All right, finally. Croc Rocky growled as they dove into the rock and began swimming towards where they thought the cats were, preparing to fly out of the ground and swallow them whole. And then they somehow found themselves in the water, having overshot the cats completely and having swum into an intersecting waterway. Rocky felt the sewage fly into their mouth and fill the tunnel they had dug out as they closed their mouth and attempted to swim through. Why the hell is this happening again? Rocky screamed internally as the water pressed them against the back of the small tunnel that Rocky had just refilled. (“CROCODILE ROCK!”) Rocky gurgled, flying upwards, burrowing through the ceiling, and luckily escaping therethrough.

But the luck seemed to end there.

Rocky turned to the side, soaking wet and bleeding through its stump arm, a pale colour suffusing its green and black face. “Well, well . . . it appears the Civ of my little friend has deemed it unlucky to bring you towards me.” Rocky turned to see a man in a white lab coat with slick black hair and dark sunglasses. The scientist was holding a second black cat in his hands, stroking it gently as it purred. “Do you remember me?”

Rocky stepped back and began to growl instinctively. Is this . . . is this him? Rocky thought. Why are we growling? We wanted to come here for him to fix us, but somehow, we can’t seem to shake this ‘feeling’ . . .

“Have you come here to kill me? Do you want me to cure you?” Nero asked, looking down at Rocky with a slick smirk on his face. Rocky’s growling slowed, and it nodded its snout slightly. “Ha! This is a common result, it would seem. Of course, I’m afraid that’s impossible. Rainbow in the Dark’s ability cannot be undone. And besides! Why would you want to be cured when you aren’t sick? You’re a perfect killing machine, my creature!”

Rocky began to growl as the ultimatum was spelt out. If this guy won’t cooperate, then we can use him instead of those weird cats!

Nero’s right hand suddenly split apart into seven copies, each a distinct hue, many of them petting the cat in his arms as the others waved towards him. “Well . . . almost perfect. Aren’t these things marvellous? I got them from some lady who was leaving town,” Nero added as a total of nine cats began to curl up at his feet. “You have a certain degree of intelligence in you, that I’m almost certain of. Which is why I hope you can understand that pursuing me is completely pointless. I assume you’ve noticed strange things happening to you—yes, my creature?” Rocky’s growling increased in intensity. “I found the most beautiful Civ a while ago. And now I’m happy to say that I’ve found the perfect user!” Nero gestured with his many arms theatrically toward the cats. “You’re better off succumbing to your instincts and living a life of simplicity. If you’ve come seeking a higher purpose, then I’m afraid your journey ends here.” Nero turned away and began to walk down the tunnel, leaving Rocky alone.

That bastard! He doesn’t just get to make us and then vanish! He needs to answer for this! FOR ME! Rocky let out a guttural roar, pouncing on Nero’s back, preparing to bring its jaws down on Nero’s head. Yet, the scientist whipped around at blinding speed, the reflection of Rocky’s face catching in his sunglasses. Then, the black cat covered Nero’s face, and Rocky’s chomp slammed into the creature’s head.

“Cat People.”

Suddenly, Rocky felt dozens of puncture wounds appear on its head, tearing through the reptilian flesh with insane weight and force. Rocky flew back, falling onto the ground as blood leaked from the top of its face. W-what? Rocky felt the top of its head, all the while noting the many sizable punctures in the roof of its shared mouth. Rocky looked up and saw Nero holding the cat out at arm’s length as a small droplet of blood leaked down its face, causing it to hiss and wince as Nero held it out by the scruff of its neck. Did this guy use that cat as a shield? Is this the kind of person he is? Rocky continued to growl, staring at Nero in animalistic rage.

“And to think I actually thought you had some sort of intelligence about you . . .” Nero nodded his head in feigned disappointment. “Come any closer and your condition is bound to get far worse.”

Rocky didn’t listen, taking another step forward as Nero walked away, turning back and heading down the waterway. Rocky could only limp pathetically a few metres behind him. Then, it felt a searing pain in its head. Like a migraine—like something was pushing on its very brain. Like something was growing inside its head. Rocky whimpered in pain. I-is this a Steve attack? What’s happening!? Rocky whined internally as its brain burned.

