After yet another awkward pause, those seem to happen a lot around me for some odd reason, we resumed our interoga- ahem, our team building efforts with my new subordinate. I may have had the wrong impression of her, actually. If she’s done enough to get the government to be concerned about her existence she can’t be all that bad.

“So,” I finally spoke, thinking of the least OPSEC-breaking way to beat around the subject, “How does a neuroscience student end up going all ‘Sabrina’ to the point of getting our boss interested in you? Among other things, it just doesn’t seem to fit the ‘hard science’ vibe you give off.”

“I could ask you the same question. You seem a bit air-headed to be some gun-toting government thug.” She glared into her drink.

“Veteran hiring preference, I suppose.” Not that I had been given any choice in the matter.

“You don’t really seem like the prior service type... actually, it’s understandable.” She nodded as if something came to her. “The person I lost had also been in the military, though you’d never think it to look at her.”

“Lost? What happened?” I tried my best to sound understanding.

“She went hiking in the woods one day, and got separated from the friends she was with. They turned back when they noticed she was missing, but there was no trace of her. She was athletic, knew how to survive in the woods, and had been a Marine on top of all of that. Someone like that doesn’t just disappear into nothing under normal circumstances, even if she was prone to daydreaming and spacing out.” She seemed to hesitate, unsure if I’d believe her. As if she hadn’t been told right-out that I got caught up in that whole reality-tearing incident the boss-lady mentioned. I’m more curious about how familiar her friend sounds, but it’d be rude to get her off-topic.

“So, your first thought was to turn to magic?” I couldn’t help but ask.

“It would have been one thing if she had disappeared. But her shoes, jacket and car keys showed up, neatly folded! On top of a rock outcropping that was on the trail, in an area that had been searched multiple times. That’s not normal. Of course I’d think something weird was happening. And then there was the cover-up. They all of a sudden claimed her apartment was full of illegal firearms, and that she had faked her disappearance to avoid prosecution. I couldn’t accept that. So I dug deeper. And deeper. The missing person’s cases were the first level of it all, since there’s a clear pattern of similar disappearances throughout the country, if not the whole world.” She took another sip of beer to calm herself. But yes, I was aware of both disappearances and the cover-ups.

“Then there was the more...unusual theories behind these disappearances. It seemed like a stretch at the time, but I was desperate. I- I figured if there was any chance, I should take it, no matter how slim. So I went further down Ufology sites, before realizing how similar many of these accounts were to less, uh, extraterrestrial kinds of theories about disappearances and happenings. I refused to believe the narrative that she was a criminal who ran away, and what’s that thing Sherlock Holmes had said about improbable solutions?” She looked embarrassed about this, as if falling into practicing magic was the part of this story she’d be judged most for. Liah also seemed to think so.

“So, you were obsessed enough with this woman that you went full cuckoo?” She asked. What the hell, Liah.

“Does it make me crazy if I was right?” Sandra rebutted.

“I guess not, but most people don’t turn to magic over a missing person.” Liah said, deadpan. “I’m not going to call it petty, and on a certain level it's much more laudable than throwing out hexes at every minor misfortune, but what you did was way beyond what’s ‘normal.’”

“I just started experimenting with what I found out of books, taking meticulous notes to try and identify what did or didn’t work, and refined things from there. Honestly, the more I researched it the more it seemed to mesh with what I knew about the way the human mind works. It really is quite fascinating how much of an influence the human mind can have on reality. It’s not full on Mythbusters ‘I reject your reality and substitute my own’ but it’s up there...” She began to ramble on.

At least we have a more technically minded coworker now? Yeah, no, this is like some weird ad-hoc gathering of closeted misfits with screws loose and at least one probably diagnosable developmental disorder in the case of Sandra here.

If we checked any more boxes we’d be at risk of Marvel putting out a new critically-despised superhero team based off us. Or even worse, an adaption from a streaming service. Anyone who’s stupid enough to have faith in the government should be thankful that what we’re doing here is classified, because it’d be the equivalent of finding out that not only is Santa Claus not real, but that your parents used his existence as an excuse to rack up an enormous debt in your name and sell you off to the mafia.

