and she asked me if I was feeling okay.

I sighed, shaking my head not knowing, and shrugged. Mrs. Hutchinson asked me whatever was bothering me this time. "Um, I–I don't know, I just–I just," my voice began breaking.

Mrs.Hutchinson sighed, and she asked me once again what was bothering me this time. I sighed, wiping my tears, and I scoffed. "I–I am starting to believe in everything they're saying."

Mrs.Hutchinson was confused, "What do you mean?" I sighed, continuing to hold my tears, and swallowed, I sighed once again. "No?" Mrs. Hutchinson asked, wondering."Ryan.. you're not thinking about giving up on Jacob, are you?" I sniffed, wiping my nose with my fingers, and I chuckled, scoffing at the same time. Mrs. Hutchinson sighed, and she leaned up closer to me, and told me to look at her. I did, I looked at Mrs.Hutchinson.

"Why?"

I swallowed, before I spoke. "I'm seriously tired of people who are looking at me as someone who is protecting a criminal, and I think it's best if Jacob would be... you know," I said in a heartbreaking voice.

Mrs. Hutchinson couldn't believe what she was hearing from me. Jacob then had come out of the house with our hot cocoa. He handed me one for me, and Mrs.Hutchinson. Jacob didn't want one, so he sat down on the porch swing.