Nero turned back. “You’ve been pursuing these cats for a while, haven’t you? Then, I’m afraid fortune isn’t on your side. Let’s see, the odds of developing cancer for a dog are around one in four in their lifetime—before something else gets them. It might be a bit higher due to your mutations. And of course, you’re not very old, which means the odds of you developing the brain tumour that’s currently growing in your head is even lower. Which means it would take a stroke of bad luck to induce one in you.” Nero chuckled as he pet the slightly injured cat in his arms. “You could go to the hospital and they could cure you easily—but who would want to?”

Rocky scuttled back in terror as blood leaked from the top of its head and down its throat. This bastard . . . he puts us on this planet . . . just to kill us? Rocky looked at the cats, which were now on all sides. And the one he had almost sacrificed to protect himself. I don’t like cats but . . . I feel a strange kinship with them like we were cut from the same cloth. I want . . . to protect them, but I don’t know how to get past their ability!

“You know, I’d actually like it if you pursued these cats. I’d like to see the maximum power of their Civ, Cat People,” Nero mused, goading him with a taunting motion from one of his coloured arms. Then, he smirked as he turned away and began to walk down the waterway. Many of the cats stayed behind, however, lying down on the cold metal. Rocky looked down at the cats.

Let’s just cut our losses. We can’t beat these things. We’re too injured to do anything, and we’re so hungry, Croc Rocky thought, whining to their other half.

There needs to be a catch, Dog Rocky asserted as they stared down at the cats and then up to Nero, who had almost rounded one of the corners.

What?

This guy can turn multiple organisms into one, right? That’s what he did with us, right?

Okay . . .

Look at the cats. Rocky looked down at them.

They look delicious, I don’t understand your point.

They’re all distinct organisms. And I’m guessing they all have that Steve ability, right? I mean, when we were pursuing the first black one, we almost drowned. Dog Rocky gestured to the stream with their tail. I don’t think they’re nine separate cats. I think they were conjoined into one organism and their ability lets them split apart into nine pieces.

That’s stupid.

No, it’s not! How else would they all possess that same power—that “bad luck” thing? And why WOULDN’T this guy combine them into one organism? That’s his whole deal, it seems. Dog Rocky coughed as more blood trickled down their throat.

Fine! So what if they can turn into one big cat? If anything, that seems worse for us!

No, it isn’t. Because if they all turn into one cat, that means the doctor man can’t be holding one! And then we can eat him!

Okayyyy! You had me at “eat him.”

That was the last thing I thought to you.

Then maybe you should’ve thought it earlier. So, how do we get them all to conjoin? Do we need to make them angry or something?

Maybe. It’s worth a shot, Dog Rocky thought, beginning to bark as loudly as possible, head jerking back and forth, blood spraying everywhere. Suddenly, the eight cats began to stir and jump into the air, hissing and growling at Rocky’s antagonistic disturbances. This might be working!

Rocky barked and snapped its jaws, putting on a daunting display of aggressive behaviours. The felines were whipped into a fervour as Rocky began to chase its tail—one that could be easily caught because it was as long as a tall man. Dang, it isn’t as fun when you’re a crocodile . . .

Rocky was facing the water while spinning around. Quickly, its spinning stopped, however, as the silhouette of something extremely large appeared in the water behind them. Rocky slowly turned back and came snout to snout with a large . . . creature. It stood on its large hind legs, with a few smaller arms poking out in front of it. It had patchwork fur, and Rocky could see seams where the colour of one of the cat’s fur ended and another began. It had two huge yellow eyes, each with nine slitted pupils arranged in three columns. It was a bipedal cat, but it had the body shape of something closer to a velociraptor than to a human being. It wasn’t huge, but it was standing at about six feet tall, causing a long silhouette to stretch out in front of it. It let out a long hiss, exposing rows and rows of sharp teeth, some as large as Rocky’s. And then it took a step forward.