《Phenomena the Basic Witch and The Mind Safari》Chapter 34: The Mayor of Simpleton
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Cushy seats and good friends were the only things to keep Mena comfortable on the short ride to the Mind Jungles.
As they passed the central square of Dula--the Kingdom of Imagination, and the Brain Sea, Mena pressed her nose to the window wondering if those were some of her next stops on her journey to find the sages.
At last, the trainbow chugged along the rainbow tracks into an enormous brush of cranial trees where a gold plated station awated them.
"I forgot how close we are to the Mind Jungles now," May said.
Menas stomach grumbled. She wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not. When they disembarked, they were greeted by two curious, if dapper characters.
The first was a tall lion man in a purple suit with an oversized carnation and a curling mustache. His eyes were closed proudly, but sometimes they'd open and shift from side to side.
The other was an overgrown ape man in a tuxedo. He sported slicked back hair and an equally curly mustache. Mena could hardly keep from giggling at their overly pompous appearance.
"Hullo hullo hullabaloo!" the lion greeted them in an important and posh voice. "Welcome esteemed guests and talented entertainers."
Some of the Nightdream students shot bewildered glances at him.
"For those who don't know me, my name is Maximilian Lionheart, mayor of our fabulous gated community and head of the Bourgebeasts Art Preservation Society!"
Maximilian chuckled. "I may be a lion politician, but let it be known that I'm a dutiful elected official."
Everyone turned their eyes to the simian, who couldn't help but roll his eyes at his boss's lame joke. Maximilian grinned and held his velvet white gloves out to present his companion. "And this is Monkey C. Monkeydu, or Monkler as I call him."
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Monkler gritted his square ape teeth. "I'm actually the committee planner and schedule organizer, but he thinks it's funny to call me his butler."
"A monkey butler is hilarious!" Maximilian chortled. "Especially one in a little suit."
"If it wasn't for my pension," Monkler sighed. "I'd go bananas!"
Maximilian put his paws together. "Anyway, you know the drill. If you want access to our lush jungles and vegetation, you must entertain 3000 cultured beasts,"--Lionheart raised his bushy eyebrows--"Many of whom are as savage critics as they are carnivores...No pressure though!"
***
The humid jungles warmed Mena's skin, but as the trees curled and twisted in cranial patterns, an odd chill emanated around her. It was a chill Mena hadn't felt in her own flesh since her time in Wormwood. She walked over to Stellaris, who lead the party with Maximilian and Electra. Mena tugged on her teacher's sleeve. "Be sure to tell them about the possessed security guards, teach!"
"I will, dear," Stellaris said. "Once we get there at least. It'd be rude to immediately suggest there's an insurrection about to happen at the hands of their own employees."
"But it's true!" Mena pouted. She was starting to feel unsure of her teacher's plan.
They soon arrived at a vast white wall. A pair of golden gates were erected at the center of them.
"Behold," Maximilian boasted, spreading his arms. "Our shining beacon of entertainment in the middle of this heathen jungle--The Grasspeare Memorial Treeater."
Two guards heaved aside the gates which opened with a mighty roar. Mena's jaw dropped open. The treeather was even bigger than the one in the Dream Castle. The name finally made sense when she saw an enormous knotted tree growing from the center, creating covering for all the speculators and actors. A refreshing breeze relieved their skin beneath the mammoth tree.
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"I hope you'll appreciate our hospitality as much as we appreciate some good bourgeois entertainment!" Maximilian said and he snarled. "And as much as I appreciate a good mane massage. Oh Monkler!"
Monkler walked over and began massaging Maximilian 's bushy mane. The lion mayor roared in pleasure and began stomping his foot. "Oh and Monkler?"
"Yes sir?"
"If you find any bugs in my luxurious mane, you are welcome to eat them. Consider it as a tip!"
Monkler rolled his eyes again. "Oh, you are so generous sir "
Stellaris raised her voice. "I'm sorry to interrupt this moment of erm… affection, but I have to warn you that there might be a threat to this play."
"Erm?" Maximilian said, raising his eyebrow.
"We've been informed that Anguish the Blood Siren is in these jungles and she might want to put an end to our presentation."
"Nonsense!" Maximilian said gruffly. "You see those gates? No one is getting here!"
"I think you forgot that witches fly on brooms," Janus said wryly
"That poses a problem," Maximilian remarked. "But our security is top notch. If this Anguish worms their way in here, we'll fling 'em out "
Suddenly the brainwashed lion-cheetah in his blue security jumpsuit strolled across the premise.
"Well!" Mena said, pointing dramatically at the security guard. "Not if security like him is brainwashed."
Maximilian faced around to see who Mena was pointing at. "Larry?" Maximilian said. "He's been an experienced employee for fifteen years."
Larry the brainwashed lion-cheetah held up his hands in dismay. "I dunno why they're out for me, boss. I got a wife and five cubs to feed!"
"Exactly," Maximilian said. "What makes you think he's an inside agent for this Anguish fellow?"
Larry's lips curled into a catlike smirk as soon as Maximilian turned around. Incited by his taunt, Mena screamed, "Because he's a dirty lying cheater!"
Maximilian gasped and grasped at his beastly pearls.
Monkler uttered, "How rude!"
"Young lady!" Maximilian howled as his nostrils flared. "I will not have you use such a slur on this premise. If you do that once more, your play will be cancelled and your name will be dragged in all our papers!"
Mena turned bright red as many of her classmates glared at her.
Maximilian's raised hair lowered and his nostrils returned to normal.
"Now then, if youre done profiling our good service men and women, I shall show you our dressing rooms.
As everyone walked past Larry, Mena turned to him. He gave an evil smile and ran his paw across his throat.
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Virtuous Cultivation
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