“So Sandra,” I interrupted. “How does that lead to you ending up here? I already have a general idea, but what’s your explanation for it?”

“I came up with a, a ritual, to try and find her. You know, the woman I was looking for, Rose.” Now I could swear I recognize that name. I’m probably just thinking of the Titanic though. “The first one, kind of failed, but I was able to see she was alive. So I knew there was a chance. The second ritual was one to bring me to her. But...”

“But..?”Both me and Liah asked.

“She turned me down. She found someone on the other side, and said she didn’t want to leave. When the ritual ended I got snatched as I was walking to my car, and your boss blackmailed me into signing some papers to work for her.”

“That’s kind of anti-climatic. After all the shit we had to go through...” I muttered

I felt a slight pang of guilt as Sandra cringed at my statement. Then I remembered how shitty last night was. It’s hard to believe that hell of a night, complete with demons and monsters, only ended half a day ago. And my boss is already chucking more jobs and chores at me, like babysitting a heartbroken magician capable of tearing apart reality. On second thought, maybe I shouldn’t be hard on her. I may be what some would consider a Second Amendment extremist, but even a nuke generally leaves the fabric of the world intact.

My brain must be refusing to comprehend what occurred. This wasn’t just an “oopsie,” this was one step away from “I have become death, destroyer of worlds.” Though I kind of prefer the translation of “I have become Time, destroyer of worlds.” But you get the general idea. It’d be like hiring a war criminal… oh, so like early NASA. Or any of those other agencies that snatched people up following WW2. Come to think of it, I did find that Operation Paperclip document in the archives a while back.

So anyways, kid gloves. I looked to Liah, who nodded in acknowledgment. But before we could speak, the waitress arrived with our meals. An awkward twenty minutes followed, but at least my burger was good.

Ordering another beer to wash down the meal, I felt a kick at my ankle, and a feeling of urging from Liah. We don’t really know this girl well, but it was probably our duty, for the sake of the world, to at least attempt to cheer her up a bit.

“Did you have any plans for the rest of the day?” I asked the sorceress in question.

“None, nothing, all I have on me is my purse and I have no idea when I’m going to get a ride home.”

“Well, we could at least show you around the area. Since you’ll be working near here. There’s actually a really good used bookstore just down the roa- ouch.” Liah seemed to think dragging Sandra off to look at musty books wasn’t the right choice. Seeing as she got forced into working at a warehouse full of musty books I could see her point, but Sandra’s face brightened up.

On some level, there’s a solidarity between antisocial loners, and in my experience bookstores are a surefire way to at least take their minds off problems. Hell, my roommate in the Marines...wait, wasn’t her first name Rose? Not sure since everyone just used last names, but I could swear… Nah, it’s not important now. I wouldn’t worry about it. The main thing is that, when it comes to dealing with unpleasant things, people like us need books to take our minds off our troubles, not alcohol or partying.

“Weren’t you literally just planning on drinking here to forget about last night?” Liah interrupted my thoughts.

“Two different things, Liah.” Last night sucked, but the kind of suck was completely different. Apples and oranges.

“I don’t know, is there really a difference?” Liah’s brow furrowed.

“One was just monsters trying to kill us. Simple, cut and dry, and with none of the lingering crap outside of exhaustion and crashing after an adrenaline high. Way less lingering than the icky mire of relationships.” I explained.

“The exact kind of answer I’d expect from someone who’s first reaction to people spreading rumors is to start throwing curses about. For someone who doesn’t outwardly look like a meat-head, you really do tend to give off jock vibes at times.” She let out a snort. Very classy. “Not that I mind, it just makes it that much more funny when you start crying over magical girl anime.”

“I have nothing to be ashamed of.” I said unabashedly, hiding the shame of her bringing such a thing up in front of my new subordinate. We’re trying to cheer her up, I can’t imagine finding out her new supervisor is a massive nerd would help things out.